Mr TTR & I were friends first (actually we had mutual friends… and just got assimilated into a bigger group of friends… mostly couples, but a few single folks as well in this circle). So we knew a fair bit about each other / and our values going in.
When we began dating, on our first few dates we had a lot of very very deep discussions… and covered a lot of territory on what flew with each of us in a romantic relationship and what wouldn’t
Then again, we are both older (40s & 50s when we met) and both had suffered thru the pain of divorce. We were very gun shy about getting involved with the “wrong” person, and getting hurt
So we spent inordinate amounts of time talking about ourselves, our lives, and our expectations in regards to dating
Boundaries was certainly one of those talks.
At our age we both seen a lot of life, and we’ve seen a lot of friendships develop in more… Temptation happens
And more often than not, Cheating & Affairs occurs with people you know, not complete strangers
Emotional Cheating (sharing inappropriate information) is often where it starts… and then that leads to more inappropriate behaviour
Hence, the one way to protect a relationship is to understand that concept, and to agree not to see a member of the opposite sex for friendship… alone one on one
Easy enough. We hang out as couples or as a group. I don’t spend one on one time alone with any guys… and he doesn’t the same with any women
Lol, between our own busy lives (work – sports – home – interests – obligations) – our time for each other – time with other couples – and time with our “gang” of friends… we don’t miss any solo time with members of the opposite sex.
Works for us.