(Closed) Opinions on guests

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
4416 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Sounds like you’d be a perfect candidate for a B-list. As everyone on here will tell you, you should NEVER EVER invite more people than your venue can hold, because naturally that will cause everyone to RSVP yes and then you’ll have to uninvite people. Oops.  But if you send the first set of invites out very early, most people will return them right away and as the no’s start to come in, you can send out that many invites to the B-list. The only faux pas is if the B-listers find out they’re B-listers … so make sure they aren’t close with A-listers who might mention they’ve already gotten their invite, and make double-sure they get their invites at least two weeks before the RSVP date and at least four weeks before the wedding!

Post # 4
328 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I would hold off….you may be surprised! Our guest list was originally arond 175, and we were hoping for 150 (minimum for our venue). Then at the last minute FI’s parents added an additional 25 people, and I added in a coworker last minute. There will certainly be some no’s, but a lot of people we thought might not bother because it is out of town are planning on coming! Out of 199 invited, we have received 48 yes RSVP’s already, and only 3 no’s. Our deadline is still 3 weeks away, and tehre are several more out of state-ers that booked a hotel room but haven’t RSVPed yet so I am assuming they are a yes!  If possible, maybe send your invites out on the early side (9 weeks in advance or so) and see what type of response you get, then send to more if you find you have teh room.

Post # 6
250 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

How many of the invited are from out of town?  I found that most people from out of town can’t make it…

Post # 8
3618 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

I second the B list suggestion. Just be sure to change the RSVP date on that batch of invites so people won’t be offended with a late invite.

On a sidenote: our vendors did not count towards our guest count since they sit in a separate area and are at a discounted price.

Post # 9
60 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Be cautious to only invite more if you have confirmed regrets. One of my friends didn’t receive RSVPs from several people for her wedding and instead of calling to confirm if they were planning to attend or not, she assumed they would not be attending and invited others from her “B List” in their place.  She was unpleasantly surprised upon arrival at the reception to discover that many of those people who didn’t RSVP showed up and there weren’t enough tables, chairs, or meals. It was a very awkward situation, and she spent the first 20-30 minutes of her reception talking to the venue coordinator about options. The venue eventually set up additional tables and chairs (the linens did not match the custom ones she had rented, of course), but even after that, there still wasn’t enough food.

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