- 6 years ago
Dilemma: I have 9 BMs…..My wedding is “mini-destination” meaning it is about a 4.5 hour car ride (for the farthest bm) and about 2-3 hours for ALL of them. I am having my wedding the Sunday of Labor Day Weekend (Sept. 1 :]) for various reasons, and I was hoping to have the girls all come up on Saturday morning. The plan was to go to the spa together, then have a Bridesmaid or Best Man luncheon that my future Mother-In-Law and I are hosting/paying for, then on to the rehearsal dinner. (Maybe lunch first THEN spa…One or the other). That night would be the rehearsal dinner and then I’m paying for all of the bridal party to stay in “suites” within a hotel that night so we can have a big sleepover (kind of). So many of us, we kinda have to split up 3-3-4 in rooms.
Therefore, the BM’s are paying for: Dress + alterations, shoes, gas/driving costs, and a hotel room for the night of the wedding if they choose to stay in town, which most probably will. The dress I found cost them $152 (with tax) for each of them! I plan to keep shoes under $50 for sure.
I for sure want to treat myself to a mini spa day. There is an amazing spa package in Nashville that includes an hour-long massage, mani/pedi, time in the sauna, and a facial OR body polish all for $150!! They also serve you sangria, I think, while you are there. It seemed like a really fun thing to do with the bridal party.
For their gifts, I plan to buy them monogrammed robes, so this would be such a cute place to wear them/take pictures, and pay for their Bridesmaid or Best Man jewelry since I want them to be matching. With NINE BMs, the cost for the robe/jewelry for each of them comes out to be about $50 per person or $450. The hotel will prob cost about $200 per suite, and I have to get 3 of them, so that’s another $600. Therefore, I CANNOT pay for $150 spa costs for each of them.
I plan to pay for my MOH’s as a special thank you, but how do I handle it? Do I invite the rest to “join us” and make it optional so whoever WANTS to come can come and buy their own? Do I give them all a bit of “spa credit,” say enough to cover a mani/pedi and let them buy their own extra services like a massage if they desire it? Or do I take them all to a student-run massage school spa near the Opryland hotel and buy them ALL hour-long massages at $35 each?? Can they even fit all 10 of us in within a reasonable time do you think? Then I could run do my nails with my Maid/Matron of Honor and invite the others along…OR I could just do the Mini Spa day with Maid/Matron of Honor, my mom, Future Mother-In-Law and Future Sister-In-Law…THoughts??? Suggestions?? Advice? This wedding is all turning out to be SUPER expensive, and I’m really starting to worry about costs…
I’ve also heard you are supposed to provide the BM’s breakfast the day of the wedding, which means more costs…It’s an evening wedding, so I guess i’d make it a late morning brunch…What type of food does this typically consist of?
Also, do you think the “sleepover” is even a good idea? I dont want to be exhausted the morning before my wedding from staying up late talking, but I dont want to be alone either..Most of my bridal party have SO’s coming up they could/might would rather stay with…Do I just leave them to pay for their own accomodations/put some toward everyone’s room or what (*if I DONT do the sleepover)?? That would technically mean TWO nights in a hotel for everyone…
I wanted to kind of “make a weekend” of it, which is why the wedding is on Sunday, but my venue technically wont even let us have the actual rehearsal until the day of the wedding, so the whole Saturday thing is “extra” in and of itself I guess..But I DO want them to be in town the day before and not be coming in the day of the wedding, because that would stress me out, knowing some of them tend to be late, etc…