Post # 1
So my Fiance and I are getting married in 4 weeks. So a month basically. And I STILL need to pay off the venue. We’ve been putting our heads together for days to try to figure things out. First a big bonus that I was expecting and have gotten every year faithfully was cut by $2k in February. Then my SO switched one of his jobs that was allowing him to work OT which was helping with the extra money but then they cut his hours down to completely off. I cannot decrease the number of my guest list as part of the contract. I only contracted for 80 people because I could always go up (expected 100). My venue is set to seat 88 and food costs cover 80. So that is the minimum. Right now I have RSVP for about 70. So I’m sure we’ll meet our minimum. I can’t change the date due to travel arrangements for guests and honeymoon already paid for.
My last venue payment was due this week and I simply do not have it and don’t know any options to get the money. The venue has allowed me an extra couple weeks to pay them off. My mom has helped out a lot with items, my fixed income grandma has even pitched in. It feels like I still have so much to pay for with no money. I’m getting depressed. The only thing I can think of is a payday loan which is a death trap to me because of interest. But I wouldn’t want to get it now because I don’t want to have to pay it back B4 the wedding. Personal loan is a no because I graduated last year and now student loans have kicked in (which I’ve deferred) so I haven’t even started to pay them yet. I’m sure no one is going to want to give me more money.
What I have left: Food balance, photographer, videographer (cheap/friendor), flower girl/ring bearer attire, our rings, lighting, Bridesmaid or Best Man gifts, and favors.
Pretty much everything is paid for and/or booked. It just a matter of paying the balances. Doesn’t seem like a whole lot but when you add up the cost GEESH!
Kind words please anyone. Ideas. Brides who have gone through or know someone who had gone through a similiar situation and how they handled it. HELP PLEASE!!!! I don’t want to go into my day stressed and depressed. This is suppose to be a happy time!
Post # 3
Would you have time to take a part-time side job on the weekends only/evenings?
Looking at what you have left, what I would consider doing: asking flower girl/ring bearer’s parents if they could provide their outfits (and allow them to pick out something in your wedding colors on their own), gently let your bridesmaids know you love them but their gifts will be a little late (after the wedding) when you have time to recover financially, lighting – ask yourself if this is REALLY necessary, and favors – I’d eliminate them all together.
I know this is a terrible thing to suggest, but would your venue allow a credit card payment for the balance? I mean if worse came to worse, it would be better to use a credit card/personal loan then to lose everything. Just a thought.
I’m sending you lots of good luck thoughts!!
Post # 4
skip the favors too, they won’t be missed.
maybe get “stand-in” rings for cheap for the ceremony and wait until you’ve recovered financially to get your permanent bands?
Post # 5
I’m sorry you are going through this, but you are not the first one who has had this problem. I guess my solutions depend on hwo much money you owe…i.e. if you still owe $10,000…well, I think you need to seriously re-think some of your costs and figure out where to cut back.
But if you owe $1000 or less – one option would be to put it on a credit card – not ideal, but if you have no CC debt, it should be easy to pay off within a few months after the wedding.
Or – can you sell items? Do you have old gold jewelry that you could part with? What about stuff on craig’s list? When I was a grad student and needed a few extra $$ (like, less than $100) to see me through the month, I would sell items I was no longer using…like my papasan chair, my exercise ball, etc. I even sold my entertainment center (and just used an old table I had for my TV).
Can you put a temp hold on your internet and/or cable service? This should net you a few extra $$ in your budget.
Another option….can you sell plasma? (Not ideal, I know……) But (again, as a poor grad student) I sold my plasma twice a week for two months to buy an Ipod.
Or – do you belong to a church community? Can you ask if anyone needs to hire help around the house? When my dad got laid off, he found temp work fixing up this lady’s house and replacing her barn doors.
Post # 6
Post # 7
I second getting a part-time gig to help with extra money. But I wouldn’t bother with applying for something. Do you have any skills that you can sell like doing hair, babysitting, dog walking? I used to make quite the killing in college blowing out hair for $15 – 20 a pop. You’d be surprised how many people want straight hait but can’t do it themselves.
Post # 8
@Luv2BeachIt: The ring bearer is my son! 🙂 So no way around that…he’s actually probably walking me down the aisle now because my dad flaked on helping so my mom and I are really mad at him and we haven’t spoken in months. Never had a good relationship with him anyway. The flower girl both of her parents are in the wedding. So we promised from the beginning to purchase her attire. I felt it is only fair since the two of them had to purchase their own. I’m going cheap on her attire from a local store been shopping around. Same with the favors very cheap. I really want the lighting and have contracted already 🙁 it’s only $400 (pretty cheap compared to what I’m hearing)
We don’t have credit cards. Everything on the list is cheap actually. I shopped around, google, etsy, DIY, bargaing, craigslist, EVERYTHING for this weddding. The biggest thing is the food balance $2k. If I could get that paid the rest is okay. Thank you so much! 🙂 I’m praying.
