(Closed) planning ceremony without communion

posted 7 years ago in Catholic
Post # 3
Member
1 posts
Wannabee
  • Wedding: November 2011

I was in the same boat. The Fr. who was going to marry us(in his church)wouldn’t do a full mass because I’m(male) not Cathloic. However, we moved the church to a new loctaion–closer to home–and now he will provide a full mass because the pastor there doesn’t have an issue with it.

 

My agrument is this; They provide a FULL mass everday, and several times on Sunday. None-Cathloics attent church on even given day, for whatever reason, and it’s never an issue. HOWEVER, throw in a marriage and now it’s wrong? I thought the catholic church was pro-marriage, yet it’s been nothing but a pain for my Fiance and me–over several issues, not just the full mass problems(which was minor when compared to the other issues we’ve had)

Post # 4
Member
3166 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

@HappyNOrange: the Church is pro-marriage but they still work within certain constraints. The priest didn’t think that a full mass was appropriate so you found a new church – problem solved. It sounds like you’re better off since this wasn’t your only problem.

My priest left the decision for whether or not we wanted a full mass up to us (FH is not Catholic). We decided against it since only 1/4 of the guests would be able to partake and a wedding should be about unity not division.

anyways – OP got more responses in this thread: http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/catholic-ceremony-elements

Post # 5
Member
1553 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

The ceremony without Mass is very similar to the one with Mass.  In both, you still have the opening parts of Mass, the Liturgy of the Word, a homily, and then the Rite of Marriage.  

The difference is after the rite of marriage, if you are having a wedding with a full mass, you then have the Liturgy of the Eucharist.  If not, after the nuptial blessing, you say the Lord’s Prayer, the priest gives a blessing, then there is the dismissal and recessional.

If I remember right, if the non-Catholic party is baptized in another Christian faith, the couple has the option of having the Nuptial Mass.  If the non-Catholic party has never been baptized, then the couple must do the Rite of Marriage without the full Mass.  As HappyNOrange noted, some priests will refuse discourage a full Mass when both the bride and groom aren’t Catholic (but I still think the non-Catholic party must be baptized), but others are fine with it.  If it is important to you to have a full Mass, you might be able to find another priest who will do so. 

Tthe argument against a full Mass when either bride or groom isn’t Catholic, if I understand it correctly, is that because the non-Catholic spouse cannot partake in the Eucharist, having one spouse partake and the other not only highlights the disunity between the bride and groom’s faiths at a time when the unity of the couple is being celebrated.  I know I once attended a Nuptial Mass where the groom wasn’t Catholic (I think he was Baptist) and his family members were insulted that the bride took Communion but the groom did not.  I think this may be part of the reason a lot of priests are reluctant to do a Nuptial Mass when one party isn’t Catholic.

Post # 6
Member
51 posts
Worker bee

I (the Catholic bride) and not have a having a full Mass for my ceremony.  My fiance isn’t Catholic and about 50% of the guests aren’t so we decided not to since he, and half of the guest,  wouldn’t be to participate.  Once you are further along the priest should give you a pamphlet with all the elements of the sacrament of marriage.  I am working on a really detailed program that I can share with you if you would like (just pm me).

Post # 7
Member
33 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: July 2012

@medsie35: Hi there…I am in a similar situation where I am Catholic but my fiance has no religion. He is now in the process of becoming a Catholic! If he wasn’t becoming a Catholic then we wouldn’t do a full nuptial mass, but since he will be a Catholic by the wedding, we will have the full mass. He decided to become an official Catholic since he has been coming to mass with me for years and he wants us to be on the same page for when we have kids. Plus he didnt grow up with religion and would like his future children to. I’m marrying such a great guy! Good luck with everything!! 

Post # 8
Member
383 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

To answer the original question…the readings are the same – Mass or no Mass. The intentions or prayers of the faithful will be another place where you’ll have input if you want special prayers.

 

Your priest will walk you through it close to the wedding.

Post # 9
Member
893 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

A friend of mine had a Catholic wedding w/o communion because her husband and his family are Buddhists.  My friend was okay with this because she said it’s out of respect for her in-laws’ religion and their own.  I don’t necessarily think it’s bad to not have a full mass if one person isn’t Catholic.  My Fiance is Hindu (I’m Catholic) and we are not having a full mass either.  In fact, it will only be a blessing.  Our parish said that if we got a civil wedding first, we don’t need to do a pre-cana and we’ll just get a blessing instead. 

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