(Closed) Planning a wedding out of town… flustrated! Anyone else?

posted 7 years ago in Logistics
Post # 3
Member
5183 posts
Bee Keeper

@HappilyEverAfter54: I know what you are going through. Fiance and I are planning a wedding in Colorado. Luckily most of our vendors have been VERY accomodating and understanding of our situations (i.e. only being able to come to CO for a couple days around Xmas ). But it IS really stressfull. 

Post # 4
Member
192 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I am right there with you…I am 6-7 hours away from my venue so I wouldn’t mind your hour commute at all! It is definitely more challenging, but I have used a lot of recommendations from my friends that have recently had weddings in the area where my wedding is to try to narrow down my searches for vendors. It has been really helpful. I do hate being so far away from my dress though!! 🙂 

Post # 6
Member
2142 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

We planned from 1.5 (normal) to 25 hours away (when I was in PA), it’s doable but can be such a pain. We did a lot of email and phone correspondence because we had one car and it’s a really boring, long drive (having done it at 3a it is awful). I relied on Darling Husband to do a lot of because I HATE phones.

Post # 7
Member
3316 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

We planned our Massachusetts wedding from Maryland.  However, we didn’t even try to visit the area beforehand.  We used phone, e-mail, and checking things out on the Web to select all of our vendors, and just showed up the day before the wedding.  Then again, we kept things simple.  We rented a big house for ourselves and all our guests, and had pizzas delivered there for our “rehearsal dinner.”  And our reception was just a luncheon in a restaurant.

Post # 9
Member
1474 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2011 - Bent Creek Winery (Livermore, California); Reception: Family Residence (San Ramon, California)

I planned a chunk of my California wedding from New York, so I can totally relate to your frustrations. The whole phone/email tag thing was not fun. And the three-hour time difference was killer. Hang in there, though! A lot of vendors are understanding, which was nice. 🙂

Post # 11
Member
1474 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2011 - Bent Creek Winery (Livermore, California); Reception: Family Residence (San Ramon, California)

@HappilyEverAfter54: Don’t feel bad, for me or for meeting early with your caterers. I mean, it is what it is, and thankfully when it comes to weddings, the best vendors are understanding. 

And three months before the wedding, I moved back to California, and because our reception was at my parents’ house, it was super easy to do all the decorations. I set everything up days before the wedding, so I feel like I had it very easy at the end, which more than made up for any difficulties at the beginning. 🙂

Post # 12
Member
670 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

We’re planning a PA wedding from TX. In some ways it has been nice because we can do a lot of research online and then just meet with the top contenders when we’re in town…it has definitely forced us to just make some decisions that I can otherwise imagine myself going back and forth on (for instance we only visited a few venues when we were home for 3 days earlier in the summer, if we lived nearby I can imagine visiting tons more even though we found the perfect one pretty quickly.) On the other hand, it is making it harder to enjoy visits home cuz every minute seems crammed with wedding related tasks. I’m super busy with work this fall and can’t wait for Thanksgiving, but already know it won’t be very relaxing.

Post # 13
Member
3316 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

@HappilyEverAfter54:  Actually, the only part we were really nervous about was getting the marriage license.  There is normally a three-day waiting requirement, which was of course an issue with us just arriving the day before.  We had been told that the court procedure for getting a waiver of the waiting period was pretty simple, but it was still a bit nerve-wracking not to be sure we could get the marriage license in time.

Otherwise, though, it wasn’t bad.  We’d seen pictures online, both indoor and outdoor, of our accommodations, the synagogue where we got married, and the restaurant where we had our reception.  We’d had e-mail and phone conferences with the rabbi who was our officiant.  We had checked with the rabbi to make sure that the space was large enough for our 8′ by 8′ chuppah (wedding canopy), which was the major ceremony decoration.  The restaurant was a Legal Sea Foods, so we were familiar with the food, even though we’d never been to the specific one in Massachusetts.  We picked one of the Teleflora bouquets, so we’d seen pictures of that before ordering it from the Teleflora florist in the town where we were getting married.  We’d had a chance for an in-person interview of our photographer (at which he showed us a sample album), when he was on a sightseeing trip to Washington, DC.  We’d scoped out where the nearest Whole Foods store was so we could pick up the challah for the blessing over bread.  The hair and make-up person was the one we were least sure of, but we figured that if necessary, we could DIY or do without if the person didn’t work out.  So overall, we felt quite confident that things were going to go well–and in fact, they did.

Post # 14
Member
206 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

Hang in there!! We are planning a wedding that is 4-5 hours away depending on the highway conditions.  I know that it can be frustrating.  I know for us, it seems that every long weekend that we have to go back to visit our friends and family, we are trying to do something for the wedding also.  For example, over the remembrance day long weekend, we are driving back and doing a cake tasting.  And I know that when we go back for Christmas there is a long list of things for us to do as we might only be back one maybe two long weekends.  I am lucky enough that I can go back 3 weeks before the wedding to deal with last minute things.  My Fiance will join me one week before the wedding.  I am finding that most of my vendors are very good at replying via email.  That’s how I have been doing all of my correspondence. 

Post # 15
Member
645 posts
Busy bee

I know how you feel… it’s very frustrating planning a wedding from out of town. My Fiance and I are having two weddings. Our first wedding is in FL and we currently live in CA. It’s a world of planning and we’re only going back to visit one more time before the wedding. We’ll be taking care of everything as far as meeting with our vendors for the first time, taking engagement pics, and having our tastings too. It’s just so stressful… especially with a 3 hour time difference. 

Email is key for us. The most important thing that i’d say would be having a contact in the city where you wil be getting married. That way if you ever need someone to go check out a vendor for you in person… they can be there for you. 

Good luck!

Post # 16
Member
775 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

I know how you feel! I’m planning a wedding that is 12 hours away. I live in PA and it’s in Michigan. Luckily I used to work in the area I’m having the wedding, so I know some stuff,but otherwise,I have to figure it out on my own. I’ve had a LOT of issues with untrustworthy business owners. I had to find a COMPLETELY new dj and ceremony/reception venue because mine did not follow through with communication or with what we agreed upon. It’s hard being so far away and stressful!

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