- 10 years ago
Someone please help and give me some advice.
I have always dreamt about an engagement with Mr. Right since I was a little girl. Well, Mr. Right finally came, however, with baggage. He was married before and I thought I can overlooked some things but I couldn’t, at least not about his wedding and marriage in the past. Though it’s a bad marriage and it only lasted a course of less than a year and it was before me, I do always wonder about it and how much he truly loves me. Some guys wanted to marry me in the past, but I said no to them bc I wanted to wait. Now this great guy comes along… first, it bothers me that he didn’t wait for me. Ok, maybe my demands are all a fairy tale I dreamt up when I was little, so get over it right!? Well I have.
The problem: He worked me up to a very nice engagement…he told me that he had something great planned when he does ask me. He tells me over and over he knows that that’s all girls talk about so he has something great under his sleeve. He knows my position in that it is important to me for a nice proposal than a huge rock.
What actually happened: he asked me the same day he had gotten the ring. He took the day off bc he was doing construction in his condo. He didn’t planned anything. He asked me while we were getting ready to go to bed while his entire condo was a mess from the construction. He didn’t seem like he was emotional when he had asked. He didn’t think to spend the entire weekend with me bc he had to finish the construction the next day. I cried. He worked me up and he didn’t give me a proposal that only had me in mind, making me feel special. I thought about his last engagement with the ex and I thought he planned more with her than me. HE told me it’s bc he was excited about giving me a ring and he thought that nothing else mattered. I thought nothing else…not even how I felt about an engagement? For most ppl this only happens once in their lifetime or at most once in the relationship.
It’s been six months since hs proposal…I still am very upset over it. I don’t have doubts about being iwth him but I am upset that he didn’t make an effort to make me feel special at all. He is asking me to be his wife and shouldn’t he make an effort to make me feel great about it?..and not make me feel that I should bc he spent money on a ring? I know if I stay with him I have to get over it. The question is, can I stay with him if I am so upset about it? I even begin to question our relationship bc the proposal is wrong…if it were right shouldn’t I have a great feeling about it everytime I think of our proposal? Give me some tips, advice etc.? Please!!!