(Closed) Planning before getting engaged?

posted 6 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
Member
1404 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

@gangan:  I don’t think you crossed an imaginary line. You know your SO has the ring, and a proposal is imminent so there’s no harm getting a headstart on shopping. Just don’t go buying the dress until the ring is on your finger! πŸ˜‰

Post # 4
Member
2523 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

I don’t think you crossed a line, either.

We’re not getting “officially” engaged until Thanksgiving, and yesterday I bought some jewelry for our JOP ceremony in January.

Once I saw on “Say Yes to the Dress,” this girl bought a dress without a proposal or even without talking to her boyfriend about marriage…now that’s crossing a line, In My Humble Opinion.

Post # 5
Member
1784 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

Shoes can go with things other than a wedding dress, so I think you’re okay. Buying a dress or veil would be going a little too far. 

Post # 6
Hostess
7561 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: January 2013

@Jabberwocky:  Agreed. 

I think you’re fine so far but maybe hold off on planning anything else before you become officially engaged. 

Post # 7
Member
1832 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: January 2013

You bought a pair of shoes πŸ˜‰ What line? I see no line?

Post # 8
Member
1297 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

I think if marriage has been discussed, agreed upon, and especially if a ring’s been bought, it’s okay to do some planning.

Some people get all judgey about it, but honestly, I wish I had started planning sooner. We only had a 7-month engagement and for me, it would have been easier if I had started sooner.

I guess I’d advise just not putting down big money (dress, venue, catering, etc) until it’s official.

Post # 9
Member
110 posts
Blushing bee

@Jabberwocky:  my thoughts exactly!

I was afraid OP would say she ordered something like a shipment of centerpieces or booked a venue or something.. I really don’t think shoes are a big deal! 

I totally understand the feeling though: you’re so excited about something that you want to get the ball rolling already, but you’re scared of jinxing it if you get going before it’s time.. Not sure if that made any sense, but yes, I totally fight myself on stuff like that too.

Post # 11
Member
486 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

Haven’t you ever heard the phrase, “If the shoe fits, buy it in every color”? You’re just living by the rule. πŸ™‚ I think most women are guilty of doing a liiiiitle something before we start planning. I say you’re clear.

Post # 12
Member
9570 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2013

Don’t feel guilty, you know you will be engaged soon. Nothing wrong with buying the shoes if they’re perfect or browsing online for ideas!

Post # 13
Member
14 posts
Newbee

@gangan:  You voiced my feelings exactly at how waiting is filled with confusion, ambivalence, and can be ridiculous at times.  Still, at this point, you know its coming – I’m guilting of a small bit of planning myself.  And hey, one item off the planning list! πŸ™‚

Post # 14
Member
279 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

I don’t think you crossed a line. I agree with PP…the gown shouls wait, but smaller items are fair game…especially if there’s limited supply or a sale. πŸ™‚ I haven’t purchased anything while waiting, but I’ve already picked a color and have my photographer and DJ chosen (worked with them at other events).

Post # 15
Member
986 posts
Busy bee

If you’re a shoe person, I would get them! Especially since you know there is a ring and proposal coming soon. πŸ™‚

Post # 16
Member
2023 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

Get to shoes!!!

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