(Closed) Opps…. I quit my job….

posted 5 years ago in Career
Post # 76
Member
5365 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2016

I hope your daughter gets better and yall can figure out her situation. I’m so tired of the bees ganging up on others. Good luck OP, you’ll be fine!

Post # 77
Member
723 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

Yeesh people, lay off.

OP, I’m sorry it got to the point where you felt like your only option was to quit. You must’ve been horribly stressed & overworked.

If there’s anything to be learned from this, it’s maybe learning to work on setting boundaries so as not to get to that breaking point again–to recognize the series of red flags that say “take some time for yourself! use your vacation days!” before the nuclear option of quitting. That said, my thoughts are with you & I hope you’re able to get the rest and support that you need! Good luck finishing up school–you’re so close!

Post # 78
Member
5219 posts
Bee Keeper

What’s done is done, you cannot un-do the situation. There’s no scenario where you can go back and tell your husband your intentions before you quit.

Since you said that you do feel some regrets, I would suggest reading up on personal time management some. Feeling overwhelmed because of work/school/kids/responsibilities is tough, but somehow, most people people try and figure it out the best they can. I get it, you quit– yet you have savings, you have a career path in mind that isn’t contingent upon this job, and you’re at the end of the line school wise. However; that may not always be the case. I would at the very least, assure your SO that this is not a behavior you’re prepared to repeat (quitting without talking with him) and that these were unusual circumstances.

 

Still, I would be prepared for him to be pissed. I would imagine 99.9% of people would have some feelings of anger knowing that their partner just quit on a whim without talking to them first. It minimizes the importance of their feedback and input, and that can cause hurt feelings and lack of trust. 

Post # 79
Member
2670 posts
Sugar bee

The sound you hear is me shaking my head that an adult with three children, one whom appears to be very ill, ups and quits her job without giving her SO any input.

 

Post # 80
Member
3229 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

PeachyMama:  I suggest you call your old employer up and get that serving job ASAP and then call your Fiance with your backup plan.  Savings are just that.  They are not for throwing caution to the wind just because.  I’ve done this in the past, but I was young, dumb, and did not have kids.  I would NEVER do this now.  I understand life is tough, but it will get rougher for the kids and your Fiance if you do not do something quick.

  • This reply was modified 4 years, 6 months ago by  NovaRising.
Post # 82
Member
1289 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

PeachyMama:  so glad to hear everything worked out! Enjoy the weekend with your family because really, at the end of the day, that’s all that really matters.

Post # 83
Member
2393 posts
Buzzing bee

PeachyMama:  

Bees, this is what true love and understanding looks like. … I was falling and he caught me. With loving arms.

 

Awwww…. he had the coffee ready for you and everything. I love this.

I think the key to this whole situation that a lot of people missed, is that you two are in a financial position where this is not a big deal. Obviously if you were teetering on the edge of financial collapse, you wouldn’t have done this.

Last year I also quit a toxic job with crazy hours and switched to a part-time, more fun job. It was a huge pay cut but Darling Husband wanted me to quit because I was miserable. We are in a solid position financially and don’t need my income anyway. 

The other day I saw my supervisor and asked to have my hours cut even more so that I can get to the Y earlier in the day. I didn’t run it by Darling Husband first because I knew he wouldn’t care. And he doesn’t.

You’re going to love the extra time! Glad to hear everything worked out. 

 

Post # 84
Member
10664 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: City, State

Well, he’s a keeper for sure.  Glad to hear your SO was so sweet & supportive.

Post # 85
Member
3838 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2007 - City, State

PeachyMama:  I knew he would be okay… I’m so happy you told him. Now enjoy this all!! And have fun at the movies today! LoL

Post # 86
Member
1479 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

gingerminty:  Nailed it!

 

I have been in this exact situation. You get to a point where you aren’t going to be miserable for one more second. Quitting allows you to be a human and its instant relief. Good for you for recognizing what you needed to do for yourself. Don’t listen to anyone that tells you what you did was wrong. They aren’t in your shoes and what works for them might not be what works for you. 

 

Enjoy your weekend with your family!

Post # 87
Member
1910 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: February 2015

I’m glad things worked out for you. My only concern, as many PP mentioned was that you didn’t consult with him first. It’s good that things turned out well, but that’s not always a guarantee. So please before things get too stressful, let him know your thoughts before making a major decision. Enjoy the movie!

Post # 89
Member
1403 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

Best of luck!

Post # 90
Member
4029 posts
Honey bee

PeachyMama:  Glad things worked out. But I still disagree.

Personally, true love is turning to your partner when times are tough and they are your first confidant. It’s great he was ok with the way you handled it. But the fact that you kept it from him and didn’t even think to talk to him before that big of decision does not compute to “true love.”  People were coming from that perspective when providing feedback. No fleeting moment of love being tossed into the wind.

That may be your version of a “healthy” relationship, but I would bet many, many people would tend to communicate with their partner about major decisions. After all, marriage is about building and maintaining a life together. It is about approaching and tackling life’s obstacles together. It’s about finding a way to work through difficult situations and experience life’s joys together. That is accomplished by actually making decisions together.

But, whatever…it worked out for you. Best of luck in figuring out the rest.

ETA: Edited to more clearly define this is “my definition.” Just as you have your definition of true love, we have varying versions. 

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