(Closed) Out of state wedding

posted 6 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
13010 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I live in DC, all my family is in MA, and FI’s family is split between NY and FL.  The wedding is in DC, so I’m in basically the same situation as you.  I’m just telling myself, those who matter will come, and that will make the day worth it.

Post # 6
Member
13010 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

@SizzleC:  We are starting to plan.  I work full time and am in grad school too, so basically the months January-May, June, and September – December aren’t very useable in terms of planning since I’m constantly in the library.  So a few extra months is necessary for me! 🙂

It sounds like your Fiance has a great attitude about the guest list!  He knows the important thing is the girl walking down the aisle to him!

Post # 7
Member
3176 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

We had a similar situation. We are from two different states a plane ride away from each other, either way one side would have to travel so we got married in our college town where we met (3 hours away from his family, 14 hours from mine). It turned out great and I was really overwhelmed by how many people wanted to come and participate.

Post # 9
Member
315 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 1997

@SizzleC:  I have in the past and this year is the same. I will be doing a lot of wedding where the couples are from other states or other countries.  Some couples do it to have a small intimate ceremony, with only the witnesses I provide (my state requires 2 witnesses). Some have just a handful come to witness and share their day. But none of them so far have been sorry for having their wedding where they wanted it. Or if they have they have fooled me very well by looking happy, excited and seeming to having tons of fun.

I understand that you feel your Fiance will be missing out by not having a single family member at the ceremony. However, I think he looks at it differently. I bet he thinks that he is marrying the most beautiful, wonderful and totally terrific person on this planet and he doesn’t care about anything else but becoming your dear sweet and wonderful Hubby.

 

 

Post # 10
Member
753 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

Yup. We’re in Richmond and the ceremony is up in Buffalo NY where all my family is. I don’t really care who makes it, though, lol. The worst part for me is the planning. It’s so hard figuring out venues, djs, etc when you can’t be there to look at them or talk to them. 🙁 

Post # 11
Member
2849 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Fiance and I live in North Carolina. Our friends and a few of his family members live here, but the majority of our guests do not. His extended family all live in Michigan, and my family is scattered all over. I have no idea who plans on making the trip down here. I want a small wedding, but I don’t want to have empty tables and chairs.

Post # 12
Member
11356 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2009

My wedding technically was a Destination Wedding for almost everyone, inlcuding Darling Husband and me. Our venue was about an hour and a half from where I and most of my friends lived, three hours from Darling Husband and his friends, about four hours from our closest family members, and many states and hours away from some of our siblings and cousins, etc. However, we ended up having almost 150 people (of the more than 200 we ended up inviting when all was said and done) come to share our special day with us, so, I think you’ll find that those who really want to be there and who do not have some type of insurmountable conflict (work schedule or financial limitations) will do their best to be there.

Post # 13
Member
707 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Our wedding is going to be in OH (where our families live) and Fiance and I live in WA. We have relatives in other states (MI, TX, FL, CA) and our friends in WA, but (I know this sounds horrible) I think I’ll be ok with some of the people not being able to make it. As much as I’d love to see everyone and have them share our day with us, it’ll keep our guest list down!

Post # 14
Member
6124 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

I was planning a destination wedding, but in the states.  I did not invite any extended relatives becuase I am sure they would not come, plus I did not want to budget for their plate as if you were having 100% attendance.

 

Will his immediately family come at least?  That’s all I’d care about.

Post # 15
Member
964 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I feel your pain. FH and I live in TX. Most of his family is here in TX. Wedding is in OH where most of my family lives (an hour away). Friends in NJ/PA. Other family all over. Guessing how many people are going to come is most stressful. My budget hinges on who says YES. I refuse to start biting my nails but this is ridiculous. I wish I could not care, but I’d be lying to myself

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