(Closed) People who have “stalkers” enjoy it. I won’t believe otherwise.

posted 7 years ago in The Lounge
Post # 3
Member
6 posts
Newbee

@nontraditionalmiami:My Fiance and I deactivated our facebooks to avoid these problems.. its worked great so far 🙂
 facebook is nothing but drama..

Post # 4
Member
2657 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

Yeah, I completely understand. Personally if I didnt want someone to be friends or anything, I would get tired of messages and friend requests from the same person. I would eventually block that person.

 

Post # 5
Member
1200 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

I had a stalker when I was in college. I was at my internship doing marketing for a mall and he worked at one of the stores. 

 

Eventually he was fired and whenever he’d enter the mall, security would alert me so I could stay in my office.

 

He would call my home phone (parents) and say horrid things about me. He’d get my cell number no matter what I changed it to and call non stop. Since he never caused physical harm to me I could not get a restraining order.

 

The things he’d say… do…. tell others he’d do… just be there. watching.

 

It was terrifying. So no. People who have stalkers don’t want them.

Post # 6
Member
5993 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

@bm72112: FB is just an application – its people that create drama.  ive never had any issues, nor my husband and it seems the same with our group of friends, i cannot recall one issue or comment that has been rude or upsetting or aggressive

in regards to OP, i can understand how some would think its keeping the enemy close so you can see when they go crazy/cross the line but yeah, if you really want someone out of your life delete and block and have zero contact – ignore their existence and hope they will go away because people have died when real stalkers go crazy and they did everything they could (inc legally) to get them out of their lives

Post # 7
Member
1200 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

Oh are we just talking about facebook??

Post # 8
Member
3601 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: January 1992

@CindyRelly: +1

Having a stalker is terrifying. Having a person who annoys you and won’t take a hint and shut up not the same thing at all.

Post # 11
Member
2247 posts
Buzzing bee

My Future Sister-In-Law has a stalker, and she definitely likes it. 

Basically, her ex-husband’s grandfather is loaded.  Whether there is/was a sexual relationship between Future Sister-In-Law and her ex’s grandpa is up for questioning, but he has given her almost every cent of his money.  Last year, he gave her $30 K just to blow on whatever. 

She complains and freaks out when he calls her and leaves her voice mails all day, or when he shows up to her home and job, but she STILL calls him for money. When she had her baby, this guy showed up at the hospital demanding entry into her room, so she had to have round the clock security.

If she didn’t want the stalker, she’d stop contacting him for money and meeting up with him.

Post # 12
Member
1200 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

@nontraditionalmiami: Where I live unless they physically harm you and you have proof you cannot get a restraining order. It’s scary… many women who are murdered by crazy exes have attempted to get restraining orders and were denied.

 

 

Post # 14
Member
5096 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

I get what you’re saying, but I was stalked on FB last summer by someone I hadn’t talked to since 10th grade, and it was terrifying. I blocked him and he immediately put up another account and got even scarier (describing sexual acts, telling me he had a gun with my name on it, etc.)  I contacted the National Center for Victims of Crime Stalking Resource Center, and with their help I was able to verify that he had been deported (for unrelated reasons) and was not able to (legally) enter the country again.  I changed my settings after that so that no one could message me unless they were already my friend.

It totally changed my feelings about my name/email on the internet. For my current position, I have to have my email address publicly available, and I hate it. Luckily he apparently gave up (for now).

Post # 15
Member
5096 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

Anyway, I know you weren’t talking about situations like mine, but the way the post was titled was quite jarring, as someone who was “stalked” and most definitely did not enjoy it.

Post # 16
Member
265 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

@nontraditionalmiami: In response to “don’t get me started on women who date jealous types and then get stalked”

 

 No one deserves to be stalked. It’s a terrifying experience and no one invites that into their lives just because of who they date. By the time you realize someone is a “psycho jealous type” it’s a little late, even if you break up immediately. Those kind of people are also extremely manipulative and often also abusive, so I completely understand how people get sucked in to staying with them. The cycle of abuse is a cycle for a reason, because it tends to repeat. Abusers (emotional or physical) have a way of keeping you in the relationship.

I once went on a single sort-of date with a guy who then stalked me online (thank Jesus he didn’t have any other personal information of mine) for FOUR YEARS. I blocked him on MSN multiple times, but he would create new accounts posing as other friends and continue. I finally stopped accepting new contacts there. He emailed me for years at random. He found me on a dating site and messaged me there. He emailed my friends through the same dating site convinced they were me and raged at them. Eventually I stopped blocking him on things because I wanted to know if his hysteria ever turned into threats. I just stopped responding. I haven’t heard from him in about two or three years now, but still occasionally if I see someone who looks like him I get a stab of fear. 

I willingly went out with that guy once. I did not give him permission to make me fearful or to keep contacting me. Those were his choices, not mine. 

Blame the STALKER, not the victim. 

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