(Closed) Opinions Please! Wedding Shower AFTER Destination Wedding

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: How would you feel about being invited to attend a wedding shower that takes place AFTER a DW?
    I would be ok with it : (14 votes)
    26 %
    I hate the idea : (37 votes)
    70 %
    Other - I will explain below : (2 votes)
    4 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    77 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: July 2013

    I think that would be perfectly fine! As long, as everyone is invited to the reception!

    Post # 4
    Member
    307 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: March 2014

    I’m not American so showers sit a little off with me anyway, but I would definately feel like you were just after extra presents.

    If your family or BM’s really insisted on throwing you one I think a small one would be OK, but I would be uncomfortable being invited otherwise.

    Post # 6
    Member
    2715 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    Are all the guests also invited to the DW?  It’s the wedding all guests need to be invited to; not the reception. 

    Unless there was an extenuating circumstance – illness, deployment, travel limitations, or some sort of emergency – I probably wouldn’t go to the shower.  I think it comes off as greedy – like you were impatient to get married so you had a very short engagement, but you wanted all the parties too.  Bascially, it says that you want to have your cake and eat it too and I don’t like that attitude.

    ETA: Just saw the update that it isn’t for you.  When is the Destination Wedding though?  You don’t need more than a month or two to plan a shower, so I find it hard to believe that there isn’t enough time to plan one.

    Post # 8
    Member
    3039 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    @clairebear000: +1. It just seems very greedy to me.

    Post # 9
    Member
    6123 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: August 2012

    @Happy2bMrs:  Are all the AHR guests also invited to the wedding?  Or is the wedding just a small group?

    Post # 10
    Member
    8695 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: September 2013

    I wouldnt go

    Post # 13
    Member
    6123 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: August 2012

    @Happy2bMrs:  I would say being that there is already two events (the wedding and the AHR), adding a third event like a shower for a select few women seems kind of like too many events where gifts would be brought to. 

    I’m not sure the after the wedding/before the AHR bothers me (because changing the order to what we’re all accustomed to wouldn’t bat an eye), but it’s too many events and a burden on the guests to have to consider what to give a gift to and what to not.

    I’m guessing you’re the Maid/Matron of Honor who is left with planning a shower?

    Post # 14
    Member
    2715 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    @Happy2bMrs:  Good to know that all guests are invited to the Destination Wedding.  But how long as the Destination Wedding been planned?  Still seems strange that there wasn’t enough time to throw a shower beforehand.  Did the couple have to have a short engagement?

    Also, I would go to the AHR and if I didn’t attend the Destination Wedding, I would bring a gift.

    Post # 15
    Member
    8695 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: September 2013

    @Happy2bMrs:  maybe but it depends on how close I am to the person. If it isnt a close friend or immediate family member then I wouldnt go to the AHR either. How many different events does one need? Seriously, it would annoy me.

    The topic ‘Opinions Please! Wedding Shower AFTER Destination Wedding’ is closed to new replies.

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