(Closed) Parents not hosting… How to word the invite?

posted 5 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
1502 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

Something like, “Bride’s name and Groom’s name invite you to share in their joy…”

Post # 4
1502 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

Do a search for non-traditional invitation wording.  You’ll find lots!

Post # 5
11270 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2012

@angelalsmith3:  you can change the wording on the template and even leave some of the lines blank if need be.  you can even change the font style and font size with the custom option.

as pp mentioned, there are lots of suggestions online.  vista print even has some.

Post # 7
3170 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

This was my invite except the info is different. It’s how we worded things…

Post # 8
1696 posts
Bumble bee

@angelalsmith3:  First, do not get hooked into the “funding = hosting” misconception. Your financial arrangements are your own: it would be vulgar to publicise them, and vulgar to assume that what you read on a formal invitation is publicising someone else’s financials. “Hosting” means lending a lady’s lending her social reputation to an event that takes place under her auspices, where she is taking responsibility for the safety and comfort and entertainment of all her guests and therefore also has the final say on all related decisions. I accept your assertion that you are hosting — I just didn’t want you to stray into the confusion between money matters and social matters.

Second, traditional etiquette requires that the wording for a formal invitation put the hostess’s name, and her husband’s name if she is married, at the top of the invitation. If the hostess is the bride’s mother who is married to the bride’s father, then yes the bride’s parents’ names would go at the top. Putting the parents’ names at the top when they are NOT the hosts actually violates traditional formal etiquette.

So, assuming that you want to be (mostly) proper and formal, your invitation should read:

requests the honour of your presence


September twenty-eighth
Two Thousand Thirteen
three o’clock

First Baptist Church
1234 Main Street
Smallville, Kentucky

But, with the form you are using, that has too few lines and would leave a big blank before the name of your fiance. Fortunately, there is another even-more-traditional and even-more-proper option, and that is to avoid the discordant second-person “you”, and avoid the need for inner-envelopes, and have a write-in line on the invitation itself where you write the name of the guests. Like this:





Post # 9
2474 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

I think on vistaprint your able to specify the hosting parties? I thought it was that way when you first fill out the template and it says like “brides parents hosting, both parents hosting, and couple hosting”… that should fix the template and it should give you just you and your Fiance…..otherwise Mine had:

Shanbp and Shanbp’s Fiance

request the honour of your presence as they exchange vows on their wedding day…..etc etc… 

Post # 10
720 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

We worded ours, “Together with their families, (Bride) and (Groom) request the honour of your presence….” As PP mentioned, “hosting” isn’t just about finances. Our families have helped us out in a million ways, and we’re doing it as a team. Now, if you guys are doing everything yourselves, entirely, there are probably other ways to word that.

Post # 11
1108 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I’m not sure if this would fit in your template, but we are using this wording which I found online and loved:

Because you have shared in our lives
in your friendship and love


invite you to share in the beginning
of our new life together
as we exchange wedding vows


We are paying and hosting the wedding ourselves, and we didn’t want to put all our parents (6 including stepparents) on the invite so we did that.  I think it sets the tone for a more intimate wedding

Post # 12
2474 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@angelalsmith3:  hey I almost used vistaprint for mine, I just clicked on your link to see if it works and it does, but you can delete those lines totally and move things around….. go there and click the more customized options right above the invite….. when you do it will reload the page with moveable text…if you click on any of the text you can just delete it…or drag it where you want on the page….so if you like the font of something you can drag it where its appropriate or add text boxes too!!  


Post # 14
226 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

@chercee:  +1 We also started with “Together with their parents…” We wanted to involve them in it, but they’re not hosting it, and we’re not having a formal wedding, so traditional wording sounded too stuffy for us. 

Post # 15
2556 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

I think we’re going to do something like “MsAmandaAnn and MrAmandaAnn, along with their families.. blah blah blah…”

This is mainly because I have a stepfather involved and I didn’t want anyone to get caught up in the semantics (even though my stepfather is much closer to me than my father).  Plus, Fiance and I are paying for 90% out of our own pockets.

Post # 16
3306 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

In the place where the parents’ names normally go, we put: “with Joyful Hearts.” It was actually right there in the template dropdown and it worked so I didn’t attempt to tweak it.


With Joyful Hearts 

Overjoyed LaMorena and

Idris Elba

Request the honor of your presence

yadda yadda ya…


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