(Closed) Overwhelming urge to TTC… but we cant right now.

posted 5 years ago in TTC
Post # 3
2497 posts
Buzzing bee

@LadyMoriarty:  Don’t cry! You’re actually lucky that it’s all in your hands. The harder you work, the closer you get! The weight loss thing is something you can literally start tomorrow. You’re unemployed and you’re not in school, so now is the best time to try to meet your weight loss goal.

As for school, can you see how the first year and a half goes? If you are really sticking to your studies, it might be possible for you and your Fiance to give it a one time per year try around October or November of your second and third years so it arrives in the summer. If you have a baby during school, it can actually be better for your career so you don’t have to take maternity leave during work. Several women in my grad program did this, and they were some of the brightest women I knew.


Post # 4
231 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

Oh Hun I’m sorry you feel this way πŸ™ this is not your fault…ok so you made some bad decisions in your past who hasn’t? You need to focus on the here and now! I know the overwhelming desire for a child is very potent and powerful and there’s not much to ado about it except work as hard as you can to focus on bettering yourself so when the time comes your in the best possible place to have a child πŸ™‚ 

Post # 7
1105 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

Regardless of what you did or didn’t do in your past, when your body and brain decide they want a baby, that’s it…. we can’t help these things πŸ™


I also long for a baby but FH is not ready and doesn’t want us to try for another 2 years. It’s pure torture. 

Post # 8
470 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

@LadyMoriarty:  focus on the positives you are planning on studying, which is a lt more than other do! You also recognise past makes, again, so much more than others do. Mostly you have a finance who clealy loves you and understands, or at least tries to. 

Post # 9
501 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2011

i dunno, my opinion about these kinds of things tends to be different than the mainstream.


if you were 22 then yeah.


but you are 28. . .not ‘old’ by any means but not super young either. . .if you’re talking about a 4 year degree before ttc, well I wouldn’t want to wait that long either!


why can’t you ttc and be a stay at home wife then a stay at home mom, THEN go back to get your degree–does your dh not earn enough for that to be possibe?


i just know sometimes fertility is limited. . .i started ttc when 29 and I am 31 now. looking back, if I was married and had the chance to ttc at 28, 27, 26, etc then I would tell my younger self to just go for it.


you can always work a career, but you can’t always have a baby.


 I KNOW that is like heresy for so many people these days. . .but biology is not as PC/feminist as we often are! πŸ™‚


ps. also, you are going to put on weight with a baby. . .so i almost feel it might be *more* frustrating to lose a bunch of weight, then ruin your figure w pregnancy and have to lose it again. i mean, starting to eat healthy and work out is obviously a good thing for getting pregnant anyway. . .but saying ‘I must lose 40 lbs before ttc’. . .it’s a valid goal, but just wanted to point out that it could end up being frustrating too!

Post # 11
501 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2011

@LadyMoriarty:  oh gotcha.. . .yes January sounds better than 4 years from now! well, i’m sure it’s still an agonizing wait. . .b/c I know when you feel ready, you’re ready NOW! and it’s hard to resist πŸ™‚

best wishes to you with the weight loss goals though. . .20, maybe even 40 lbs sounds hard but doable in a 9 month timespan if your metabolism cooperates! here’s hoping everything goes well and you get the results you are wanting.

also good luck w the college and w keeping anxiety issues under control.

Post # 12
4575 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

@LadyMoriarty:  (((HUGE VIRTUAL BEAR HUGS)))) I would tell you dont cry, but i find that sometimes crying can help you letting all the anger and frustration out.  Just dont cry your heart out.  Before you know it January will be here and you will start your journey, but in the meantime you can start prepping for that journey.  You can start tracking your periods and learn when you O days are within your cycle, you have that time to get that 30 lbs off, as you wanted, and you get to enjoy Fiance and You time!  GL and I hope you feel better soon ;))))

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