(Closed) Planning a wedding… wanted to know how gay and straight weddings differ??

posted 6 years ago in LGBTQ
Post # 3
Member
383 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

Just like with any other wedding, there is no right or wrong!  It’s about whatever feels right for the couple. My Fiance and I are planning our wedding right now and we are just trying to make it as much “us” as possible.  I want to incorporate some of my Mexican traditions such as the lazo and arras, I plan to wear a suit, she’s wearing a dress, we each have 3 bridesmaids all in dresses, I want mariachis for cocktail hour, she wants a string quartet for the ceremony, we want ice cream instead of a cake and the list goes on!  Talk to your friends and find out what they want.  Just like any other wedding it can be as traditional or untraditional as they want.  

Post # 4
Member
370 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

I would plan it as any wedding. Ask lots of questions, give your opinion, etc. Treat it as any wedding with two individuals with two individual opinions. They’ll tell you what they want just as any other client would.

Post # 5
Member
789 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

I can’t imagine they’d be any different. My life-long best friend had a civil partnership ceremony in London 5 years ago and they had the most beautiful luncheon after the ceremony. There was a pre-ceremony champagne hour on a terrace of their building overlooking the Thames & the London Eye. Just gorgeous! The evening after the luncheon they had a fun casual party with hors d’ouvres in their flat. It was a lovely day! Certainly no different from any other wedding. Plan whatever the couple wants and is special to them. Have fun! And congrats on your own recent marriage 🙂

Post # 6
Member
1676 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

I think the biggest difference is going to be how to handle the things that are traditionally male-female roles. For example, who throws the bouquet? How are you going to announce the couple? Will they be Mrs. and Mrs. Smith? Other than that, you can certainly take as much or as little from a traditional straight wedding as you like.

Post # 7
Member
1508 posts
Bumble bee

I think the biggest differences are going to be mostly coordination-wise. Will both brides walk down the aisle? Will they walk together, or will one wait for the other? If both come down the aisle, will they both have their father walk them etc. As well as traditional bridesmaids on the ladys side and groomsmen on the mans side, who will stand on either side? As long as you ask lots of questions and find out how they envision their day, you will do fine!

Post # 8
Member
5 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: October 2012

My Fiance and I (both females) are currently planning our wedding.  Early on we discussed what it was that we wanted out of the wedding, which has helped guide us through the planning process.  One of the biggest things we are trying to steer clear of is the idea of traditional gender roles, as I think this is important not only for the same-sex couples, but also for those guests not too familiar with same-sex relationships.  I don’t think that there are any do’s and don’ts…but before you start planning, talk to them about what they want, their expectations, and how they as a couple want to be portrayed.  Good luck!  Laughing

Post # 10
Member
102 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

My wedding is uber-traditional. We’re both in white frocks, walking down the aisle together to a service based on the Anglican service of blessing for straight civil married couples. Then there’s a marquee reception. So ask questions and find out what their vision is! It’s all about the couple.

Post # 11
Member
332 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

I agree with what’s been said so far… especially about the traditional things such as walking down the aisle and the dances.  My fiancee and I are still trying to sort out what we want to pull from tradition and what we want to create on our own.  In a way it’s actually really exciting having the freedom to create a special day that is completely meaningful to the two of you without worrying about the ‘right’ way to do it! Just have fun with it!  And I’m sure your friend will appreciate all your efforts!

Post # 12
Member
1 posts
Wannabee

I agree with everyone else that you should talk to the couple and see what they prefer and that most of the wedding will be no different than a “straight wedding”. You should check out 14stories.com they plan gay weddings and they have a great blog about different issues that can come up and some great ideas for the logistics of everything. Hope it helps! 🙂

Post # 13
Member
3569 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

Ive been several samesex and to be honest there isnt a big difference. The only thing I can think of is deciding who goes down the aisle first.

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