(Closed) parent support vs. on your own

posted 9 years ago in Money
Post # 3
3979 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 2012

My Fiance is mostly paying for our wedding. I’m paying for my dress & accessories and his ring. My mom is paying for all our flowers & his mom sent me a cheque for $50 last month to go towards “whatever I wanted” lol cute.  

He can afford it because he’s in his 30’s, he’s had a good job for the last 10 years & he’s never been married or had kids. He didn’t have anything to spend his money on… so now I’ll spend it for him. lol jk

Post # 4
5498 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2010

We are paying for most if it. The BM’s and GM’s are taking care of their own attire. I bought my dress, and Fiance will rent his tux. We are having a potluck rehearsal dinner because FI’s parents are paying for the reception dinner and I don’t want them to have to pay for both.

I am currently always on the look out for little things. Whenever I got to Micheal’s I pick up candles or ribbon that are on-sale instead of buying it all at once. Venue wise it will be at his family property so we save money there, and FI’s dad is making our cake.

The chair and table rentals will be paid with un-used school loans, and we are considering using just our iPod for the recption. My sisters Mother-In-Law is doing our photograpghy as a gift. = )

We’re a pretty frugal family!

Post # 5
5993 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

my mum gave us $15K and his mum gave us a few $K also (cant remember if it was 2 or 5K)… but ive since given back $6K to my mum by buying something she needed (my mum has money so its easier to buy her something than physically give her cash)

we ended up eloping so we spent money on the trip plus some work done on the house and a big party we had a few weeks ago so his mum could introduce me to the families 

in time, as both parents get older, we expect we’ll be providing for some things as repayment to them – eg hubby and i are already talking about a newer/smaller car for his dad as his car is pretty old

Post # 6
369 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

My parents have set a $18,000 budget for us, and I suppose if we go over it we’re on our own.  His parents are paying for the rehearsal dinner.

Post # 7
11325 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2011

I’ll be paying for my own wedding. No big secret to it… budget and DIY! Really try to not use credit cards or loans… you don’t want to be paying off your wedding for years!

Post # 8
2562 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

We got help from our parents when we bought our home. So we are on our own with respect to the wedding.

We are just spending a little at a time, putting aside what we can and prioritizing the money we do spend. Our budget is about $10 000. 

Post # 9
383 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

We paid for about $7,500 of our own wedding (not including the rings or the honeymoon which we also paid for) which was about 30%. My Darling Husband has a really good job as a financial analyst and I, too, have a good job as a marketing analyst. For the past 2 years we have been able to live solely off of his salary and have been able to save all of my money for a downpayment, wedding, emergency fund, etc. We aren’t frugal by any means and really enjoy entertainment and traveling.

We don’t have as much saved, now that our wedding is over, as I would like to have but based on the fact that we are completely free of any debt and have 0 student loans hanging over our head, I think we are in pretty good shape.

If you are paying for any of your own wedding just try to keep it in your means. My Darling Husband is a negotiator by nature, so luckily we were able to have a really great wedding, while still staying within our budget because he could negotiate prices down. I did a lot of DIY as well (including all the centerpieces), they didn’t look DIY but were a lot of work! Just pick your battles 🙂

Post # 10
1023 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

Um…we are doing a lot ourselves. His parents want to pay for the food, which I am grateful for, but I don’t think that it will be too much based on what we want. Since I’m in college and he just got out our budget is small. I think you can get married on any budget and have a wonderful day.

Post # 11
3098 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2009

We’re paying for almost all of it. Granted, we have a budget of $5k, but still. His mom has given some, and my mom has given some, but we’re paying the rest with cash. We just stopped going out to eat, stopped spending unnecessarily, and it all worked out. 

Post # 12
453 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

We are paying for everything ourselves. With this being an encore wedding for both of us-we made a $5K budget and have stuck to well underneath that. Everything, except for my e-ring-wedding bands, rehearsal dinner, honeymoon, flowers, cake, my dress, the ties the guys are wearing (for our 11 am ceremony, they are wearing navy jackets and khaki pants), invitations, thank you notes, postage for invites and thank you notes, attendants gifts, parents gifts, photographer-everything. You can do it. You can still have a beautiful day if you keep in mind that not everything has to be as absolutely perfect as you think it does and if you focus on the “must have” things and decide on others you can compromise on, you will be in good shape.

We did compromise on our honeymoon-instead of flying off to an exotic location, we are driving up to Tennessee and renting a very secluded cabin overlooking Smokey Mountain National Park-maybe not everyone’s dream honeymoon, but with the economy tanking, everyone broke and on a budget-we decided we’d rather do something we can relax and totally enjoy, than do something extravagent and have to pinch pennies and cut corners.


Post # 13
1371 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

My parents are giving us $5000.  His parents as far as we know are not contributing.  They are sort of strange people and reacted badly when money was brought up.  We are paying for the rest, mostly with inheritance money that is supposed to be coming soon!  It’s a tough bag to figure it all out.  Save as much as you can, make a budget and STICK TO IT!  Non-traditional choices have saved us money, such as a BBQ caterer, suit and dress from off-the-rack stores, buying his ring online. . .

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