(Closed) Planned most of the wedding without a proposal..

posted 7 years ago in Proposals
Post # 3
Member
99 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I can certainly understand the feeling of waiting the element of surprise. However, maybe you could look at it this way. Most brides have discussed marriage, etc. with their SO’s before the proposal. Some even ring shop together, myself included. So, that being the case, most proposals aren’t REALLY a surprise, because you know it’s coming. But, if you were to tell your fiancé that you would like the surprise factor, I’m sure he could do the proposal in a way you wouldnt expect, therefore giving you the “surprise” proposal you have dreamed of. :)My Fiance and I had talked marriage, picked out the ring, finalized a lot of the details, and I knew he had the ring in the house. He did it when I LEAST expected it. I slept in one weekend so he was already up (watching football of course) when I got up. I walked into the living room and it looked like a tornado had gone through. Ugh. I’m such a neat freak, and I was sooo irritated. So, I was complaining and picking up his dirty dishes to take to the kitchen. I walked through the doorway and on the table was roses, candles, a ring box, and a sign that said “Will you?”. I immediately teared up and turned around. He was standing right behind me, and I just threw my arms around him and hugged him for like five minutes. Finally, he puled away and said he guessed that meant yes? I was like yes! Of course! He put the ring on me and we spent the rest of the day cuddled on the couch talking about everything under the sun and watching chick flicks. 😉 So you see, my non-surprise proposal was a surprise after all. 🙂

Post # 4
Member
83 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

A friend of mine started planning their wedding before he actually proposed.  He was saving up for the ring.  But they both knew they wanted to get married and they started the planning.  It’s the fact you both want to get married!!!  The ring will come.  And once it does come, you can just enjoy it, without worrying about the details, cause they are mostly done!! =)

Post # 5
Member
128 posts
Blushing bee

I think your over organization has ruined the surprise/excitment factor for you. U can’t really do anything about it  as you’ve booked everything and you want the wedding so soon. But mention it to your Fiance, maybe he could do a special proposal? 

Post # 6
Member
647 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

Mrs. Avocado was blogging for Weddingbee before receiving her ‘official’ proposal.  These days I think the actual proposal with ring is kind of a superfluous step for a lot of couples.  You both have talked about marriage and are planning for that, without a ring.  I would consider you engaged.  A piece of jewelry doesn’t make an engagement.

Post # 6
Member
14658 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

With or without the ring, you sound pretty engaged to me.  If he’s been on board with planning and getting married (which is really the point of being engaged)… you’re engaged, you just dont have your sparkly symbol yet.

Post # 6
Member
14658 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

double post

Post # 6
Member
14658 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

ugh, triple

Post # 6
Member
647 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

Mrs. Avocado was blogging for Weddingbee before receiving her ‘official’ proposal.  These days I think the actual proposal with ring is kind of a superfluous step for a lot of couples.  You both have talked about marriage and are planning for that, without a ring.  I would consider you engaged.  A piece of jewelry doesn’t make an engagement.

Post # 7
Member
1489 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

Go ahead with your plans…

 

Post # 8
Member
122 posts
Blushing bee

hey, dont stress my love when u look back u prob wont even remember all this because it will be overshadowed by the most beautiful wedding to the man you love.

I havent bought or booked anything, but i have decided on nearly everything i want and my wedding book is filling at a rapid rate, but guess what?

I havent got two pennies to rub together ( i’m from the UK), I prob wont be getting married for at least a couple of years and although he has hinted that he will say yes, I am proposing to my boyfriend with a watch I havent bought yet.

It really isn’t about how u do any of it, just that u get married to the person who is going to make you happy for the rest of forever.

 

dont worry when the ring comes it will be special xxx

Post # 9
Member
1109 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

We were planning before he had the ring, he got antsy waiting for it because it took like 8 weeks to be special ordered, so he  just asked me one night. Then he got the ring a couple weeks later. It sounds like you are engaged, why can’t you announce it? If anyone says you’re not engaged because you don’t have a ring yet – promptly remove them from your life. I can understand people seeing the ring as confirmation that the engagement is sincere, but you’ve planned the whole wedding almost. Your Fiance sounds like a good guy, it will be exciting to get a beautiful peice of jewelry from him believe me.

I think the days of women being totally surprised by proposals has passed. Women work and have their own houses sometimes, it would be ridiculous to spring marriage on somebody that’s already so settled down. I think women deserve to have a say in the decision to get married, more than just being given a ring and having to answer on the spot. Deciding together to get married is more common than you think. I know a great couple who never had an engagement, they decided to get married and had a ceremony in their living room, they’re no less married than couples who had a big dramatic proposal.

You love each other and you’re ready to be married to him, that’s very exciting!! And change your fb status, you’re engaged Tongue out

Post # 10
Member
828 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Did the both of you plan all of these things together, or did you plan all of these things?

Post # 11
Member
95 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

We talked about getting married before we got married and even went ring shopping together and there was no surprise there but it was fun and a memory for us to keep. He did surprise me after words when he finally got the ring. We weren’t even going to have the ring because it was hard times financially and I didn’t want him to spend extra money on it. For a while, I myself was planning without one. Also one of my friends never really got a ring either, just some fake one from walmart way later because she couldnt get other men to stop hitting on her. Not having a ring does not mean your not engaged. Look at what you have already accomplished! your day is on the way!

Post # 11
Member
95 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

We talked about getting married before we got married and even went ring shopping together and there was no surprise there but it was fun and a memory for us to keep. He did surprise me after words when he finally got the ring. We weren’t even going to have the ring because it was hard times financially and I didn’t want him to spend extra money on it. For a while, I myself was planning without one. Also one of my friends never really got a ring either, just some fake one from walmart way later because she couldnt get other men to stop hitting on her. Not having a ring does not mean your not engaged. Look at what you have already accomplished! your day is on the way!

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