(Closed) Planning my Friend’s wedding… What do I charge?!

posted 10 years ago in Ceremony
Post # 16
Member
159 posts
Blushing bee

I would actually agree with the PP’s above. You should be careful. Money and friendships are not always the best of combo’s and with you having your kid and life in general. Say NO. She sounds like she needs help but wants it for a low cost. Just don’t let her take advantage of your kindness into something that you might regret later.

Post # 17
Member
5592 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2010

I would decline, but agree with the PP poster that I would ask her how much she’s willing to spend and come up with a contract of what you can provide at that price point.

Post # 18
Member
111 posts
Blushing bee

I have helped out several friends of mine with weddings and never charged a thing. However, I aspire to be a wedding planner so its more building a resume, for you however say NO. Thank her for asking you and tell her you wished you could but you have a little kid and would like to help you out whenever you can but not as a full time gig.

She sounds like your friend when its convieint for her… I mean seriously, not going to your reception because she had to study. I had finals the day after a friends wedding and you’d better believe I stayed till 1030 having a blast because she meant a lot to me. I just had a few 5 hour energies after that… 

Post # 19
Member
135 posts
Blushing bee

Please-Please-Please say NO! I’m a wedding planner and given the years of background I have in this industry it is a lot of work and a lot of stress that we take on. Although you planned your wedding and I’m sure it was beautiful please remember that it really takes a professional to see all of these things through. Quite simply we are paid to know everything from when to get a police detail, fire hazards, vendor contracts, liability, wedding insurance etc–etc–etc.

‘In my mind charging means that you are with great certainty skilled and trained to handle this–I know I’m going to get a lot of slack for saying this…but look at it this way…..this is your 1st wedding (aside from your own) and you likely don’t know what to do when something goes wrong. I’ve heard really awful stories of brides suing wedding planners because they “reuined” their day—it’s an extreme example but it’s a true one.

If you are really serious about doing her wedding then I think ethically you shouldn’t charge–AT ALL. Use this as an opportunity to build your portfolio and ask for photographs so that you can use them for marketing purposes…..

I agree with the other bee’s too it also seems like she’s trying to use you—this is just a bad idea all around–sorry.  

 

Post # 20
Member
103 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

I have another alternative to offer. Since you have already spent some time working on inspiration boards and everything, you can tell her you’ll help her with the design and concept and charge something minimal for that. Since she can’t pay too much and she probably won’t pay you 1,000, tell her that for 200-300 you’ll help her find the design and concept of the wedding, like what colors, flowers, details etc to use. But that she would have to take care of talking to vendors and actually purchasing everything.

If she doesn’t accept that then I don’t think you should do it. If she’s a true friend she’ll understand.

Post # 21
Member
5879 posts
Bee Keeper

Everything I thought has already been said. She’s gonna work you to death for nothing. It would be one thing if you didn’t have a baby but no way, especially after how she treated you as an after thought. Screw her.

Post # 22
Member
135 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

Or just tell her the minimum fee is $10,000 (75% due upfront)… :o) Obviously she cant pay that and you are in the clear without having to decline the offer.

Post # 23
Member
4460 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

@omdela01: To be honest, I would decline. Sounds like she just wants something for nothing. 

Post # 24
Member
4497 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

Sounds like this friend is a bit hurtful and the first half of you post demonstrates that.

Avoid mixing friends & money.

Just like she was busy studying and rejected your wedding, just be busy with your 9 month old and enjoy attending hers.

Post # 27
Member
375 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

@omdela01: I think you should still charge for what you’ve already done for her, but if that makes you uncomfortable, just say you can’t do it and leave it at that.

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