Post # 88
@Lily1217: oh, i have another suggestion, maybe its come up already – what about having an open for a limited time? my sister did that. it was much cheaper to have open bar for a set number of hours rather than for the duration of the entire wedding. the DJ announced it as well, so guests knew that after this time, they would have to start paying for drinks if they wanted.
Post # 89
I actually didn’t want liquor at our wedding, but we served beer and wine, and made sure that our venue had a catering policy that would allow us to bring in our own beverages. I think not giving your guests drinks so that you have more money for your honeymoon is on the rude side…I also don’t think you ought to give drink tickets to some people but not others. You wouldn’t invite people to your home and only offer some of them beverages. Whatever you do, make sure that everyone is treated the same and equally.
Post # 90
Everyone does cash bar here. Don’t put yourself in debt just to provide booze! We provided 2 bottles of wine for each table of 6, and the rest was up to them.
Post # 91
We went with a premium open bar for 6 hours (this includes everything even top shelf stuff). We didn’t think we could, but it became affortable at $8 per person for the whole night so we took that route.
I think it’s worth checking to see if they allow alcohol brought int. Had we not been able to afford the bar, we would have gone with getting bottles to bring in. We would have to pay corkage fee, but having some alchohol is better than having non..and your guest appreciates the attention to their drinking needs. 🙂
Post # 92
We are having a cash bar. An open bar doesnt make sense for our situation, as the majority of our guests do not drink, including myself & Fiance. We are having a champagne toast, that includes a refill per guest, but why should we pay for an open bar when maybe 5 people out of 50 will drink. Thats the same as opening the window and throwing a few thousand out, and exactly why I ignore etiquette garbo. What works for one might not work for another.
Our state law, zoning law, whatever also states that the venue must provide the booze, so we cant bring any in.
Post # 93
I dont think I would ever decline an invitation or think low of a bride and groom who didnt provide booze. Anyone who wouldnt
go because of lack of alcohol should be the ones who need to prioritize. In My Humble Opinion
Post # 94
I find that interesting actually. it sounds slightly expensive, if you only expect 5 guests to drink. are you paying bartenders and for a liquor license, etc? or does your venue just include bartenders as part of your package and it’s not that expensive? I’m just curious.
if I were in that situation, I would suggest not having a liquor bar at all, and no servers for the alcohol. I’d look into how I could provide a beer and wine only serve-yourself situation. it would save you a lot more $$ (unless maybe your venue does not allow it.)
Post # 95
all inclusive with our venue ..we arent paying a penny extra
If champagne isnt enough for our 3 guy friends who like to tip back a 6 pack in an hour, then they can buy what they want. And I am certain they will have no problems doing just that.
I think it is rude to not give guests some kind of food and drink, but where in the world did it become rude to not give your guests alcohol? I didn’t know that alcohol was such a necessity. Ditto gf, I couldnt have said it any better!
Post # 97
I agree with you. There is a big different from buying a few bottles of wine and a case of beer for people to show up at your house, than to throw a wedding which incures SOO many other costs, and on a much larger scale.
Post # 98
I just dont understand when the whole idea of alcohol at a wedding being one of the biggest parts of the wedding? Shouldn’t it be about friends and family celebrating the day with the couple? Why are people so offended because they won’t be able to drink for free all night at a wedding? I’m sorry, but If someone doesn’t want to come to my wedding because I am not giving them free alcohol all night, I probably don’t want you there at all. I am inviting people that are there to celebrate with us. WE will provide all sodas and non alcoholic drinks, but other than that I’m sorry you are on your own. We are having around 100 guests, over half are family on my fiance’s side. They all know we are paying for the wedding ourselves. We are not going above and beyond for anything. The only extra we are doing is a photo bench that a photographer is doing for us for $500. That wouldn’t even get a one hour open bar! No, we cannot bring our own liquor because of state laws. Shouldn’t weddings because about celebration and having a good time around the poeople that mean most to you?
Post # 99
Exactly why I said, if you’re expecting someone to provide you with booze so you can get juiced, you may have a problem 😀 I think lots of brides get so wrapped up into trying to make everyone happy when really, it’s about the bride and groom. Yes make your guests comfortable, but giving them free will to get sloshed, you’re asking for a disaster. I’m with you, I would never and have never been offended about paying for my own drinks. It’s always BYOB- Bring your own or Buy your own.
Post # 100
not everybody expects free alcohol in order to get plastered.
like I said before, if you, and the vast majority of your friends and family have strong convictions against drinking, then go ahead and have an alcohol-free wedding. but if you have some friends who enjoy a drink or two with dinner, trust me, they are going to be unhappy about going to a dry wedding.
I don’t see it as a “must” to provide hard alcohol (in fact, I did not want to). I do think it is a courtesy to provide at least a little bit of wine.
Post # 101
I want to be able to serve free alcohol to my guests, but cannot afford $12pp plus a bartender. I found a company that supplies a bartender and liquor liability insurance for $250 and will help me to determine how much alcohol we would need to do a few different signature cocktails. We will probably do 2-3 different cocktails depending on the cost, plus sodas for the under 21’s.
Post # 102
Wow, this is the first kind of heated debate I have seen on here.
First- I don’t think you should presume that because a guest or host wants an open bar that everyone is there to get trashed. And maybe this is because I am in my early thirties but some people just like a drink at a special or social occasion. We are only having beer, wine and champagne but that is because it is at a winery and that is are we are allowed to do. We almost picked a different venue because my Fiance knows that a lot of his family would like one or two hard drinks cause that is what they are used to. It doesn’t make them alcoholics…..but then again I have never been to a wedding where people get out of control.
Second- I feel bad for the person who used the dreaded “T” word. I don’t think she was calling someone tacky just the choice. And maybe it is just because I dont find that word very offensive. So i guess if someone did get offended by that word I would feel bad. But in my family and circle of friends if I asked “Can i invite this person and not their live in boyfriend” they would tell me its kind of tacky and I wouldn’t have a second thought about it.
I think your wedding will be beautiful and fun no matter what. I personally would feel bad making people pay for drinks and i think at weddings it gets really awkard when people are talking about ticket prices and guests are asking when the open bar will switch to cash bar etc. etc.
But I would MUCH rather have an cash bar then no bar at all. I have no problem paying for a drink. But if I am sitting at a table with people i don’t know and you want to see me dance the night away……having no alcohol for me really would be the worse option.