Post # 1
I’m white and my FI is Mexican. We live in the US. He is cradle catholic and I converted a few years ago. In his culture they have godparents or padrinos in the wedding mass. I knew nothing of that but want his culture represented So I’m all for it. He wants his uncle and aunt who live in Mexico as the padrinos and I don’t know them. I’m fine with that but apparently he wants me to feel I can go to them for marriage advice but I am not a natural Spanish speaker and I don’t know them other than the one interaction I had with them. They are not helping to sponsor the wedding or pay for anything, my parents are doing it all. I’ll have them as the padrinos for culture/tradition but now he wants them on our invitations. Bottom line is he out of line to ask for the padrinos to be on the wedding invitations and ask me to view them as important?
Post # 3
It’s definitely a Mexican tradition to do that. I’m Mexican my fiancé is white but we will not have any of that at our wedding or invitations. Plus being a padrino usually means they sponsor you in something. They should be paying for something in order for them to be padrinos. Talked to him and tell him you don’t feel comfortable doing that and mention that since your parents are paying for it, there is no need for padrinos. Good luck.
Post # 3
First, both my fi and I are both Mexican and while we are paying for the entire wedding ourselves, my parents would not hear of us not having godparents for the religious portion of the wedding (catholic ceremony). It is a custom and more importantly a requirement by the church in most congregations. It is definitely weird that they aren’t paying for anything… usually if they are the “Padrinos de Velacion” they are conisdered the most important. They are chosen by BOTH and are chosen due to having a long happy marriage and being wise. You pick ’em so in times of need you can go to ’em for advice. This however has become more symbolic since most couples I know don’t do it however my parents do have a couple the were godparents for that does occasionally come to the house for advice… it’s pretty cool. 🙂 Anyway, so when my parents have been Padrions de Velacion they have purchased the two candles (unity candles) and have in certain occacions paid for the church ceremony which can range from $120 to $575 depending on the church and date (Cathedral vs chapel… saturday vs a less common day). Sometimes this cost is split between ’em and the Padrinos de Lazo (another important couple for the both of you that will place a lazo [infinity shaped] on both of you when the priest requests it and will be another source of guidance and advice in your marriage). So anyway the reason they are placed in the invitation is to one honor ’em for their marriage journey and to make ’em stand out amongst the other guest but… to be honest mostly just to thank ’em for paying the church. Most people feel like if they contribuated with money they should be at least mentioned on the invite which makes sense since that’s why the hosting parents are named on it whenever they are paying. SOOOO lol if they aren’t paying for a thing… then I feel they shouldn’t be placed on the invitaion. To compromise they can be asked to dance after the father/daughter dance mother/son dance so they still feel honored in a while. The DJ can call their name so they can stand up to dance with you. This is also common amonst hispanics when the wedding was “godfathered/sponsored” by family and friends as a sign of appreciation. Feel free to msg with any questions. 🙂