(Closed) Overwhelmed with planning

posted 7 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
3314 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

It’s tough.  I went through this and I think most every bride does at some point.  I had a much shorter planning period then you (Only 6 months really), but I had days like that too.

Just remember that your wedding day is just ONE day and while it’s a great time to party/enjoy time with family and friends and it definitely is the start of a new page in your life, it really is only ONE day.  It’s the days and years that follow it that are the most important.  So take a deep breath, and try to take a break from the planning for a bit.  ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 4
Member
861 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I can really relate to your struggles. Wedding planning IS very overwhelming.  Most of us have never done anything like this before. It can be really exciting but it can also create a lot of stress. I think we put so much pressure on ourselves and that we can easily lose our true focus by being wrapped up in the details.

Hopefully you have gotten more accomplished than you think you have.  Have you tried any of those list thingy’s that break down the steps into month by month sections?  Maybe that could help.  Also, perhaps you could reach out to friends or family  or your wonderful Fiance for some added support?

I truly hope you’ll find a way to be able to enjoy the process because it really can be fun too!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Post # 5
Member
690 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

Stop looking at the websites for a while and start focusing on your to-do list. If you don’t look at all of the perfectly staged pictures on all of the wedding sites, you will start to feel better.

Post # 6
Member
1315 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

I find I’m doing a lot of this right now too. Until a week ago I was torturing myself, as our venue meant a lot of the things I was looking at were totally unsuitable. Now we’ve a new venue, and I’m going to make miles of bunting, my friend is doing a dessert buffet, and I found the perfect bunting invitation template for free.

I took a while to get to the point, I know, but here it is: have you booked elements of your wedding that you’re unsure of? I was, and once I sorted out the venue issue it all fell into place. I’m still wasting time looking at the blogs, but I’ve a better eye now for what can work for me. I say go through your choices, see if you are hand on heart happy with what you’re getting for your money, then work on maybe revising your to-do list. For all my dithering, I do have most of the big stuff sorted – go me, a whole 12 weeks out haha!

Best of luck, chick.

Post # 7
Member
91 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

It’s as if I wrote this, myself!!!! I second guess EVERY single wedding decision I make. I have realized once a decision is made, there is no going back. I must check it off my list and move on, otherwise I will never get anything accomplished. (and there’s sooooo much to do) My biggest fear is that I will wake up with a tacky looking wedding….since I’m so super indecisive I stick with “safe” options. Like I’m afraid of color so I choose black bridesmaids dresses. I drive my maid of honor nuts! When I simply can’t decide I email options to my Maid/Matron of Honor or my BMs. (which ever in my option I feel has more experience to give the best response) I usually feel better and more sure then.

And always remember to BREATHE!!!

Post # 8
Member
1243 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

I wrote this post about 2 months before my wedding.  ๐Ÿ™‚  I know how you feel.  I was a huge ball of nerves and crazy.  NOT a good time.

I’ll give you the same advice that some very wise ‘Bees gave me at the time: take a break.  Decide to not look at any wedding websites (even weddingbee, if that adds to your anxiety), blogs or vendors.  Try not to talk about it and reconnect with your FH through date nights and fun times.  Seriously.  I know that this sounds hard and, at first, it will seem like you’re slacking off, but it is so worth it.  You will come back to the planning recharged, with more perspective.

Also, give yourself permission to not like every single aspect of planning (or any of it!).  It’s not all invitations and dress purchases and fun times.  Some of it can suck.  It’s okay.  Really.

I was never able to find this book (it was sold out in all of my local Indigo/Chapters store, so obviously the topic is popular), but the website helped me- Search for”The Conscious Bride”.  I felt a lot better when I realised that while society says that this is supposed to be wonderful time, full of rainbows and starshine, it can sometimes (or often) be a scary, overwhelming, and anxious time.  

Realise that you can always come here (at the risk of sounding sappy) and vent about stuff.  That’s what this place is for.  ๐Ÿ™‚  

Feel better.

Post # 10
Member
861 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

@ArwenBride: Really great advise-especially the suggestion to just take a break from it all for a bit.  Thanks.

Post # 11
Member
3 posts
Wannabee
  • Wedding: August 2010

 

All Ladies here, I got married in August and my wedding planner was the BEST BEST BEST. She was not expensive at all and she allowed my husband and I time to be together.

I did not do any stressing or crying, she made my wedding enjoyable for everyone. I did only what I WANTED to.

let me know if u want her info, advise get a WEDDING PLANNER

Post # 12
Member
138 posts
Blushing bee

 

Hey Bees! Yes planning can be very stressful. Each category items that you look at, you should be able to narrow done to your top three. Never exceed your top three, so if you come across another centerpiece idea that you like…give up one of the current three.

Set a planning timeline that is realistic for you; focus on completing one area per every two weeks.

I am a planner and for my brides that contract me for Month of Coordination early I customize a personal planning calendar for them and follow up with them throughout and as we get closer. If you plan early and can hire a planner do so, honestly it is best to meet with 1-3 planners for a free consultation and you will determine if you would like to invest in a planner. You can save time/stress/ money and peace of mind as you weight the cost and investment. However before you hire a planner, keep in mind this person will function as your BFF for the next few months.

Happy Planning, we wish you the best!

 

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