Oral Herpes outbreak

posted 3 years ago in Emotional
Post # 2
Member
295 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2019

Hi,

I’m sorry you’re going through this! It’s always an anxious time and the uncertainty is a killer. Have you had your mouth sores confirmed by your GP as well? They may be able to prescribe some medicine for you to reduce the symptoms.

Go down to your GP with hubby if he starts developing symptoms… Itchiness, sores, burning when urinating, redness and swollen penis.

I have genital herpes. I gave it to my Dear Fiance when we started TTC. Because we spoke about it openly and honestly, we both knew the risk of contraction.

Ultimately, yes the virus stays with you for the entirety of your life. It’s unpredictable when it can rear its ugly head again, but generally speaking, times of high stress/illness/being run down can be the high risk times.

Thinking of you both.

Post # 4
Member
295 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2019

Go see your GP first. Get yourself confirmed and some medicines to take the pain/discomfort away, and reduce the time it takes to heal. Have a frank discussion with your hubby even before you go to the doctor – let him know that you *may* have an outbreak, but you’re getting it confirmed by the GP, and that there may be a possibility that he may have it now (eiether genitally, or orally if you’ve kissed/shared toothbrushes/drinks etc).

Ease up on the flossing/brushing too. That will just make the inflammation worse. Antiseptic is fine, just use it as it says on the bottle.

At the end of the day, I’ll be frank – shit happens. You didn’t go in with the intention of giving him anything, nor did you think of or know that you had an outbreak. I sincerely hope that he is understanding of this, if it is herpes.

Keep us posted. Take care.

Post # 6
Member
295 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2019

View original reply
mrsrod7 :  OK good, so he’s pretty chilled out about it, it sounds like. My other half was very chilled about it, and I hated myself for a while afterwards, even though he knew the risks.

It will go away on its own, but it takes longer. I guess it’s up to you if you are happy to ride it out, or if you want to cut it short. I’m not sure how far along into the outbreak you are, or when you received the script for the antis but depending on how long the outbreak has been around for, it may be worthwhile just riding the rest out.

Warm salted water is also really helpful too. It helps to dry out the sores and is a great antiseptic. Just don’t drink it. *gags*

Post # 7
Member
2693 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2017

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mrsrod7 :  I don’ know anything about herpes…..but I have had 2 root canals made necessary by a childhood bicycle accident…..so I will advise you that if you have a lump on your gums and a swollen lip you maybe want to go have a dental xray as it might be an abesses and you might need a root canal.

Post # 8
Member
970 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

im sure it would take a week or so to notice on ur mans thing. when i was preg my gums got really swollen too and i was told it was horomones. double check to be safe,

sending hugs!

Post # 11
Member
295 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2019

View original reply
mrsrod7 :  Oh hun, I’m sorry πŸ™ That feeling of guilt is horrendous… Please be kind to yourself – there’s nothing that could’ve been done, and it didn’t mean to happen. *huge hugs* I do strongly recommend that he sees the GP as well as you; particularly if he’s on other medicines or has other health conditions that may interact with the antivirals or the herpes. As for getting type 2, yep that is now a risk and one you’re going to have to way up – particularly now that you’re TTC (I mean unprotected sex).

Be prepared that he’ll have welts develop on his penis which then progress to scabby looking things, and eventually they go away.  They may become painful and he may swell too. Salt sitz baths will be his best friend. Tell him strinctly to wash his hands after peeing/touching himself (like most blokes do absentmindedly) and change his jocks/keep his groin dry, which minimises transmission to other people by shaking hands etc and also promotes healing by using basic hygiene.

I’ve been dealing with this bastard since I was 14 and I am now in my late 20s. And I’m a healthcare professional. So any questions, ask away.

Hugs again.

Post # 13
Member
184 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2017

Relax. That is my best advice. My hubby has 1 & 2. He told me long ago & I decided that contracting is a risk I’m willing to take. My hubby is very careful when he has a breakout. No kissing or oral sex if it’s an oral outbreak & no sex if it’s genital. Apply abreva at THE FIRST SIGN of an oral outbreak & a few times a day. He describes it as a tingling sensation when an outbreak is happening. He does that every time & the sore doesn’t even open. Don’t pick at it. Every time you touch it, wash your hands. My hubs does well on the antivirals for 2. Try not to beat yourself up about it. Sending hugs πŸ€— 

Post # 14
Member
34 posts
Newbee

I am so sorry you are going though this. Speaking from experience, just because he has it genitally does not mean it is Type 2. You can contract Type 1 (oral herpes) on your genitals from oral sex. It is unfortunate but it happened to me. The good news is, type 1 genital outbreaks are typically WAY less frequent because type 1 strain prefers the oral region of the body. Also, If you have it orally, it is extremely unlikely that he will now pass it to you genitally because once you have it, your body begins to build immunities to it which means over time outbreaks get less and less frequent. I found out I had genital type 1 about 8 months ago and have not experienced another outbreak since then. I did extensive internet research after I was diagnosed and I felt horrible/sad although my partner felt worse for passing it to me. Luckily, we are in a position where we intend to spend the rest of our lives together so that took some of the burden off me. From what I can gather, maky people who has type 1 genitally rarely experience more than 1 outbreak per year, some never have another after their primary outbreak.

This actually took a lot of courage for me to write and no one knows this about me other than my parnter. I hope I was able to bring you some piece of mind. You will get throught this I promise.

Type 2 is a different strain and the one that is considered o be the STD, although you can get both genitally. 

 

Post # 15
Member
34 posts
Newbee

Bee I am so sorry you are going through this. Speaking from experience, just because he now has it genitally does not mean that it is type 2. Yuou can contract type 1 ( oral herpes) genitally through oral sex. It is unfortunate but it happened to me. 

When I found out I was devistated and my partener felt horribly guilty as we were always super careful. After doing extensive research on the internet, I was able to find a silver lining. Genital outbreaks of type 1 are WAY less frequent becuase this strain prefers the oral region of the body. From what I read, fery vew people with type 1 genital herpes had more than 1 outbreak a year, and many haven’t had a second outbreak at all.

Also, if you have it orally, and he has it genitally, (assuming that both of you have type 1) it is unlikely that you will also contract it genitally becuse your body has now built up imminuties to it since it is already in your body.

This is a terrible thing to go through and this was etremely difficult for me to write as I have not told anyone about this other than my partner. I hope that you can find comfort in this and know that everything will be ok. 

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