(Closed) Paying for half of my engagement ring?

posted 5 years ago in Engagement
Post # 16
Member
1238 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2017 - The Lodge at Little Seneca Creek

I’m in a similar situation to you, and I offered to pay for half of my ring. However, my Fiance wanted to pay for it on his own even though he could just barely afford it because he likes traditions like that. I’ll be paying for the majority of the wedding, so it kind of evened out.

Post # 17
Member
918 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2017

Hey, I say if you’re willing and able, get the ring you want and go for it! 

Post # 18
Member
37 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: October 2017

SO and I have been together for 10 years and own a house. We’re not engaged yet but we’ve just bought a ring together. Similar situation with one big difference. We don’t have separate accounts. All our income goes into our revolving credit home loan and we pay our expenses, fixed home loan repayments and luxury items out of it. It means we’re constantly paying off as much of our mortgage as possible (less interest = debt free sooner) but we’ve still got the flexibility of buying things whenever we want to because it’s like one big overdraft. If he’s having to take a loan out with a high interest rate, then I would contribute your ‘savings’. As nice as it is to be able to track your personal contributions in case things go down south one day, the only person winning is the bank at the end of the day. I’ll bet you’re paying the bank much more in loan interest than the bank pays you in ‘savings’ interest.

Oh gosh that sounded like a really serious answer 😅

Post # 19
Member
199 posts
Blushing bee

I was going to pay for half of my ring but we decided that he would buy the ring and I would buy him an engagment bike! He had been wanting a new bike for his commute for years and I thought it would only be fair if he got something nice to celebrate this new phase in our lives too! I did get the better deal because the ring cost more! surprised

Post # 20
Member
122 posts
Blushing bee

My DH purchased my e-ring, but he is very traditional when it comes to that sort of thing. I see nothing wrong with couples splitting the cost of the ring, and don’t think it’s uncommon these days. Getting married means sharing your lives together, and that includes finances. 

Post # 21
Member
60 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: February 2017 - Californos

I didn’t quite pay half, but I contributed a good portion for my engagement ring. My fiancé makes double what I do so he didn’t expect me to make the same contribution as him. We live together and pay for everything together (although our baking is still separate) so it didn’t matter to me. It may not have been traditional but I have no regrets, and it helped move our timeline as a couple along 😄

Post # 22
Member
1422 posts
Bumble bee

We did about 60:40. We’ve lived together for 4+ years and I’ve been on and off with working part time and going to school full time. It worked for us!

Post # 23
Member
1423 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2018

My original ring was paid by my Fiance. The “upgrade” was paid 50/50 and I wanted to actually pay the whole thing but he insisted on paying half. Do what’s best for you guys 🙂 

Post # 24
Member
194 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

My DH put the ring on interest free credit card, not because he didnt have the money, but because for us it made more sense to have the interest free debt as opposed to losing the cash from savings. We also put our wedding rings on there, as well as a new gold chain when mine broke. I ended up making a few of the payments on the card, so who knows who paid for what. It was all paid for, we have separate bank accounts but we’re married so who cares who pays for what, so long as it’s paid for. 

Post # 25
Member
278 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2017

Do whatever works out for you, if my fiancé hadn’t have wanted a ring himself or an engagement gift in return I d have certainly wanted to pay for half of mine. I didn’t think it was equal if a man spends quite a bit of money on a ring and they got no gift in return. 

Post # 26
Member
43 posts
Newbee

I paid for half of my ring. He had told me what his budget was and I was happy to chip in if I found myself preferring a more expensive ring, which turned out exactly half and half.

We live together in a house he owns and pays the mortgage, house bills and his personal bills and I pay for groceries, my personal bills and contribute to house bills. 

Post # 27
Member
148 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

Definitely don’t have him take out a loan if you have the money in savings! I like the idea of a man buying the ring though. Is his budget enough for a ring you would like and wear every day? Also, I am planing on buying him a nice gift in return for our engagement – like a nice watch with engraving or something for his bike. Maybe your SO has something as well he would love to have and would use his money on if it weren’t for the engagement ring.

Post # 29
Member
11 posts
Newbee

I didn’t pay towards my engagement ring however I don’t see a problem with it. My OH saved up for the last couple of years to buy it and I would have loved to have been able to contribute towards it but I just didn’t have the money. I haven’t been proposed to yet so I’m not sure what the ring looks like, but my OH has no restraint when it comes to buying things so I am doubtful he stuck to his original budget. I have reiterated over and over again that I would have been happy with an inexpensive ring from one of those pawn style shops (we live in the UK) as I don’t like the thought of him spending money on a ring. In the end, it is what works best for the individual couple so if you are both ready and both comfortable going 50/50 then go for it! smile

Post # 30
Member
230 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: February 2022

Hmm I like the idea that it’s a gift from him. I like the other suggestions of rejigging payment for house/bills. 

Easy for me as my Fiance is the rich one and Im the poor one But I would absolutely have refused to have paid for half my ring. I refused to buy a house pre-engagement too, though we can’t afford this yet anyway. 

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