(Closed) Overwhelmed and emotional – Anyone else?

posted 5 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
11356 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2009

You are about to experience the most significant change you’ve ever had in your life. It’s totally normal for you to be feeling this way.

I, too, was very independent. I didn’t marry until I was 47 years old and had lived alone, by choice, for more than 20 years before I married my Darling Husband.  And I had to make an overwhelming number of changes in my life to marry him (relocated from a major city to a small town in a very rural area of another state, left behind 25 years’ worth of friendships, had to leave my church and denomination, had to resign my fabulous career, became a pastor’s wife, became a stepmother to multiple children, etc.) There were moments when I definitely was overwhelmed and more than a little apprehensive about making such dramatic changes in my life, especially since I already LOVED the life I had.

About a year after my wedding, I saw my former pastor, and I was telling him how incredibly difficult all of the changes had been for me, and he told me that he and another pastor often joke that they’re performing a “funeral” when they’re actually performing a wedding, because marriage really involves the death of two single people. It’s true.

However, it’s wonderful that you and your FH have found each other later in life just as my Darling Husband and I did.  Giving up your independence as a single woman for the interdependence that is marriage will not be easy; however, there certainly are many benefits of and blessings from doing so. 🙂

Post # 4
Member
484 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

@ALAin2014:  I cry whenever I listen to our song.  I cry whenever I imagine walking in during the ceremony.  I cry whenever I imagine any of the special important moments of the wedding or reception.  I’m sure I’ll be crying on the day.  So, I don’t think it’s that unusual lol.

Post # 5
Member
2961 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

I know exactly what you are talking about. I definitely was apprehensive about my FH moving in with me and I would be lying if I said it wasn’t a huge change. I was so used to doing everything myself and in my own way. Even now I think I am less “couple-oriented” then most bride-to-beesTongue Out. I consider the fact that FH and I have very different work schedules to be a definite plus – I relish “me” time. We have a joint savings account but I immediately said no to a joint checking account. I am slowly getting used to “consulting” with FH because he pointed out that I tend to make most decisions quickly, and on my own. But I am a peculiar person – I don’t watch TV, like non-human animals more than human ones (with some exceptions of course!),an activist for several causes, etc. FH has adjusted to the change in living status far better than I.

Post # 7
Member
21 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: November 2013

@ALAin2014:  I completely understand the guest list part, i also have a small family like yours. I also don’t have a great deal of friends (I prefer to keep just a few close ones) where as Fiance has so many friends its crazy. So we wrote our guest list out and I cried as well. Then I started thinking of other people I could invite to bump my side bigger. At the end of the day I realised I was just being emotional and the only people that would notice was myself. Oh and I cry when I hear our song I also cry at pretty much anything emotional, happy or sad. I’m worried I will pull ugly cry faces in all my photos!

Post # 8
Member
738 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@ALAin2014:  every time I listen to the song I will walk down the isle to I get all choked up and have full on bawled my eyes out quite a few time – you are not alone!! I understand completely what you mean about freaking out when it ‘hit’ you too. I’ll be 30 when we are married this summer, and I’ve been through ALOT in my life. It’s scary to think that once I’m married my old life will be gone forever. Don’t get me wrong, I know it’s a good thing, but change is frightening for all of us. It doesn’t matter if its a change for the better, it’s still all brand new and unknown and different. I have felt similar to this at different points in my life, before other big changes (none quite this big), so I know it’s completely normal!!

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