(Closed) People adding extra guests

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
11167 posts
Sugar Beekeeper

We had two families add a single guest to their RSVP cards. In the end we decided to let it go and say nothing. Rudely enough neither of those added guests came costing us hundreds of dollars in wasted food and rentals.

Looking back I wish I would have said something via a friendly but firm phone call.

Post # 4
4194 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: July 2012 - Baltimore Museum of Industry

No one has- we wrote “__ seat(s) have been reserved in your honor.”

Future Sister-In-Law said to Future Mother-In-Law, if her husband couldn’t make it, she would bring a friend. I told Future Mother-In-Law that since Fiance and I weren’t able to invite all of our friends, I wasn’t okay with that. Fiance agreed, so that was quickly nipped in the bud.  

Post # 5
1638 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

@cacamillis:  I called the offenders and told them in a very sweet way we had reached maximum room in the reception hall. People can’t argue with that! There is no “room”. I found if I claimed money issues, they would offer to pay and I didn’t like that.

Post # 6
597 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

@cacamillis:  My friend had 9 people add a guest to their invite! She was soo upset because its a destination and she was having a tough time on the budget already, but at any rate how rude! She called them up and explained her exhasperation and told them that if they were going to be so inclined to add a guest (she tried being polite at first but they were insisting on their “guest”) then they could expect to be either billed for THEIR guest or formally uninvited. 

She was really hardcore and I don’t suggest this method for just anyone, you really have to channel your inner B for this one. 

*Ultimatly they declined to attend and she was much happier because they were the family that she rarely sees and . My goodness though, it was UGLY. 

If you’re expiriencing any such problem, best of luck to you! 

Post # 8
5662 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

We also put “x amt of seats reserved in your honor” and have had no one cross out and add anyone to their rsvp. it is more than clear. We HAVE had a few though that are now in relationships that they weren’t before, but that has been discussed with us and those have been allowed. Ther are a few people on my  mind I may let bring a guest if they ask, but other than that no random people are going to be allowed. If we do get anyone written in, we’ll be calling and gently reminding them that they cannot bring extra people. Of course if its a parent’s invited guest THEY’ll be doing the calling LOL

Post # 9
10453 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2014

I am definitely putting a spot on the card for “we have reserved X number of seats for you” or something. And I’m going to fill in the names for them and just let them tick Yes or No and pick a meal choice. I have read wayyyyyy too many horror stories about people adding extras and while I hope none of my guests would be that ignorant and rude, I want to avoid it!

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