- 5 years ago
a while back ago i mentioned how i wrote an article for our wedding planner and in return, she offered to help plan our wedding.*
at the time, i wrote for an exclusive magazine and did a really nice write up on a planner i had found. we decided that we were going to postpone the wedding before i decided to pitch the article, so it was me really just being genuine when i brought her on board. i interviewed her, wrote the article and when she wasnt happy with the way she answered the questions, i offered to give her an extension. after the article came out, she was ecstatic and told me that she wanted to help plan my wedding (if we were still going through with it) and that i would just have to pay her assistants. awesome! after thinking long and hard about it, we finally told her that yes, we would start planning again and that we would love her help.
prior to all this, i had already started my vendor search and efforts. so when we came together, all the big stuff was taken care of and it was just the tying of the loose ends that needed work. well, as i started to get overwhelmed by planning, i reached out to her and she would help me here and there. i was annoyed that she didnt help me out as much as she led me to believe from the get-go, but whatever, i dealt with it. then, the months started to pass and i freaked out. i told her that i had nightmares and she agreed to meet with me. we met and it was ok. she seemed disorganized, flippant and basically just went over everything i had already figured out. she also told me that we would be meeting 3-4 times more over the course of the next month. i told her that we could pay her and that i felt more comfortable signng a contract–something to solidify her duties. she brushed me off. after that meeting, i started looking for other planners but i felt like i was betraying her, so it was a no-go.
after that, she was non-existent. i had to be the one to initiate emails and go over check lists. we never met 3-4 times after that meeting (we only met once the thursday before my wedding). i called her a couple weeks before the wedding because we had no timeline and all my vendors were asking for it. we sat on the phone and made one in 30 mins. this to me said “i could have done this for your earlier, but i was just too lazy”. some of my vendors even quetsioned if i really had a planner. the weekend before our wedding, i texted her to see when a good time to talk about final details would be, and she told me that she was going out of town and wouldnt be getting reception. thats all good and fine, but with my wedding coming up, an email at the beginning of the week w/what was left to do would have been appreciated. she told me that she would send me some seating chart templates around 5 days before the wedding. never happened. i had to scramble with the girl who designed our invitations to make table numbers and escort cards in time.
oh man, so the day of….thats where things get awful. the timeline was so off that the videographer showed up before i even started getting ready. like our makeup and hair people werent even there yet. he told me that she hadnt responded to any emails and that she only got in touch with him at 9pm the night before! my mom and i dont even have photos together because she was too busy at our home working on the generator. isnt that the assistants job? after the ceremony, MY CAR IS SITTING IN THE DRIVEWAY. yes. my car is sitting in the driveway next to the cocktail hour and a beautiful tented reception with swagging and chandeliers. it hadnt even been washed! i was mortified. i wanted to scream! when i asked her why it was there, she said, no one could find the keys..ok, so why didnt your two assistants call you close to showtime to let you know that a white, unwashed car was sitting in the middle of cocktail hour?? i mean RIGHT?!
since the wedding was at my parents home, they had their dogs there. two of the dogs got out because she went into the library looking for god knows what. so there i am, in my wedding dress, holding my 25lbs black dog against my beautiful white gown. we ran out of tequila by 6pm (we got the amount she suggested) and when i told her to send one of her assistants, she told me they were underage! so she sent the gentleman from the photo booth! yes. another guest told me that she sat on her phone while tables were waiting to be called up for their food (buffet). he said, “i was starving and she just sat on her phone with no line!” my sister had to call to find where my cake was when it hadnt been delivered by 6:15. she told me that we would have sparklers and that she would just get them through amazon prime, “not a problem!” we didnt have sparklers. i wanted pillar candles everywhere, “not a problem!” we didnt have pillar candles.
and the kicker? she is asking me to pay her assistants $200 each. my husband saw pictures of the photo booth sessions and asked who these guests were. they were the assistants. he didnt even recognize them. i am thinking of just giving them $100 each and writing her a letter stating why, but i dont know if i should just let it all go? what would you do? im furious with her-mostly because we offered to pay her to essentially do a better job and she totally blew me off. we cant go back in time and i feel like i didnt get enough photos with family because i spent about 20 mins crying, inside my parents home. we live in a very exclusive area and she is a well known planner. i cannot imagine paying for this shit like the other brides. UGH. thank you for letting me vent.