Post # 1
* I would not have a baby myself. I respect people who do but this is not what I want.
I am getting divorced at 40 and really want a baby. Really awful. Trying to determine do I freeze my eggs. Funny thing is that I dont know anyone who has frozen and used them. Are you over 40 and froze your eggs then used them after?
and just for fun and hope. Did you get pregnant 40 or after naturally?
Love and light to all!
Post # 2
I can’t comment on feeezing eggs but can comment on conceiving naturally after 40. Lady at work had a baby naturally at 42, another lady was 42 too. Then Darling Husband cousin was 42 and she is now 43 & thinks she can still have another one!!
Post # 3
I have a few friends who froze their eggs between the ages of 35-40. I know for sure that 2 of them ended up conceiving naturally at around the age of 40 and didn’t use the frozen eggs and one is still TBD as they haven’t TTC yet (but she is nearing 50, so I’m not sure if they will be viable after 15 years).
If you want to try your best to insure that you can try to have a biological child, then it would be recommended that you freeze your eggs asap (probably after the divorce because you don’t want your stbxh to have claim to them). Eggs don’t freeze as well as embryos, so you will want to make sure that you retrieve 8-10 and make sure you are freezing the most viable and highly graded eggs.
Post # 4
missviolet92 : Thank you for sharing and God bless her!!
Post # 5
sharpshooter : thank you for sharing, Sharpie! Love it. I need to get the courage to try with the needles and hormones but people do it everyday and I also need to try.
Post # 6
Just food for thought….
I went through a divorce when I was 32 and considered freezing my eggs and while I was still young, I knew that I was going to start feeling the pressure of needing to meet someone, get engaged, married, etc. I felt so much pressure in my marriage to get to that point and it all fell apart anyways, that I decided to chance it and not spend the $10,000+ on freezing my eggs.
In the end, what I realized about myself is that it wasn’t a baby that I wanted, it was a family. I ended up meeting an older man who had two children of his own. We talked early on about the fact that he didn’t want anymore children and I did some thinking and realized that maybe I just wasn’t meant to have kids of my own. I yearned for them throughout my entire previous relationship/marriage/divorce and I think I lost sight of so many things just trying to get to that point that I forgot to live in the present. And maybe it’s not the way I thought it would happen, but in the end, we are engaged and his kids have accepted me into their family so I will be a (step) mom and eventually a (step) grandma.
I think one of the biggest problems is that we have a vision of what our life should be and we sometimes are pushing so hard to get to that vision, that we pass up so many other opportunities.
Post # 7
If you don’t want to have a baby alone and you’re over 40 I would say freeze ASAP. You don’t know when your new forever partner will come into your life. It could happen tomorrow, never, or 10 years from now.
Only you know the answer to this but if you’ve REALLY given it a lot of thought and know for sure that you would not want a child if you didn’t have a partner, freeze your eggs now. If you think that there is any chance at all you could decide that having a biological child is something you would want if Mr. Right hasn’t shown up some years from now, I would say freeze some embryos. They have a better chance of survival than eggs.
I thought for the longest time I did not want children unless I had a partner. But as I got older I changed my mind. I could live the rest of my life without a partner but I would be pretty devistated if I didn’t get to see my child before I left here.
Post # 8
I didn’t freeze my eggs but I got pregnant naturally at 39 and 41. If you want a baby, could you do do it sperm and IUI?
Post # 9
I had my last baby at 40 naturally. It took a few months longer than the prior two, but I never even temped or anything else other than a general idea of when I was ovulating.
Post # 10
I would definitely freeze my eggs at 40y.o but would go on a regimen of 600mg coenzymeQ10 daily for 3 months prior to get the eggs into their best possible health. Fertility clinics typically use egg donors if you’re going for IVF past the are of 42.
Post # 11
Everyone’s fertility is going to be different. Just because someone got pregnant naturally at 43 doesn’t mean you will have the same experience. If having your own biological children with a partner is important to you, you absolutely should start talking to a fertility clinic about your options ASAP. From my understanding, the entire process, between waiting for an appointment, medication, and retrieval, can take months, so the earlier you get some concrete info, the better.
Post # 12
My aunt had both her children over 40 and conceived naturally. First one at age 41 then the next at age 44. Mind you, I don’t think freezing eggs was as common then as it is now and I don’t think it would have been an option for her financially either.
Post # 13
If you want a baby I would look into a fertility clinic now, partner or no partner.
The cost to freeze eggs and then do IVF would be very costly and time consuming as well, with no guarantee.
Personally I just can’t imagine having a baby at 45+ but I know people do it.
Post # 14
One of my best friends didn’t start trying for a baby till 39. She and her husband opted for natural conception first. She had a string of miscarriage. I remember I would get an ecstatic message from her telling me she was pregnant and weeks later she would call me in tears saying it is gone.
A year later they started seeing a reproduction specialist. Then the husband had a change of heart (he was ambivalent about having a baby to start with) and resisted any treatments or doctor’s visits. After many fights and discussion, I think she is at the point of giving up now. She is 43yr. She told me she was secretly thinking about freezing her egg “just in case.”
Only you know the answer to this question. Keep in mind situations change, people change, and your body changes and having options is not a bad thing.
Post # 15
botanistbee : Made me so happy I am tearing up. Thank you so much. Gives me hope.