Post # 1
What do you do when people you know try to invite themselves to your wedding (or assume they are coming) ? My Fiance and I are paying for the entire wedding ourselves and, because of that, it will be a pretty small affair. I do have a large family and so that will be taking up the most of our guest list. We will be only inviting a few close friends other than family.
However I’m not sure how to approach this: My mom and my dad are best friends with another couple. When I was growing up they didn’t have many close friends so I’m very happy to see them happy. However, when I saw my mom’s BFF the other day she said “see you in 13 months!” She called me recently and said “hey I’m so sorry if you were wondering what the heck I was talking about when I said that the other day but I was talking about seeing you at your wedding!”
I haven’t even thought about inviting them. They are so nice but I’m not inviting everyone I know and I don’t want to hurt their feelings. I’m not sure how to approach this. I’m not too worried about it right now because it is so far away from the wedding but what do I do when it gets closer to the wedding or she brings it up again?
Post # 3
I’ve been through this with my cousin and his kids. We’re not having kids – we already have 80 guests and he has 5 children – the youngest of which is about 2. A few times the older children have mentioned coming to the wedding – even though the invitation was addressed to my cousin & his wife only, and they have been told by my mum and my nan that we’re not inviting children. This morning (6 days out from the wedding) he rang and asked if he could bring his two older children. My mum explained that everything’s already organised, numbers have been confirmed with the caterer and that we already have 80 guests and our budget is maxed.
Blame it on the budget, people are usually pretty understanding.
Post # 4
Oooh. Tricky. Can your mom run interference for you? I ask because I was in the same boat with my MOHs parents. We’ve been friends since we were 11 and call each other’s parents Mom and Dad too. But her parents aren’t invited (for a number of reasons). I hated to chicken out, but my Maid/Matron of Honor handled it.
Post # 5
Send invitations to the people you want to have at your wedding and that you can afford to have.
If she brings it up again in the interim, grab that opportunity to start letting her know that you have learned that you may not be able to invite everyone you would like to, that you will have to limit numbers due to your budget and large family.
Post # 6
Someone told me that they wanted to come last weekend. I am about 6 weeks out, I am not adding anyone else to the guest list. The lady told me that she would’ve came to my shower, but she didn’t know about it. I was thinking “Yeah, that is because you were not invited (she is not a wedding guest either)”. I thought I was pass this point. Plus, an old friend that I was close to in the past asked my Future Mother-In-Law about an invite. I told my Future Mother-In-Law that I was not inviting her because she has avoided my phone calls and our friendship was one sided.
At this point, I usually just smile and nod my head. lol But, I would just tell her that you are not having a large wedding (or something along the lines of that).