(Closed) Paying for a wedding.

posted 6 years ago in Money
  • poll: How did you/will you pay for your wedding?
    Mostly Parents : (90 votes)
    28 %
    My FI and I : (202 votes)
    64 %
    Other : (24 votes)
    8 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    3265 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: February 2014

    We’re paying for the entire thing ourselves. It’ll be a lot of DIY, off season wedding (probably in January, nothing’s been secured), and I’m sorry to say I’m cutting out my cousins. I have 17 first cousins, all but 2 are married/in serious relationships, and I’m also saying no kids. We’re going to be using fake flowers for the bouquets and boutineers – no flower centerpieces. We’ll also probably have an early Sunday wedding, which also cuts a bit of cost.

    My friend is getting married next October and is buying her flowers from the grocery store. Sounds strange, but they have some seriously beautiful flowers. She did a mock up one already and it turned out beautifully.

    Post # 5
    Member
    2711 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    It was a combination. My parents paid for some, my H and I paid for some, and his parents paid for some.  Best ways we found to save money:

    DIY as much as we could – programs, escort cards, centerpieces, etc.

    Had non-floral centerpieces – we did have some floral centerpieces, but most were not

    Postcard Save-The-Date Cards (saved on postage)

    Used Vistaprint for the invites, thank yous, and Save-The-Date Cards – found groupon deals

    Kept the invites simple (no big bows, no inner envelopes, no extra large invites) – saved on having to buy extra postage

    Negoiated with vendors – we negotiated with our venue/caterer and manged to get a few discounts such as a late night snack.  I also got $250 off my wedding dress by letting the sales woman know I was seriously considering another, cheaper dress.

    Ordered in bulk – we needed 130 candle holders from Michaels and instead of buying 130 individual holders, my mom got the manager to order them all in bulk and thus at a discounted price.

    Serve beer and wine only – ok, we didn’t do this, but I know lots of people that have

    Skipped things like chair covers, up lighting, videographer, chiavari chairs

    Had a buffett meal

    Have a smaller cake that is just for display and for cutting then serve guests sheet cake

    Don’t be afraid to return things.  I bought a lot of stuff for Michaels when trying to figure out my centerpieces and was able to return most of the unused stuff.

    Find and use coupons

     

    Good luck!

     

    Post # 6
    Member
    3 posts
    Wannabee

    @Kelshock:  There are so many ways to cut costs, I used groupons for Vistaprint and spent $35 for 90 invitations plus thank you cards. No rsvp cards or postage-online rsvp at the website. DIY centerpieces and bouts, real flowers only for the bouquets.  You just have to decide what is really important to you and what really matters in the long run—

    Post # 8
    Member
    6256 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: March 2014

    Have it in a smaller town. My venue would have cost 3-4x as much in a larger city.

    Lower your formality level. Plated dinners are $$$. If you’d be cool going outdoor homespun/rustic/funky, you could have potluck, cake and punch with cotton candy and popcorn in the afternoon, or have a really great taco truck cater.

    Have the wedding in a community center or park

    DEFINITELY have the wedding in a place where they will let you bring in your own food and alcohol. My dress was free, but this was still the single cost-saver in my wedding.

    DIY the flowers, whether that be bulk florals or something like paper bouquets. I’ve seen this look really great and it can literally save thousands.

     

    Some things that others say will save you a great deal of money but didn’t at all for me:

    -Marrying in an off-peak month: I’m marrying in March and though it’s in the bottom 3, I’ve yet to be able to negotiate a discount based on this

    -Marrying on Friday night–thought about this, but it was less like a discount and more like they were charging the same amount of $ per hour, but were just requiring/allowing you to purchase fewer hours.

    -Getting a less expensive photographer–I ended up just tacking on a ton of extras, such as a day after session, two shooters, etc. I don’t mind, because the photog is awesome, but financiallly it has been pretty much a wash.

