(Closed) Parents hosting but Return Address to Bride and Groom?

posted 9 years ago in Paper
  • poll: If parents are hosting, but bride wants to track RSVPs, what is the return address on reply cards?
    Return address should be host address : (7 votes)
    18 %
    Return address should be the address of the person tracking the RSVPs and planning the seating chart : (24 votes)
    62 %
    It doesn't matter : (8 votes)
    21 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    2856 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2009

    I voted that it doesn’t matter. My Fiance and I are hosting the wedding but I made the return address to be my parents. I did this because the house we are renting is up for sale so I didn’t want to get caught in between a sale when waiting for the invites to arrive. Although they are going to my parents, my Mom calls me everyday to let me know who responded and what their answer was that way I can update my list.

    Post # 4
    Member
    908 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2009

    I had the same dilema and I decided to list my parents address on the back flap of the invitation envelopes because it was "coming from them" but I put myself on the RSVP envelopes. 

    I didn’t want my Mom to have to deal with them and I’m a bit of a control freak, plus it’s nice to see the messages people write and we were able to send out B-list invites as soon as we got some "no" responses back.

    I don’t think it’s a big faux-paw.

    Post # 5
    Member
    247 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: April 2009

    I voted that it doesn’t matter.  We had informal invitations.  Since the wedding was being paid for by my parents, my husband’s parents and ourselves we gave our address as the RSVP address and the return address.  No one had a problem with me doing it this way.

    Post # 6
    Member
    3332 posts
    Sugar bee

    I think it’s fine if your parents are technically hosting, but RSVPs are sent directly to you and your fiance.  My best friend did this, as she was living out of state and handling the planning herself, even though her parents were paying for the wedding.  I think you can just put your address as the return address on the reply card.  Honestly, I don’t think people will necessarily notice the difference.

    Post # 7
    Member
    952 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2009

    I don’t think it matters in the least.

    Post # 8
    Member
    349 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: September 2009

    My mom, my fiance’s parents and us are sharing the costs of the wedding, and we put the reply address as ours. We’re doing the seating chart and giving final counts to the venue, so it seemed right. And honestly, neither set of parents could be trusted with this 🙂

    I once got an invitation for a wedding where the bride’s family footed the bill, and the reply cards were addressed to the bride’s father. It was very traditional, and kind of took me my surprise. I didn’t think couples really did that anymore!

    Post # 9
    Member
    4480 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: March 2010 - Calamigos Ranch

    Have RSVPs go to you. Your guests won’t really notice, and it’s just much more convenient that way.

    Post # 10
    Member
    51 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: August 2009

    I had them come to me since I was planning everything and my mom (hosting) is in a different state. My guess is few people even look at the return address, or even the address on the RSVP.

    We did get one returned because someone moved and they couldn’t forward it. In that case I was glad it got returned to us, because it was easiest for us to handle it.

    Post # 11
    Member
    2820 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: February 2013

    If you’re planning the wedding, the RSVPs should go to you. Otherwise, you might end up with second-hand information from your mom about who’s coming and who’s bringing a plus one, etc., and she may either forget to mention something, or say that so-and-so’s coming when all they gave was a verbal RSVP…or she might not communicate meal choices…etc.

    Post # 12
    Member
    792 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: August 2009

    My mom is hosting our wedding but we had the RSVPs come to our house. It just makes things easier since I’m doing much of the planning. Plus, people will write little notes to you on the RSVPs and they make for nice keepsakes.

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