(Closed) People suck [vent]

posted 5 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
5547 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: December 2011

They weren’t in the right but your comment seems unnecessarily backhanded. Sometimes its dumb but being aware if how you come off,  especially at work is important. 

Post # 5
Member
1006 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

Yeah.. I don’t wear crosses but if someone said that to me, I would take it as a nasty remark disguised as a compliment.  If you think it’s pretty, no need to qualify it upfront.  If she wanted to continue the conversation after saying thank you, a cross remark could possibly come up later, but not upfront. 

Edited after your second post- Even if your friend knew, there’s really no reason to even mention religion and open yourself up to others’ criticism. IMO, it’s best to avoid religion and politics and other controversial topics at work. 

Post # 6
Member
3574 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

Sorry, but what you said to her was not nice.  AND, if she knows your views, there was no need to remind her that you don’t like crosses. At least it’s friday!

Post # 7
Member
3771 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013 - Brookfield Zoo

Wow, how totally rude of your coworkers, I’m assuming they knew you could hear them??

Also, I totally understand the “normally I don’t like ___ but I really like that” as not a backhanded thing.  In fact it’s almost more complimentary than normal because you normally don’t like ___!

Post # 10
Member
6825 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

I think most people not just women are going to take what you said as backhanded. You should have just stuck to I like your necklace and left it at that.  I agree what the women said was rude, but then again why do you care what those women said anyway?

Post # 13
Member
1776 posts
Buzzing bee

I also think the comment feels provocative.  It may not have been intended in that way, but there are enough people here saying they feel it’s backhanded, that what you meant, may not be what was communicated.  

 

If something is said in public – within the hearing range of other people – you cannot assume that they will not hear it, or talk about it amongst themselves, or say something to you about it.   But, they should know better than to up the ante by snarking.  Plenty of room for better behavior on all parts. 

 

Post # 14
Member
2708 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

You may not have meant it as a backhanded compliment, but I can definitely see how people would take it that way.  I think you need to remember that even though your friend might have understood and not been offended, if someone overheard that remark, they might think you were being insulting and form a negative opinion of you.

I do agree it wasn’t cool of them to talk about you behind your back.  On the bright side, it’s Friday and only a few more hours until the end of the day!

Post # 15
Member
9917 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2013

Jeez, the issue is that they eavesdropped and judged her for a private conversation, not what she said!

Post # 16
Member
5965 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2018

@hiroshymatetrastar:  Those hags….I hate where you work….I hate it with the fury of a thousand suns…and if I was closeby…I would bring you the stankiest takeout burrito I could find and some beer in a thermos and we would sit in that breakroom…feast on our big, nasty burritos and get sauced…staring at their table THE WHOLE TIME!!! 

Plus…the burrito is a two fold gift…the secondary stank comes around 2:30…when you crop-dust their cubes on your way to the ladies room!

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