Our first RSVP mishap… and I am SO confused! 😂

posted 7 months ago in Guests
Post # 31
153 posts
Blushing bee

Does the friend have a wife/partner, perhaps, who received the invitation, mentioned to the friend that they would RSVP, and your friend just assumed it was a paper reply card and didn’t want to act like he hadn’t actually seen the invitation? 

Post # 32
11273 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2009

carolinabelle : cltbride : bayoubee :  and weddingmaven :  all provided the response that I was going to provide. What your FI’s friend did isn’t odd at all. It just sounds as if he is following formal, traditional etiquette regarding accepting an invitation.

More than 20 years ago, one of my friends didn’t send response cards with her wedding invitations, either. That’s where I learned of this truth. I was too concerned that most of my guests wouldn’t know to do this, so I included formal, engraved response cards and return envelopes with stamps in my invitation suite. However, I did not send those items to the friend who didn’t send them to me. Sure enough, I received her handwritten note accepting my invitation. 🙂

Post # 33
5182 posts
Bee Keeper

underblueskies1016 :  

Not really bizarre  at  all, just a bit old school and actually , completely correct.

Post # 34
431 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

underblueskies1016 :  in the U.K. It’s common to buy a card / write a letter to accept or decline a wedding invitation. Card shops sell special cards for the purpose. Even with an online rsvp people here would go and get a card to send. 

Post # 35
6715 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: July 2016

How long do you think it typically takes for mail to get from your friend’s address to yours?

I can’t wait to find out what he sent, if anything.

I have to say my initial thought was what some PPs are saying–he simply is following traditional etiquette.. but mixing up your wedding with someone else’s or misplacing the invite and not wanting to fess up both seem perfectly plausible too!

Post # 36
435 posts
Helper bee

If this is in the US, I don’t picture almost any guy going and writing something down on paper or a special card and mailing it to rsvp. I’d love to hear what happens.

Post # 38
582 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2018

Well that’s a disappointing update. I was thinking you might get the invitation back in the mail.

Post # 40
6715 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: July 2016

underblueskies1016 :  lol! how odd.

I imagine he must have sent an RSVP to (and gone to) someone elses wedding.. and then mistakenly messaged your FI about it?  No idea!

Post # 41
1352 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2015 - Holly Hedge Estate

underblueskies1016 :  That is so strange that he didn’t show up to the wedding! WTH? Especially after what you described as a very excited phone call about attending. Has your DH talked with him since that first phone call?

Post # 42
291 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2017

That is tooo strange. Thanks for the update. 

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