@MrsJazzy: good idea for the stand in rings…
Post # 9
@Rock Hugger: Awesome advice! I have tons of shoes I’m thinking about selling…Already doing the cable thing this month 🙂 Thought about garage sale and pawning whatever I could find.
Everything together is about $4k…more than half is the food…I should have maybe close to half of it between my next paychecks before the wedding.
Post # 10
I agree with Jody23. Your bridesmaids will understand. Talk to them and write each of them a nice card as a gift for now. If the ring bearer’s parents can’t buy/rent/borrow a suit, could you skip having them in the wedding? I say skip the favors all together-I don’t think people will care, many won’t even notice. Could you buy inexpensive wedding bands or even stand ins for now and upgrade later? The most important thing right now is getting money payed to the venue. I don’t know if it’s catering/venue combined, but maybe you could skip on one of the appetizers or downgrade the meal to bring down the bill. Don’t worry-you will figure it out! Pay the venue first, then number each thing as a priority and buy them as you can and skip what you can.
Post # 11
Sell everything you can on CL…clothes you don’t wear (especially kid’s clothes), furniture, electronics, jewelry…everything you can get your hands on to sell-do it!
Post # 12
@VegasSukie: Oh good ideas! I pay people $50+ for them to watch my dog overnight (let my dog stay in their home). Side jobs like these can end up bringing in some good cash!
@PrettySedity: How cute! Well at least your son will be well-dressed. 🙂 Again, hate to even say this, but worst case scenario, since neither of you have credit cards, you should consider opening one for the balance (if the venue allows). There are so many cards out there that offer 0% interest for the first year. So you’d have a year to pay it off with no fees or interest. Last case… don’t do this unless you HAVE to. Praying, too! 🙂
Post # 13
@PrettySedity: Look at unorthodox places for RB/FG clothes. We bought ours from Kohls. Flower Girl dress was $30 and Ring Bearer four piece suit was $15 on clearance.
Stand in rings are a great idea. It sounds dumb, but WalMart sells sterling bands for $15–FI and I wore ours in the summer when we are at camp and don’t want to wear our pretty rings. Zales also has pretty silver and sapphire rings that might be able to work as stand ins.
Cut the favors, no one will miss them.
Tell the bridesmaids there gifts are coming, I think they’ll understand, or at least they should if they’re friends.
It’s always the little things that add up to a lot. We paid off our big things first and are now left trying to sort out the little things.
Post # 14
I’d look carefully into using credit cards — most of my vendors tack on huge fees for using them (my caterer had a 4.5% additional charge for any credit card payments). Just FYI.
Definitely cut the favors, standin rings, explain to your BMs and promise them a fun night out on you once you’ve recovered the cost of the wedding. Contact your vendors and explain the situation, see if you can cut things out to lower the prices. Cut back the number of hours of photography, and honestly, I’d cut the videographer all together (unless your friendor is giving you a fantastic deal).
Post # 15
you have gotten some great leads so far. I would check out the ‘gigs’ section of craigs list, there are often times people who need a few hours of manual labor for cash, either you or your Fiance could do this easy if its just the right gig.
1.odd jobs – gigs section of craigs list
2. sell unwanted items and things that you know you are going to get replacements of after the wedding anyways
3. cut cable, internet, and downgrade cell phones (my cell carrier lets me down grade to just text/calling plan for a month if cash is tight and then upgrade to data again later) saves $80
4. Ask flower girls to provide thier own dress (after easter sales are going to be your friend)
5. cheap stand in tungsten rings (you can get 2 bands from JVL for 100 with shipping and they will be there fast no problem) Buy more expensive ones with diamonds and what not later and you can still use these as your ‘play’ rings when you are on vacation and don’t want to take the real ones
6. skip the favors, no one will notice and some people might thank you for not having them.
7. with a month out you obviously can’t change to just cake and punch at this point but if you splurged on anything on food ask your caterer if they can down grade (fewer specialty desserts? less fancy side or salad?) No one is going to notice again
8. Write each of your girls a really sweet heart felt letter on fancy stationary and promise them a girls day out in the future give them thier Bridesmaid or Best Man gift then, I am sure they will understand
Other thoughts, is lighting really necessary? do you have any decor items you haven’t used that can be returned to the store? can your flowers be downgraded to a cheaper option?
Hope you figure it out, best of luck!
Post # 16
My BM’s are not getting their gifts till after the wedding because 1. the finances and 2. I wanted to give them something meaningful, so I am making them a photo album from the minute I asked them to be my bm’s up until the wedding day when we will take our last photo together.
we are also doing stand in rings, that cut our cost at least $1000
I did way with favors also, the only favor they will get is a blank CD/DVD that im putting on the tables, so if they take pics or video they can download them to that and send back to me which is also taking care of my videographer and less time for the photographer being there.