(Closed) opening a new can of worms vs addressing a problem

posted 6 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
1798 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

Personally, I wouldn’t talk to them because it seems unlikely for anything to actually change. As long as he accepts the fact that his family won’t change, it could be a good way for him to get some closure and accept not having a relationship with them.

Post # 5
Member
1798 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

@SimplyChic11:  I’ve seen some of your previous posts, so I see that he has a problem letting go of these bad relationships. Unfortunately, while it seems obvious to you and me, he has to reach the point of letting go on his own. I think you should support him in trying to end this relationships and creating realistic expectations for how they will react to his confrontation.

Post # 6
Member
2247 posts
Buzzing bee

Soon enough, your Darling Husband will realize that there is no point in trying to rationalize with these people.  They’re not good people.  They’re set in their ways and opinions and they’re never going to change.  Period.  But, they’re your DH’s family, so he’s gonna have to come to that realization, himself.

I come from a “I hurt you, you still love me and will do anything for me” family and it has been very frustrating during this process of planning our wedding, so I empathize with you and your Darling Husband.  There are a lot of relatives that I have chosen to cut out of my life (because I do not hold the opinion of everyone else about “forgive and forget”) and other relatives can’t get over it.  They’re angry at me for not having/wanting these people at my wedding.  They say, “Well, she’s family.  She loves you!”  So, I get guilted into letting these people in on the most important day of my life, which I’m sure they will cause drama for.

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