planned pregnancy and not happy

posted 3 years ago in Pregnancy
Post # 2
Member
939 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

Ekat :  Hi, if this was a planned pregnancy why are you suddenly feeling upset? Is this something you both agreed on or something your husband pushed you to do?

Post # 3
Member
1980 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2016 - Sussex, UK

As you are 4 weeks pregnant I’m assuming you just found out. Give it a few days to sink in. It’s the most life-changing thing you can go through. I’m pro-choice as it’s your body but I don’t really understand wanting an abortion when you’ve been trying for a baby unless you weren’t sure and werr talked into trying or you have depression, anxiety etc.  

Post # 4
Member
10020 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2012

You have a lot of time to become adjusted to the pregnancy and giving birth, so it’s ok and perfectly normal to not be quite ready this early.  However, have you completely changed your mind about having this baby?  What made you change your mind?

Post # 5
Member
1225 posts
Bumble bee

Ekat :  Please make an appointment to speak with a therapist.  It is best if you have someone objective/unbiased to speak openly to about your situation.  No one can say whether your feelings are legitimate or not, but it is extremely important that before you embark on such a long and difficult (and rewarding!) journey like parenthood, you are sure you want a child(ren).

Also: I generally try to avoid referring to/bringing up previous posts but it seems you also suffered from cold feet/last minute regrets before your wedding (I’m assuming your husband is the same person from your post 3 years ago).  Could this also be a case of extreme anxiety/nerves (again, I assume you resolved your concerns/issues if you went ahead with the wedding)?  Alternatively, maybe you just don’t want to have a baby with your husband, because you still have doubts about your relationship?

Anyway, I still think seeking therapy is your best next move.

Post # 6
Member
6225 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2016

I’ve heard several women experience regrets when they first found out they were pregnant- realizing how much their lives would change, thinking it would take longer to get pregnant than it did. Like other posters, I’m wondering why you’re now feeling like you might not want to continue the pregnancy. Has something happened or changed?

Post # 7
Member
9946 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: City, State

Reading your past post.

Did you marry the man you didn’t want to marry three years ago? You even mentiond three years ago you didn’t want to have children with this man. Is it the same person?

Post # 11
Member
5038 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2017

I would give it some time.  I am pro choice and believe that abortion is acceptable within reason.  But this was a planned pregnancy.  If I were you I would own my decision and follow through with bringing this child into the world.

Post # 12
Member
6836 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2016

Ekat :  Like the other PPs, I need some more information. You say you “hate it.” What exactly do you hate? The idea of having a baby in general? Losing your independence? What it’s doing to your body? Have you discussed how upset/unhappy you are with your husband? Were you fully onboard with the idea of babies before or did your husband pressure you into it? 

Post # 14
Member
1332 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2016 - Painswick Church and the Falcon Hotel

Give it some time 

Post # 15
Member
1025 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

Were you suffering with anxiety/depression before this? Talk to someone… there are meds that can help too.

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