    Post # 9
    Member
    9539 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: September 2013

    Right now it’s about 50/50 between my parents and us (me and FI).  However, he still hasn’t asked his parents if they would like the option of helping out with any of the wedding.  If they decide to it will lessen what we have to pay.

    Do you know what your budget is or around what it will be?

    Post # 10
    Member
    3771 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: August 2013 - Brookfield Zoo

    Everyone’s given great suggestions so far, so my only bit is that when you diy, make sure you keep track of what the budget will really add up to and do your research!  I have been doing diy centerpieces, invitations, etc., and it is probably saving me half the amount it would cost if I hadn’t, but at the same time, had I researched other printing options or smaller card sizes, and been a little more strict about sticking to limits (for instance, I had a $20 limit on a specific part of the centerpieces, but I could have knocked that down and just searched harder), I could’ve saved even more!

    Post # 12
    Member
    9631 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: April 2019

    It will be mostly our parents. 

    Post # 13
    Member
    9539 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: September 2013

    @Kelshock:  Yes, it can be done, but it will definitely take some work!  Some of this others have already touched on.

    In my experience the biggest expenses will be the reception (venue, food, alcohol if you are having any)…so if it were me I would look to find a place that was very cheap to rent and that let me bring in my own alcohol.  Caterer shouldn’t be too difficult, a lot of places like grocery stores can do some catering for pretty cheap (thinking $10 pp)

    I would start with you and your Fiance writing down a list of what is the most important to you.  Focus more of your money on these things. 

    You might have to get creative if you are wanting some other traditional elements (photography comes to mind because it tends to be expensive)

    You could do your own flowers cheaply especially if you just stick with ONE flower.  Then you can order some of those in bulk and get away with just having bridal party flowers for $200 or less (depending on how many people you have)

    Like others said…do non floral centerpieces (think candles), or if you can bake then make your own cupcakes and just have a small top tier of a wedding cake.

    Music could be tricky depending on where you have your reception.  I’ve seen some places with sound systems you can just plug your iPod into..others you might need speakers.

    I would create your own invites and use a VistaPrint groupon to do them.

    For a dress, there are a lot of inexpensive options and there are a lot of sites where people are selling their used-once dresses.  That or buy a sample!

    Other ways to save money: Do it on a Sunday or a Friday (some vendors had discounts….others didn’t). Off-season…January would be a great month!

    Post # 14
    Member
    1830 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: November 2014

    I am going to DIY as much as I can. Having a long engagement is allowing me to pick up on a lot of deals, as well as just have more time to save. We are paying for the wedding entirely ourselves. Also,

    1. Only invite people you truly want to be there. Just because they’re “family” doesn’t mean you must invite them, especially if you never see/talk to them or have only met them a few times!

    2. We are having a November wedding on a Sunday. From putting out feelers, I have found that the perks of this are no minimums for food/beverage for an off-season wedding, some places offering 40-60% off room rentals for Sunday wedding, photographers offering discounts for both off-season and Sunday wedding, etc.

    3. We are going to do our flowers ourselves through a DIY company called the Flowerman that will save a lot of money.

    4. I am going to be hunting the clearance racks for my dress/accessories/etc.

    5. One of the venues we are strongly considering allows us to bring in our own alcohol and only pay a bartender fee. Lots of money saved there! If we go with somewhere that requires a bar package, we are also going to do call liquor only to save money.

    Post # 15
    Member
    9539 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: September 2013

    You also might have to cut your guest list…..for instance, I am not sure you can stay under budget if you are trying to feed 300 people dinner.  It probably just won’t work.  If you HAVE to have these people there, then do just cake and drinks.  Otherwise, cut the list.  You don’t have to have every single relative there, especially if you haven’t seen them in 10 years.  If your parents aren’t paying then they really don’t get much say in the way of the guest list.

    Post # 16
    Member
    479 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    I agree w/ other people. Try to do a lot of DYI things.. And cut down your guest list. Maybe only invite the most important and closest friends and family.

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