(Closed) Past Ex Popping up In My Dreams….(Little Long)

posted 8 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
18641 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

Honestly, I don’t think there is anything to it.  Just because you dream about someone doesn’t mean that you want them.  I think you are just having some nerves about getting married like everyone does and you are thinking what if I had done something differently?  I really would not worry about it, it will go away.

Post # 4
1561 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I totally agree with MissASB. I don’t think there’s anything to it either – you obviously love your Fiance and we all have those feelings of “what if” when it comes to others.

I CONSTANTLY have dreams where my ex’s show up the good ex’s and the bad ones…and more always usually one in particular who – as gorgeous as he was (probably the most good looking of all of them) was the one who hurt me the most – and so, unfortunately, he’s always going to be in my thoughts – and the dreams are even romantic/intimate dreams. but to me – it’s all about security AS WELL AS knowing that my husband loves me more than any of those guys ever did. we are totally meant for one another and it almost irritates me that I DO have those dreams – but of course I have no power over what happens in my dreams…

so honestly just concentrate onw the love you and your Fiance do have for one another. and don’t think too much into it.

Post # 6
4001 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I agree, I wouldn’t read to far into this.  I think its a normal reaction when your wedding is approaching, to wonder what could of been, what would of been.  I wouldn’t really do anything about it, as in, seek out your ex.  If you love and respect your Fiance, that might end up being a huge mistake.  Its also normal to have residual ‘feelings’ for an ex that you shared so much with.  A month or so ago, I posted about my first love emailing me.  I had to decide whether to respond or not.  It made me feel nostalgic, until I remembered the negatives.  It made me feel like I didn’t have enough closure, until I realized that chapter is so completely over.  In the end, I decided not to respond, because I was feeling some kind of way about it and I didn’t want to do anything that would upset my Fiance.  Don’t know if that helps but to sum up- this is normal.

Post # 7
536 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

Inbetween-This happens to me a lot as well!  Sometimes I think its because I never had any real closure on the situation.  I always want to email my ex and check it but I know that is a super bad idea!  As others have said I think its prob normal to wonder what the people in your past are doing now.  I just try not to let it get to me….but ooooh thos butterflies will do it everytime! ๐Ÿ™‚  If you ever need to talk you can message me:)  Good luck sweetie!

Post # 8
972 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

Its normal, i’ve been dreaming of two of my exes!

Post # 9
2090 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

I agree – totally normal, and doesn’t mean anything (or mean you love your FH any less).

I think too, when this happens (dreams about ex), we tend to think/worry about it, which makes it more likely to happen again, because then it’s on your mind. Know what I mean?

I also think its totally normal to wonder “what if” on a chapter in your life, when you are getting ready to completely shut that door forever. Even though you have shut the door on that relationship and moved on – it will be different once you are married, more final.

Don’t worry about what you do in your dreams, you have no control over them. Just worry about what you do in real life, that you do have control over ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 11
331 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

I’ve been dreaming about my ex too! We’ve been broken up six years, and I’m 110% sure that was a good choice, and the dreams usually aren’t good (sometimes bad, sometimes neutral). For me, I think its because after we broke up, he moved to a different city, and I just ended up getting a job and moving to that city. I’m convinced i’m going to run into him at some point, and the whole idea of that is just weird. I think I want to just get it over with so I can stop wondering when I’ll see him.

Anyway, seeing all the posts here makes me realize its not that weird, so hopefully you feel better too!

Post # 12
73 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

It happens to me too.  In the 3-6 months before I got engaged I was dreaming about my ex at least once a month, and it always put in the worst mood.  It made me freak out and wonder if I made a mistake by ending it.  Finally, I reminded myself of every reason we broke up and why I’d rather be with my Fiance than my ex.  And I’ve talked to a lot of friends who said that happened to them when they were engaged too.  So I think it’s totally normal.

Post # 13
3979 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 2012

This JUST happened to me last night!! My ex was in my dreams… only I think we were married. My Fiance popped up & was angry, but I still chose to be with my ex. lol I woke up all, “wth!?”

I definitely think these dreams are normal. Our ex’s were a significant part of our lives & our past!! As long as you aren’t actively seeking out your ex or acting on these “dream feelings” then it’s okay!

Post # 14
351 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

this happens to me all of the time with all of my exes! In fact, i dreamt last night that i was marrying my first love geez!! It’s really annoying and I feel guilty every time it happens. But i’m sure it’s normal – seems like lots of girls are having this happen – so i’m just moving on with my day and not taking it seriously ๐Ÿ™‚

i’m hoping these dreams will stop after i’m married LOL.

Post # 16
338 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

This happens to me constantly.

For me its my first love ….we dated over 10 years ago at this point. We had been off and on for about 3 years…but now its been years since we’ve had any kind of realtionship, romantic or friendship.

Im glad to know that i am not the only person that this happens to.Ive started feelign really guilty ๐Ÿ™

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