(Closed) Pissed

posted 6 years ago in Emotional
  • poll: Did I over react?
    Yes : (37 votes)
    43 %
    No : (37 votes)
    43 %
    Maybe : (12 votes)
    14 %
  • Post # 3
    1729 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    I hate it when people say they’ll they do something and then don’t do it. However, I’ve found that the “artsy” vendors have been the hardest to deal with…photographers, music people, etc.

    Take a deep breath, it’s going to be ok. You have plenty of time 🙂

    Post # 5
    942 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: July 2012

    You definitely didn’t overreact, this would bother me too. But, I know what’s its like to be wedding planning and forever trying to get things in order. If she does weddings often, then she should know better.

    Post # 7
    388 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    I’m sorry you are having trouble, things you coul do without when planning a wedding! i just had to post as it always brings a smile to my face when I see posts entitled “pissed” as it means drunk here and so I always imagine a drunk bride-to-be haha

    Post # 8
    2863 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

    If your wedding isn’t until July then yeah you probably should slow your roll. Wanting to cuss someone out over a list of songs sounds silly because it is. Take a deep breath, find a new vendor and possibly try and be more level headed with them in the future. 

    Post # 9
    3697 posts
    Sugar bee

    Had you given her any guidelines as to *what type* of music you wanted for the wedding (i.e. you wanted classical music/contemporary/gospel/jazz standards/hymns and sacred music, etc.)? Because, as a wedding musician, if you want a “list of songs” but it’s otherwise left wide open, you’re going to get something all over the map and not really useful to you. Which will probably irritate you and make you frustrated with my services. She was actually probably trying to do you a favor by waiting until she had another opportunity to talk to you. I do think she could have done a better job of articulating it, but I would give her the benefit of the doubt instead of getting angry.

    Post # 10
    4439 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: January 2013 - Harbourfront Grand Hall

    @MrsSmith2013:  You did NOT overreact, she’s completely unprofessional.  Her other priorities mean nothing to you, a paying customer.

    I would have DEMANDED a refund.

    Post # 11
    11747 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    She could have been nicer about it, but generally her message about your wedding being in July and her dealing with other weddings first was fine to say. I asked my officiant about sending materials to me early and he just kindly told me no, he’d send them closer to the wedding.  He has his reasoning so I went with it. Not anything to get upset about.

    And all you’ve really paid is a deposit which to me is insurance to hold the specified date.  You technically haven’t paid her to provide you any services yet, so that’s not the best argument for me. 

    Post # 12
    3618 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: November 2011

    I would definitely ask for my deposit back and throw in something about breach of contract if she puts up a fight since she can’t provide you a song list as you discussed. 

    From my experience, if they get shady after you give them a deposit, RUN. My baker was like this and it did not end well for me.

    Post # 13
    1024 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

    If it were closer to wedding time, I would say you were not overreacting in the slightest. BUT it’s not that close..you have plenty of time. She is being totally unprofessional, but you should calm down.

    Post # 14
    1306 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    None of the things she listed are your concern. If she is too stressed out, she shouldn’t be adding to her plate.

    That being said, I suggest you compile  alist yourself of any songs you want in advance. Send her an e-mail telling her you just wanted a generic list of songs so you could listen to them in advance to cut your meeting time down. She can send them when convenient for her but really, a preofessional singer should have a list madeto give to anyone at any time.

    Post # 15
    221 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: November 2014

    I would have been upset too only because she kept saying she’d get to it and never did. If you are a vendor or providing a service, lack of responding is a deal breaker for me. If you say you are going to do something do it and if something comes up LET the person know beforehand not days later.

    Post # 16
    280 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    I’ll play Devil’s Advocate and say you’re overreacting a bit.  I do understand the need for communication and a timely deposit so you can stay on top of your finances, however your wedding isn’t until July.  Your vocalist sounds like a VERY busy woman and honestly, I would give her some slack considering your wedding isn’t for seven months.  Now, if she continues to behave like this in April or May then that’s a problem.  But like she said, she is an extremely busy person and your wedding is not the only one on her agenda. 

    If you haven’t already canceled her services, I would take a breather, decide on a follow up schedule in case you haven’t heard back from her, and the next time you speak with her, stay calm and don’t get irate.  Even though you paid a deposit, she reserves every right to refuse you service if she deems you a threat, just like you have every right to choose a different vocalist.  Good luck!

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