(Closed) People who aren't invited are buying off our registries… What do I do??

posted 5 years ago in Gifts and Registries
Post # 3
Member
4336 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

send a thank you note.

Post # 4
Member
9082 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2012

You act like a gracious woman, accept the gift and send a thank you. Simple.

Post # 5
Member
163 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: December 2014

How did they get access to the registry? Invite who you are going to invite, but send them nice thank you notes. 

Post # 8
Member
163 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: December 2014

@echristine:  Ahh…that sounds super pushy to me, I would just send a note. 🙂

Post # 9
Member
163 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@ms-valentine: Most of the time all you have to do is google the couples names and their registries will show up.

I would send a nice thank you note. I have had many friends that I had no expectation of bring invited to their wedding but I love them and wanted to bless them with a small wedding present. If I was not a broke college student I would have bought them a gift just to say good luck and I hope you have a wonderful marriage.

Post # 10
Member
1755 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

Accept graciously and send a thank you note.  People come out of the woodwork and you’ll get gifts from people you’d never expect.  When my mom got married the first time, she said that she got presents from friends of her mom’s that she’d never even met.  It’s one of those weird things that just happens, whether you’re registered or not.

Post # 11
Member
1902 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

We had a couple of uninvited people send gifts or cards. We’re just planning on sending a sincere thank-you note – we didn’t feel the need to invite them just because they bought us something. Also, a lot of people gave us these gifts on the day of the wedding (showed up and dropped them off at my parents’ house), or shortly afterwards, so they almost definitely weren’t fishing for invitations.

Post # 12
Member
1497 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Can you make the registries private?

Post # 13
Member
144 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

You could also sort of adapt the A list B list guest list idea.

 

essentially you budgeted for x number if people, but generally 20% won’t attend. So if your yes rsvps are lower than expected just invite those couple of people who got the registry info. 

Post # 14
Hostess
3572 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

It’s fine. Just say “thanks.” With the costs of weddings today, I think most people understand that wedding invite lists are usually smaller than the couple would like. They should not be assuming they get an invite. But they’re probably just happy for you and want to send you something. 

Don’t sweat this one too much. If they confront you directly, just tell them that you’re having an intimate wedding with mostly family. 

Post # 15
Member
10573 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: January 2011

@ms-valentine:  How is that pushy?

I had extended family who weren’t invited that sent gifts with relatives who did come.

People don’t only give gifts so they get an invitation.

Post # 16
Member
3195 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

@echristine:  um, be excited? lol. i would just send a thank you note, and be gracious. you dont have to invite people because they buy you a gift…that’s not how that works. lol

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