(Closed) Parents want to view venue with us

posted 5 years ago in Venue
Post # 3
Member
10 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: September 2013

She’s your mom and you are getting married, she probably just wants to feel included…

 

also if your parents are paying/helping pay for your wedding I think its resonable that they want to check the place out with yall..

Post # 4
Hostess
7561 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: January 2013

Are they contributing to the wedding? If they are I can understand them wanting to ask some questions. If they’re not I would just suggest that you go for lunch instead.

Post # 5
Member
750 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2014

I think your mom would be extremely hurt if you told her you didn’t want her there…Like PPs said, she’s your mom and she wants to be included!

Post # 7
Member
7719 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

@Chinchi: No you’re not mean, and I totally understand how it can add stress!

I suggest that, in future, you don’t even tell them you’re looking at a certain venue. You’re an adult, you don’t need to tell her your every movement.

I’m not sure what to suggest this time; either try to be firm with her, or just tolerate her tagging along this once 🙂

Post # 8
Member
5766 posts
Bee Keeper

There’s honestly no stress when viewing a potential venue no matter how many people tag along. Why would there be? Isn’t it better to have more people see and point out potential issues that you might not consider? Setup for a wedding is completely different than many other events that the venue might hold, so I would think that in your excitement, having extra eyes and ears will be helpful.

I know when my daughters looked at some alone, they forgot to ask about many things that they didn’t even think were important. Guests seperated into different rooms, bad weather backup, outdoor tenting….it meant for a lot of extra footwork for them as they had to backtrack to see if everything would work out as they wanted.

If you don’t want them there, it would have been better to not even tell them. Now that you have, I’m guessing some feelings will be hurt.

Post # 9
Member
4495 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

My mom always feels the need to remind me of what to ask, too. Its annoying, but what can you do? I think your parents want to go because they are your parents and they want to be involved in your wedding planning. I don’t really think its that strange for them to want to go with you. I think you’ll probably really hurt their feelings if you say no..

Post # 10
Hostess
7561 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: January 2013

@Chinchi:  In that case I’d probably not include them. They probably just want to visit with you, right? Why not offer to meet up with them after? 

Post # 11
Member
6112 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2013

Eh, I took my mom and step-dad to all the potential venues. Granted, they are footing majority of the bill. However, I just thought it was something nice we could all do together. We went and had a nice lunch afterwards and discussed the pros and cons to each venue. I think it helped to have more than my FI’s and my viewpoints on each place.

But to each their own, and you’re not mean to want to only do this with your Fiance.

Post # 12
Member
757 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

My parents and my Future Mother-In-Law came with us to look at venues, my parents are paying for the majority so that was why theyw ere there but my Future Mother-In-Law just wanted to feel included. It was nice to have lots of different perspectives and lots of people to ask questions, plus we had a nice time. 

Post # 13
Member
8737 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2013

@Chinchi:  i wanted my mom to be at every venue we looked at.  she has insight, ideas, and questions that i didn’t always think to ask.

 

 

Post # 15
Member
125 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

My Fi and I went alone to the venues. It was fun to look around and imagine our wedding together. The venue we chose has been used by other family members so my parents are familiar with it. My mom understood this was a special time and my Fiance was not going to be involved in many other areas of wedding planning so she let us have this day together.

Post # 16
Member
2437 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@brit090807:  +1, my mom came with us when we toured our venue. 🙂

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