(Closed) overestimated ring accident

posted 9 years ago in Emotional
  • poll: Is it wrong for me to be a little disappointed?

    no, I would be too

    yes, you sound selfish

    yes and no, it's unfortunate that he said 1 to 2 (i would think the same) but you should be happy

  • Post # 17
    Member
    716 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    I don’t think it’s wrong to be disappointed, but if you have something specific in mind then now is the time to let him know. It’s possible that when he began looking he realized that he could get a much better quality 1 carat for the same price as a lesser quality 1.5 or 2. I think a lot of people on here agree that a smaller diamond with great quality is so much better than a larger diamond of lesser quality.

    Post # 18
    Member
    510 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: February 1993

    I also voted for yes, you’re selfish.

    Post # 19
    Member
    85 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: May 2014

    You should be happy he wants to marry you and stop being so preoccupied with the size of the diamond, it’s no reflection on his feelings for you.

    Post # 20
    Member
    2969 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: February 2012

    I think a 1 ct. diamond is very substantial (IMO). Because 1 ct. was in your range I really think you need to let this go for now. You haven’t seen the ring yet, you don’t know how you feel about the setting or the way it will look on your finger.

    I know that it can be disappointing when 1 ct. was the lowest end of the range and that’s what he got, but you need to stop focusing on the fact that it was the lowest end and think about the fact that it’s a 1 ct. diamond! If your range had been .50 to 1 ct. and he picked a 1 ct. thereby picking the highest end of your range would your feeling on the 1 ct. be different?

    I feel like because he said between 1 – 2 ct. your hopes were up that it’d be somewhere in the middle or on the higher end of the range. I agree that if he was getting you a 1 ct. these jokes about it shouldn’t have been made, I think that’s not right. But at the end of the day you are getting a 1 ct. ring and the man of your dreams. Really you need to just focus on that. 

    Post # 21
    Member
    444 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    1 carat is an amazing sized ring! You should be happy!! The size shouldn’t matter, because it’s a show of his love!

    Post # 22
    Member
    2567 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2011

    The way you “fix” this is to first apologize graciously, because what you said could very well have been hurtful, and that’s no way to start your engagement. Then try and figure out why exactly you feel you need a specific carat weight to be happy with your ring.  If it’s what I consider a “real” reason (and I’m having a hard time coming up with something in that category…) then talk with your fiance.  If it’s more for superficial reasons like wanting a “price tag” associated with his love, or being able to show off, or having a “better” ring than someone else, you might want to reexamine your priorities.  It just sounds pretty materialistic to be disappointed with a 1ct ring.

    Post # 23
    Member
    409 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    Ya, selfish. I wouldn’t normally say that but you specifically asked for it…

    It was in the range, it’s will still be a nice size ring and in the long run, it will in no way impact your life & marriage. Honestly, I just don’t get it when girls are more excited about the ring than about the fact that they are engaged. I know this was a “RING” post but still, getting engaged is about so much more. I know that OP may still be happy about other areas of the engagement but this seems to be the one thing that gets most of the focus. I just don’t get it & I feel sorry for the men…holy pressure batman!

    And btw, I’m not bitter b/c I have a small ring, lol Wink.that seems to be the consensus whenever someone questions the crazy focus on ring-size…mine is the perfect size… for me!

    Post # 24
    Member
    409 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    @fishbone:  I should have just agreed with this…perfect!

    Post # 25
    Member
    161 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    I wish my e-ring was 1c. Honestly, yes it sounds selfish. It shouldn’t be about the size of the ring, it’s the idea that he is commining his life to you. I would have been happy if dear Fiance gave me a cracker jack ring when he proposed. 

    Post # 26
    Member
    11 posts
    Newbee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    Remember that you’re marrying the guy, not the ring!

    Post # 27
    Member
    515 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: July 2012

    Sounds selfish to me too. I don’t understand why women are so preoccupied with the size of a diamond. It’s a rock. Size dictates nothing.  The fact that someone took the time to pick one out because he wants to spend the rest of his life with you should be all that matters.

     My ring is I think 0.6 ct (not even sure because I didn’t ask and don’t care) and I think it’s perfect because Fiance took the time to pick it out for me.

    Post # 28
    Member
    543 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: December 2012

    Others have said it, but it should not be about the size, or even that there is a ring in the first place. Are you looking forward to being his wife? Would you still say yes even if he presented you with a plastic gumball machine ring? If the answer is yes (which it seems it would be), then don’t get hung up on it. If it’s no, then you shouldn’t say yes even with a 10 ct ring.

    Tell him you were joking and that you’d be happy with anything he gives you. And stop joking about rings! 😉

    Post # 29
    Member
    1741 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2010

    I voted selfish.

    Sheesh!

    Post # 30
    Member
    1752 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    Its really upsetting the way that the diamond/jewelry industry has trumped up SO much emphasis on size over quality of diamonds. 

    I bet you the cost of the ring, you wouldn’t be able to tell the difference between a 1ct and a 1.2 ct if you looked at them away from each other in a setting you liked.

    I’m not going to call you selfish or give you a lecture about being grateful for what you have, because this happens more often than anyone probably wants to admit –

    but I will say, you (and your boyfriend) and a WHOOOOOOOOOLE lot of other girls out there are victims of a very successful marketing scheme, and thats unfortunate.

    Post # 31
    Member
    228 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: February 2014

    Tell him you’re sorry, and that the ring is perfect! 1 ct is very nice, and it was nice of him to get you a 1 carat… even if he got you .5, it’s because he loves you. 

    The topic ‘overestimated ring accident’ is closed to new replies.

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