Overly affectionate bf (need advice)

posted 6 months ago in Relationships
Post # 16
Member
107 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2015 - City, State

Some bees are misinterpreting what I meant when I mentioned sexual assault, so I just wanted to clarify.  I did not say that what happened in the scenario here is sexual assault.  I said “Touching someone sexually without their consent can constitute sexual assault depending on the circumstances.”  I guess I’m worried there’s more to it than just the holding of the face.  I sincerely hope not!  I just want the OP to be safe.  

Post # 17
Member
416 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2019 - City, State

heytheree :  I Agree with furturemrs2020’s view point the most, I don’t think it’s assault or anything like that from what you tell us I reaaalllly think it’s a stretch to call it that. I also find that you tolerate things differently when you feel differently about someone, so I agree 100% that you probably aren’t fully in love with him. My now Fiance’ can kiss me all day and I’d NEVER get tired of him however, with guys in my past if they asked for two hugs in one day it was annoying to me which I later discovered was because I just wasn’t that into them.

Post # 18
Member
545 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2018

I think any unwanted physical touch is a hard no that should be respected. He shouldn’t force you to kiss him.

Frankly, I’d just dump him. He sounds too needy.

Post # 19
Member
843 posts
Busy bee

It sounds like his love language is physical touch, which isn’t at all in tune with how you like to be shown affection. There’s nothing wrong with him expressing himself through physical touch if he had a partner who enjoyed it. You, however, don’t seem to want to be “lovingly manhandled”, so this is honestly just a base incompatibility. Neither of you would likely feel secure or comfortable in this relationship, and it’s only been 7 months. Best just to move on. 

Post # 20
Member
81 posts
Worker bee

I’m with a previous bee who said that your aversion to such physical overload is maybe a symptom of a bigger problem – that you maybe just don’t like him.  I had a similar experience with an ex I dated for say, two months, who was VERY intense.  By the time we split I couldn’t stand the way he turned the AC knobs in my car.  Seriously.  Not only was I tired of being smothered by him emotionally/physically, I just needed him to get away from me completely, LOL. #unsubscribe

Post # 21
Member
164 posts
Blushing bee

heytheree :  I agree with futuremrs2020 : . Ive had a bf that was like that and I believe its because i didnt give him as much attention as he wanted me to. Thats because I realized I just wasnt that into him. Moving on to my current bf. OOOOh my goodness, I want to hug him all the damn time!

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