Post # 17
I completely agree with you! When my FH’s brother got married two years ago, they asked for people to not post their personal photos online without their permission (and they didn’t even have a facebook at the time!). Your wedding photos are special and important! I wouldn’t want an ugly picture of me on my special day being viewed by everyone I do or do not know online.
I think you’re perfectly reasonable to write that…but maybe not in the programs. I’ve heard of photo share cards that are placed at each table or place setting. Maybe that will be better? That way it’s directly “in their face” and they’ve got to see/move the card before they can eat?
Post # 18
I have been to several weddings (bigggg family) even before the FB phenom where there was a professional photographer and photos were not allowed — period. It was on the program, on cards at the tables, announced by the DJ and we were even reminded by the attendants as we were seated in the church. That was a bit exceesive I thought, but it did keep people in check. It is so common not to allow extra photography at weddings here that most people don’t bring a camera or even worry about the cell cams until the reception.
Another thing that we did was have the point and shoot cameras on the reception tables and then collected them at the door in a basket as people picked up their favors and we said “goodbye”. This satisified people’s need to “click” but allowed us to control the content distribution. One nice friend of the family even took several of the cameras home, had the images burned to CD and mailed them to me as an extra “gift”.
Post # 19
Great advice you’ve received so far. I also recommend changing your settings to cut down the chance of stuff being posted to FB.
Here is another alternative that may sound more positive.
Have a photo sharing site that is easy for your guests – no sign-up or login.
Provide cards with the url asking for everyone to post their photos (and videos) just to the site.
Say that Facebook compresses photos and they will not be able to be printed, but the sharing site allows full-resolution downloads.
This way it is not in a program, which people might not read and there is a logical explanation why they shouldn’t use FB.
The company I work at is giving away free photo sharing products, but I don’t want to go against the rules about vendor posting. Send me a message if you’re interested. This idea will also work with other sharing services.
Post # 20
@christalynn11: I agree with changing your settings so you cannot be tagged but that doesn’t stop people from clicking on the album and viewing all your pics. If this individual does this just shoot her a casual message or tell her in person something like this, “Hey gf, do you mind taking down the pictures where I’m not looking too hott. I want people to remember me happy and smiling, not sweaty with cake on my face or my eyes closed. You did take a ton of great pics! Thanks”
Just make it casual and not attacking. She will/should understand.
Post # 21
You can always change your privacy settings. You can make it so only you can see pictures you are tagged in.
Post # 22
can’t you change your setting as to require your permission when someone tags you? That way you can atleast filter what you want tagged and not.
you can’t control what your guests do. that should be a blanket rule that all newly engageds learn… of course we dont.
Post # 23
I wouldn’t put it in the program but i would maybe give a trustworthy friend your facebook password so that she can check it while you are gone and untag any photos that you wouldn’t want to be tagged in. Also have you confronted this girl.. if she is the main reason you want to address this than maybe you should ask her politely not to post unflattering pictures from the wedding and tell her that you would really appreciate her filtering which photos she posts. Worst case scenario block her and she wont be able to tag you!
Post # 24
@Rgeddy As of right now there is no option to require you to give permission before tagging
Post # 25
There is a way to change your options so that tagged pictures are visible only to you and/or make it possible for people to not post to your wall. Aside from that, I’m not sure you can control what someone else chooses to post. It would be great if they respect your privacy, but they might not.
Post # 26
Post # 27
Are you aware that you can set your Facebook privacy settings so that tagging of photos with your name is visible to you only? That wouldn’t stop people from posting, but would at least enable you to untag photos you don’t like before making the rest public (or friends).
Post # 28
@christalynn11: I compeletly understand where you are coming from. I think its a great idea to add a little note to your programs, in fact I may do the same. We have a guest from Fiance side of the family that is very facebook happy. She posted her Brother-In-Law and SIL’s wedding pics before they did (they actually never posted pics from their intimate wedding), and as if the pics where not enough she actually posted video she took with her own camera of them exchanging their vows.
The funny thing is the person who posted this on facebook noted on her ceremony programs, her request that guest not take photos at all. Yet she posted pics and video of someone else’s wedding. (She also posted pics of her SIL right after she had given birth, baby barely cleaned off she was there snaping and posting away.) She is the person I am most concerned about, personally I do not want pics from our wedding on facebook. I will choose one or two of our pro photos to post and that is it. I’m glad you created this thread, gives me some great ideas of how to avoid this.
Post # 29
Ditto on the advice regarding changing your privacy settings on FB. Because of my career, I’m very careful about FB postings. I’ve changed the privacy settings to where no one can see pictures or videos of me that have been tagged. Pls PM me if you need instructions on how to do that.
You can also have your MC/DJ/Bestman/etc announce, during the reception/at the end of his/her speech, (with a lot of humor!) that the bride and groom would like some privacy and prefer that the pics are not posted on FB. Also ask your guests that if they do ultimately post the pictures, that they set the privacy settings to “friends only” instead of “everyone”.
Ultimately, you can’t control what other people do, but hopefully your friends and family will respect your privacy and preference. Good luck!
Post # 30
Thanks for all of the feedback…
I am reasonably savvy and DID understand that I can change my privacy settings. That isn’t really my issue. It is that I would like to be able to post photos of MY OWN WEDDING if I choose to do so. Just because you aren’t tagged doesn’t mean it isn’t you – and people will recognize you. People WILL go looking for photos of our wedding (including his ex wife) and I would just rather them not be posted online.
Just because my privacy setting are closed off doesn’t mean my friends and family have done the same.
Post # 31
Everyone keeps mentioning the privacy settings but that doesn’t protect you if this person doesn’t use their privacy settings. All their friends and friends of friends could see your pictures.