(Closed) opposite sex gender friendships prior to your relationship/marriage from hs/uni

posted 5 years ago in Relationships
  • poll: would you keep opposite sex friends prior to your so or after you met your so/after married
    totally : (113 votes)
    81 %
    only ones prior to my so as in before i met my so : (9 votes)
    6 %
    only ones prior and friends from highschool/college if not prior : (6 votes)
    4 %
    no opposie sex friendships : (12 votes)
    9 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    621 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: November 2012

    @outgoingcutie15:  I see no problem with opposite sex friendships in healthy, open, communicative relationships. People with trust issues may feel otherwise.

    I dont have really any straight male friends, but my husband has female friends from high school that he still communicates with and we all hang out together. No biggie

    Post # 4
    Member
    770 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    If getting married meant losing half my friends, I’d stay single.

    Post # 5
    Member
    4803 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    Most definitely.  I would and have done so.

    Post # 6
    Member
    1406 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: November 2011

    I’ve been out of HS for a longgg time now but I’m FB friends w/my old guy friends. I also live 6k miles away from any of them so I never see them….I’m sure it might be different if we were in the same city.

    DH’s personal belief is that guys cannot be friends w/girls…I disagree but that’s his belief so he has NO female friends. He has LOTS of male friends from HS though that he remains in contact with. 

     

    Post # 7
    Member
    9648 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: April 2019

    I see nothing wrong with keeping friendships with the opposite sex from both before and after meeting SO, but I disagree with hanging out with a member of the opposite sex alone, one on one. But I definitely think you can still be friends

    Post # 8
    Member
    1098 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: December 2013

    Just because I’m married doesn’t mean I suddenly can’t be friends with men. 

    Post # 9
    Member
    930 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    Why would I dump half my friends when I get married?

     My best friend from high school is a man, there has never been anything romantic about our relationship and that is never going to change.  (we live in separate states now, and only see each other around holidays, with our significant others, we’ll talk on the phone every few weeks yet)

    Post # 10
    Member
    965 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2015

    @Jacqui90:  Why do you think that men/women friendships shouldn’t be in one on one situations out of interest? 

    Post # 11
    Member
    514 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    My opinion on this is, that those who don’t think it is appropriate, they themselves cannot be trusted as they don’t trust themselves to have a purely platonic friendship.

    We both have many friends of the opposite sex we hang out with one on one, as a group or as couples.

    Post # 12
    Member
    691 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    If I couldn’t trust my guy to hang out with a woman and not keep his pants on I simply wouldn’t marry him.

    Post # 13
    Member
    7403 posts
    Busy Beekeeper

    I will keep all my past friendships and continue to make new ones even after im married.

    Post # 14
    Member
    9648 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: April 2019

    @PenguinLove:  I have no issue with it when single, it is just an almost date like situation for a man and woman to hang out alone, it is fine for other couples, just not for Fiance and I.

     

    ETA: For those who say it is a lack of trust, it isn’t for us at all. We trust each other 100%, know we would never cheat on each other or hurt each other in any way. We just don’t hang out alone with someone of the opposite sex

    And to be honest in the beginning of our relationship I was ok with him hanging out alone with female friends. But then he stayed over at a mutual friend’s house, and slept on her bed with her instead of on the couch. I don’t see it as cheating but I was upset about it for a very long time. We have moved past it but now only hang out with members of the opposite sex in groups.

    Post # 15
    Member
    965 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2015

    @Jacqui90:  no disrespect meant, if you works for you and Fiance when that’s fine, I guess I’m so use to having male friends around and going out for dinner/lunch with them one on one that I don’t think it weird or whatever. 

    Post # 16
    Member
    4524 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: September 2014

    @Jacqui90:  I dont think you’re weird: we have had zero questionable incidents with opposite sex friends and we *still* do that stuff together.

     

    It’s not like we have some policy on it, it really has never been an issue: he’s never had a female friend not invite us BOTH out and I’ve never had a male friend not invite us BOTH out.  Knowing him, if a female friend invited just him out, he’d still expect me to go, since thats what he does when males ask him out.

     

    But yeah, it’s never come up so I dont know how it would play out, I can only assume.

    The topic ‘opposite sex gender friendships prior to your relationship/marriage from hs/uni’ is closed to new replies.

    Find Amazing Vendors