Post # 1
- Wedding: April 2014 - Italian Villa
I’m not engaged yet, but SO and I have talked about the possibility of a destination wedding. and it has made me wonder, do people usually pay for flight, accomodation, or both for their parents and/or wedding party?
For us it would be small-
My sister (MOH)
His sister (BM)
and his 2 best friends (Best man and groomsman)
Which is only 8 people, not including us, which would bring it to 10. Given the financial situations of our friends/sisters, if we want them there we would probably have to pay for them (although our parents might pay for the sisters anyhow). Really these are the only people that we REALLY want to be there.
Did you pay for flight and/or accomodation for your parents and/or bridal party for your DW? If so, did you pay for all or only part of the expenses? I would still expect them to pay for bridesmaids dresses, etc.
Post # 3
we did not pay for anyone but we did make sure those we really wanted to be there could afford to come before we made any set plans
Post # 4
I paid for my BP’s accomodation. I would have paid for my parents accomodation and flights if they needed it.
Post # 5
We paid our parents flights only.
Post # 6
We’ll pay for the accommodation of the bridal party + the dresses and hair – but not for the flights. However, they’ll all live in Sweden and we’ll fly there for the wedding. So their travel costs will only be the in-flights in Sweden, which is pretty much nothing as it’s so cheap to travel in Europe.
As for our parents, mine will just drive 3 hours for the wedding, while my FI’s parents will have to get tickets from Canada. However, they travel to Europe each summer anyway – so it’s not that much of a stretch for them.
Post # 7
We aren’t paying for anyone’s flights or accommodations. It would be impossible for us.
Post # 8
Every destination wedding I’ve been to everyone paid their own way.
Post # 9
I’ve been having this same dilemma. We’re having a Destination Wedding in Bali, and we have guests coming from just about everywhere – Europe (FI is Swiss, I have friends in London, Paris and Belgium), the US and Canada, Asia (China, Hong Kong, Singapore) and finally my family and friends in Australia.
Fiance wants to pay for his mother to fly out, as she doesn’t work and is unlikely to be able to fund her own trip. I’m happy with that, but I’m not sure what we will do about accomodation. We are planning to finance our wedding ourselves, but realistically my parents will want to contribute generously. I just don’t want to get into an awkward situation where my parents end up paying for his parents (or his mum, given his parents are divorced).
In response to the poll, we are broadly planning to rent a villa in Bali that can accomodate most of our closest family and friends – that is, parents, grandmother, his brother, my aunt and cousin. But then it gets a bit complicated, because FI’s parents are split up and his father will likely want to bring the other woman, which will cause huge dramas. I can’t imagine them all under the same roof. I don’t know what to do about the bridal party, because both of my bridesmaids are married (one has a a toddler) and will want to stay with their husbands. One of his groomsmen has a long-term girlfriend too, they’ll probably be engaged by the time of our wedding. It’s all very complex!
Post # 10
My brother and his wife didn’t pay for anyone else.
Post # 11
We’re not paying for flights/accommodations for anyone to ther than ourselves. We did make sure the VIP’s could afford it before we made any official plans.
Post # 12
I should say that as far as I know, bro and his wife didn’t pay for anyone else. However, my parents are the only ones who probably struggled, and I know they paid. My sister only paid for the flight and ended up rooming with my mom. My little brother crashed on the couch in my grandmother’s room lol.
I had two jobs so I was fine haha. But anyway, we made it work.
My brother’s attitude was pretty much, I’d love for you guys to be there but I understand if you can’t come. He wouldn’t have been mad if we couldn’t afford it.
Post # 13
I am renting two houses for my destination wedding — 1 for his family (parents, both brothers, him, brother’s kids) and 1 for my family. My bridemsaids are staying at the house for my family, as well as some extended family. Each “family” (ie: his parents and my mom) are donating $1000 each to the house rental, but that is still way cheaper than finding hotel rooms for everyone for a few days – so although they are contributing, they are still getting one heck of a deal! We get both houses for 1 week, both have pools, and have about 4-5 bedrooms. We are also holding the rehearsal dinner at one of the houses. I found it to be the most economical (and fun) way to provide housing for his family, my family, extended family and the bridal party. I’m really looking forward to the wedding week!
Post # 14
We are getting married in Cuba and we didnt pay for anyones flights or acommadations. We will be paying for the reception for the wedding. We paid for our whole bridal parties outfits as a courtesy for them paying to come to our wedding
Post # 15
@gingerkitten: We are paying for ALL of the accomodations. We found it much cheaper to rent a home, than to try to get hotel reservations. Also, much more intimate!! We will not be paying for airfare, we tried hard to keep the costs down. So we opted to go for something that is the halfway point for all invited, including oursleves. That way the cost would be less, and no-one would have to commit anything more than a few hours drive time and a full weekend to be there. I will also be paying for hair, makeup, and shoes for the Maid/Matron of Honor, and one Bridesmaid or Best Man. His mother is paying for the personal chef, and dinner afterwards. All other wedding expenses we (fiance and I) are paying for. But, anything else food, drink, and any must have extras for the weekend (non-wedding expenses) will be done on kind of a chip in basis.
I am not sure what is “proper ettiquette” when having a Destination Wedding. I just try to make things as easy as possible for everyone. Of course, I will be putting together a little package for each of them that will be in their rooms prior to their arrival.
Post # 16
We wont be paying for anyone’s flights or accommodation, I don’t really think that would be expected of you.
We are paying for the bridal party’s dresses/suits and anything else that they would usually pay for themselves. But not flights or accommodation.