(Closed) open bar conundrum…

posted 10 years ago in Food
Post # 17
Member
132 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

we are splitting the night (yes I’ll probably take heat for this I know)

we are having cocktail hour from 5-6 with open bar then closing the bar from 6-6:60 for introductions, first dances etc. (there will be wine on the table at that time though)

Dinner is from 6:30-7:30 and during that time, its a cash bar. open bar from 7:30-9:30 then the last 1/2 hour (9:30-10) is cash bar.

soda and water is free all night. there will be signs at the bar so noone will be suprised that the bar switches from open to cash, we’re hosting what we can afford 

Post # 18
Member
5229 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort

I live in Florida and have been to weddings in Michigan, Maryland, Texas, Georgia, and many in Florida. I have never, ever been to a wedding that had a bar that wasn’t an open bar. I went to one wedding where the reception was at a church and there was no bar at all, but I’ve never been to a cash bar wedding. I grew up in a standard middle class household and my circle is all middle class and lower middle class. I believe you host what you can afford, and what you cannot afford is simply not present. If you can’t afford alcohol, you have a dry wedding. If you can only afford beer and wine, then you only have beer and wine.

I was lucky that my mother paid for our reception. The open bar part was $55/person.

Post # 19
Member
8490 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

OP, I wonder if you might have misread. I can’t imagine anyone anywhere considering an open bar tacky. Not at all, for any reason. Someone else mentioned possibly a religious objection, but I still don’t see how that could be considered “tacky”. Someone might think it was sinful or insensitive, but not tacky. Can you link to the post you’re referring to?

Post # 20
Member
792 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

I think the bar type really depends on region like so many other things wedding related. For example, I know a heated topic on the bee at times is a Buck & Doe, which is basically an event the Bride and Groom put on to help raise money towards the wedding or honeymoon. Buck & Doe’s seem so strange to many people, but in my region of Ontario, people look forward to them and wonder why someone wouldn’t have it. I’m not having one, but I like going to them and it’s a fun night out with family and friends.

Within my circle of friends and family, I have been to weddings that have been open bar, partial host bar and then cash bar. The atmosphere of the wedding definetly changes when it is an open bar, but no one ever bashes the Bride and Groom for not footing the bill. Were having a lunch reception, so a full open bar is not necessary as no one is going to pound back 7+ drinks during the course of a 3 hour lunch. Were offering wine and mimosa’s, anything else our guest wants and their on their own. I feel what we are offering is sufficient as no one I know would drink much, and may not even drink the wine, not big drinkers in our circle.

I would never judge someone for not offering a full bar. I’m there to celebrate with the Bride and Groom and support them. If they cannot afford a bar or feel the money would be better spent on something else, I wouldn’t think twice about it. If someone judges me for not having an open bar, I wouldn’t want them at my wedding. 

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