(Closed) People assume they are invited…share your funny self-invite story!

posted 5 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 61
Member
1398 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

My sisters boyfriend came with her to get ready for my wedding and was planning on also coming to the wedding. (I had never met him before and my sister hasn’t been dating long so I didnt invite him) Well before we even left for the venue he said our wedding was too “white” for him and someone had to take him home.

Post # 62
Member
849 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

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mrssjwilliams:  A backup bridesmaid??? What is that? LOL

Post # 63
Member
120 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2017

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Dfitzy:  OMG story of my life… happened with one of my FI’s aunts… I guess we are now inviting all his aunts and uncles… 

Her I don’t mind, funny thing she was my elementary school principal. The majority of aunts and uncles likely won’t come. But I feel crappy inviting just her and not the others; it will be the thought that counts in this situation.

 

On my side of the family, one of my aunts sent me a message on social media asking me 101 questions because my dad had told her my Fiance and I were engaged. My Fiance and I were hoping to tell our closest people ourselves in person, but so much for that… Needless to say I’ve probably spent less than 5 days in my whole life with her, and we didn’t have much a relationship other than being related by blood. She will probably we surprised when she isn’t invited… 

Post # 64
Member
353 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

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cooperlove:  “To make it worse, DH’s dad emailed me the list of the people he invited and where they lived and told me that the brides family traditionally pays for everyone to fly out.”

WHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAATTTTTTTTTT?? That is outrageous! Here is a list of people you must fly out HAHA! love your response though 🙂

Post # 65
Member
353 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

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mfox89:  I had an acquaintance (gym buddy) ask me if she could be a bridesmaid – i had known her all of maybe 4 months at that point and I just kind of brushed it off thinking theres no way she will ask a second time. Well she did and I had to tell her I had chosen friends I had known for 5+ years and had known since highschool, etc. She took it well but man was that awkward!!

Post # 66
Member
622 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2016

We are having a planned elopement in Mexico. No guests, just a completely private ceremony with an officiant and a photographer only and we have our reasons for doing this. People do not understand this at all. People ask me “so who’s going?” I say “nobody, just us” and they’re like “oh, so just like your family?”. Um, no? I really can’t think of any other way to say private, nobody, and just us. I’ve also had friends say they have plenty of vacation time and would love to come. My mom is getting married soon and texted me the other day to ask when our elopement date was. I told her, and she replied with “okay good, we are planning our honeymoon in Mexico that same week!” OOOOOMMMMGGGGGGGG why can’t we just please have a PRIVATE ceremony?!?!? (Not to mention if they show up, FI’s parents will be livid because we told them it was private.) I am glad that so many people want to celebrate with us which is why we are having a reception for all family and friends when we get home! I guess that’s not enough.

Post # 66
Member
264 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

This was my biggest fear in wedding planning, so I didn’t put anything on social media about our engagement or the wedding until after we were married.  We told people we saw everyday about our engagement.  We had a small wedding (under 50) and I really thought old flakey friends would come out of the woodwork expecting to be invited.

I had one friend who lives on the opposite coast say she couldn’t wait for the wedding, when I told her we got engaged.  I invited her and they declined.

Whenever I told anyone we were engaged or if they asked us about the wedding the first thing I said was that we were planning something small with family.  There were a lot of people who were pretty good friends that we didn’t invite and I felt a little guilty about it.  So that is why I said we were doing something small, so they wouldn’t be waiting and wondering if they would be invited.

I have asked 2 different friends if I was invited.  Both cases they were telling me all about their wedding plans and I was pretty good friends with them, but they hadn’t directly said they were they inviting me.  So I said I don’t want to put you in an awkward position, but are we invited?  They both said yes of course, they had assumed I knew I would be included.    

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