Post # 1
Okay, so the boy and I have been looking at rings for about a month and I am completely overwhelmed.
At first, boy wanted to “surprise” me with with a ring. But I wear almost no jewelry on a daily basis and all of the jewelry I wear when we go out is very statement-y. So he was lost. Eventually he consulted one of his male friends who just got engaged and said friend recommended that my boy let me pick the ring. (Apparently friend spent a lot of time and money on a ring his fiance is already talking about upgrading…)
So now we are looking together, mostly on the internet because a) we live in an expensive city and b) it allows us the most options….with b) comes the problems. I find a ring, I love it, then I wonder if I REALLY love it. One minute I want a diamond, the next I realize all the things we could do with the money we would need to spend on a diamond, then the next minute I want a huge cocktail ring because they are so dreamy, then I think “But can you wear that everyday?”
Now, after about 100 or so rings considered seriously, I bemoaned to the boy: “Knowing you were the one was so easy! Why is this so hard?!”
So, ladies who have been aiding in picking the ring, how did you know it was THE ring? And if anyone else has any insights, lemme know. I am closer to picking the DRESS than I am to actually picking a RING…this is not a wise place to be! 🙂
Post # 3
I picked my ring out. I wanted inexpensive, and a little ethereal.
We ( my best friend, my FI’s best friend, and I) went to three different stores in the mall.
After ending up in Kay Jewelers, I tried on ring after ring and was getting nowhere. My best friend, and his best friend decided they were going to start helping me decide.
They picked rings I never thought I’d like, but his best friend ended up picking this gorgeous ring out for me. I tried it on, and loved it but wasn’t totally sure. We tried on more, but I kept coming back to that ring. It was intricate yet still simple enough to be worn every day. I realized soon after that I was “in love” with it, and his best friend showed him which one.
I got a second proposal with that ring. My first ring was a blue glass blown ring from the docks at Wrightsville Beach, where he proposed. Originally, he couldn’t afford a nice ring and now I have one perfect for me.
In the end, I got exactly what I wanted. I got him.
No worries. You’ll find the right ring. 🙂
Post # 4
Yeah, the boyfriend and I have been talking about it and I just can’t get over the fact that for the price of a piece of jewelry, I can go on vacation. That’s crazy. And I like you wear little to no jewlery so I find things I think I like and wonder if I really will like them or if eventually I will think it is stupid.
Post # 5
1) set a budget. I had to do at LEAST $500 (his beliefs), but I refused to look at rings over $2000.
2) decide on a stone. Easy for me – I like green, and I had an heirloom diamond. So – “if the center stone isn’t green, use grandma’s stone.”
3) decide on a width. I have smallish hands, so I want a narrow band – no more than three mm.
4) pick five examples. I gave him three 2mm rings (one with five small stones and celtic knotwork, a three stone with very pretty setting, and a plain three-stone), one 3-4mm ring with yellow gold accents, knotwork, and tsavorite center, and one ring that I prefaced was too big for me but gorgeous (think Lord of the Rings, Galadriel’s ring mixed with Arwen’s pendant.)
Remember – you CAN go to Wal-Mart or some department store and get a ring of similar quality for MUCH cheaper.
Post # 6
I don’t yet have an e-ring, but I do know the one that I want.
1) find the stone shape(s) you like
2) note styles you like (ie, solitaire, three-stone, halo, etc)
3) Do you want silver, yellow gold, white gold, platinum? What metal type?
4) Will you have a wedding band too? Do you want a set? Does it need to sit flush?
5) Try on styles you think you like and ask yourself, “Do I see myself loving/wearing this ring for the rest of my life?”
If you truly love more than one style, perhaps you could give your top 3 or top 5 picks to your SO and let him surprise you! This way he’d know you’ll love the ring but be able to give you that element of surprise.
Post # 7
cyneswith and chicchick both have great advice, I think the only thing I would add is to go try on some stuff. Knowing you live in an expensive area I would stay away from custom made jewelers, you might fall in love with something unique and impossible to find later. But if try on to help you decide on the areas they listed, I think you can find something really close to what you like somewhere else.
Post # 8
You have to try rings on. You won’t get a sense of what looks good on your hand just by internet pics. One thing I can advise is if you work in a field in which you use your hands a lot (teacher, scientist, doctor, chef, artist etc. etc.) then I would not recommend that you get a big rock simply because they can be cumbersome for daily wear.
The other bees gave you great advice, but here’s one other thing to remember: there is an awful lot of pressure put on the engagement ring. I think a better way to think of it is that it’s the FIRST ring you’ll get, not the last. You’ll have plenty of other milestones to garner some bling–first child, first bigtime job, new home, 40th birthday, 40th wedding anniversary… So don’t freak out at the thought that this has to be the ring to end all rings. You just have to like it, that’s all.
I’m a pretty mercurial girl when it comes to jewelry so I have 2(!) wedding rings and one engagement ring and I switch them around all the time. One of the bands goes nicely with my e-ring, but I will often times wear the band on my left and the e-ring on my right. My other band is the Cartier trinity band which I just wear on it’s own (although sometimes with one of the other rings on my other hand). DH’s rule is just that I have to be wearing at least one of the three rings on “that finger” at all times! Point is, there’s no rule that once you buy the ring it has to be on your finger until the end of time.
Post # 9
I totally agree with JennyWI & Phofe2774, it’s imperative to try things on. When I looked online, I thought I’d want either a halo/pave or solitaire. While halo/pave styles rings are goreous (IMO), they looked like too much for me. I’m kind of a plain jane, and I couldn’t imagine wearing that style daily. I have a friend who has a GORGEOUS halo style e-ring that I adore, but that style didn’t look right on MY hand. SO and I decided pave would more than likely not be an option is not only because we’re both rather simple people but also because of the durability factor. I don’t want to deal with losing stones and having to get my ring serviced frequently. That helped narrow it down for us. We’re both pretty traditional, and a solitaire will mostly reflect our style and be “in style” forever.
I would suggest looking at chain stores (ie Jareds, Helzberg, Zales, etc) first as they tend to have the widest variety of e-ring styles with diamonds that are already set. If you choose to order your ring online or look at a private jeweler, you may have a smaller selection in stock for you to actually try. Also, seeing a setting on your hand without a diamond is waaaaay different than seeing it with the center stone, and a lot of privately owned stores have diamonds and settings separate. Until you know the style you’re looking for, I wouldn’t suggest looking at the diamond and setting separately.
Don’t be afraid to look at department stores or even Walmart like another bee posted! I would take advantage of every opportunity to try on a few things you may like. I’ve gone out solo and tried at least 15 or so different rings at EVERY chain store in my area and we have no intention of buying my ring from any of those places. Take your time figuring out what you like by trying on what you think you may like because you won’t know if it’s for you until you put it on!