- 8 years ago
- Wedding: August 2011
I did’nt have the best start in life. Many of my childhood memorys are not pleasant, as a child I dealt with this by becoming very selfless. Sounds odd but the sort of thing where I would try and please as much as I could and as often as I could, the adults around me. House work, agreeing with them I was a bad child and looking after my sibling like my own kids that sort of thing. As an adult I know this was wrong so did my best to not to this to friends or at work. I managed it! I met the man of my dreams we had a child, live was pretty great! Then on the birth of our second child we found that our 3 year old eldest boy was autistic, and badly. So again I took who I was and used it to help. I found by being agreeable and looking at it from others veiw points I could make the best decisions! I also found by completely being open, thinking twice on everything I did and being flexable I could understand my son and what was so wrong for him at any given time. This has had a very caring effect on me. I never fight I heardly ever yell or get angry now. My son has improved way more than anyone could have ever have hoped for! The problem is now we are getting married I can’t pick a dress! life is great again and I am truly lucky not just being able to get married but to have no routine issues either. after that very dress I have tried on is great, wonderful infact. Nothing stands out. I feel I have now gone so far the other way I can’t even be selfish picking my wedding dress! So agreeable that I would make do with any one of them and not love it.
I don’t know if anyone will understand this problem but I really don’t know what to do. Or am I just going over board as I have not seen “the one” How do you know when it is “the one”
Any adivse please and I would be greatful.