planning pregnancy, what would you do?

posted 2 years ago in TTC
  • poll: Would you keep TTC even if it meant DS and baby 2 might share a birthday?
    no, take a break and let them have their own birthdays. : (11 votes)
    14 %
    yes, same birthday week or shared birthdays are fun! : (64 votes)
    83 %
    other (in comments below) : (2 votes)
    3 %
  • Post # 2
    Member
    9692 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: August 2016

    My dad and his brother’s birthdays are one day apart. They never had an issue with it.

    And all twins share a birthday!

    I really don’t think it’s a big deal.

    Post # 3
    Member
    242 posts
    Helper bee

    A close friend of mine has two sons with birthdays one day apart. They’re young still quite young, but it hasn’t seemed to be an issue yet.

    Kids learn how to share birthdays. Just look at twins. I think it will be as big of a deal for your son to share a birthday or have a birthday near his potential sibling’s birthday as you allow it to be. 

    Post # 4
    Member
    1754 posts
    Buzzing bee

    mrscorgi :  I was born 3 days before my brother’s birthday and my mom was induced because she didn’t want us to have the same birthday. My family always lumped our birthday celebrations together and it kind of sucked. It’s not the end of the world, but if it were me and it was in my control to plan them further apart I would.

    Post # 5
    Member
    1851 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: December 2017

    I agree that it will be as big a deal as you let it be if it ends up happening. 

    Post # 6
    Member
    2705 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    My brother, 2 of my cousins, and I all have birthday’s within 28 days of each other.  Honestly, it was never a big deal.  Sometimes we’d have combined birthday parties (me and my brother, me and one of my cousins, my brother and the other cousin, and I think we had one for all 4 of us once) and sometimes we didn’t.  Even at the combined parties, we all got our own cake and own presents and I don’t think one of us cared.  It was just fun to get to all hang out.  

    I agree with PPs – it will only be as big of a deal as you make it.

    Post # 7
    Member
    727 posts
    Busy bee

    my mom’s birthday is one day after my sister’s birthday. never seemed to be a problem growing up! i don’t think i would let something like that postpone my TTC plans tbh. 

    Post # 8
    Member
    6883 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2011

    I think you are making it more of a big deal then it is.  My son’s birthday is less than 2 weeks from mine.  My Best friend’s daughter had her son on the same day as my son’s birthday.  My son turns 6 and her son will turn 1.  We love it, that they get to share a birthday.   

    Post # 9
    Member
    1159 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2016

    I work with a woman who has 2 daughters whose birthdays are only a day apart. I think the age difference is 2-3 years between the two, but it has never been an issue as far as “sharing” a birthday week. You don’t have to have combined parties or celebrations. 

    Post # 10
    Member
    266 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: September 2016

    I don’t think you should put your TTC dreams on hold for something like sharing a birthday. As kids, it may be difficult, but think of how easy it will be when they’re adults, and they can get both families together for a weekend!

    Post # 11
    Member
    6450 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: February 1997

    That never even was a consideration for us when we were TTC. We had another baby when WE were ready because if we based it off of possibly conflicting dates (my birthday, DH’s birthday, older children’s birthdays, holidays, etc.) then we would NEVER find a good time to be pregant.

    That said, my third child was born on the same day as my first, four years later. I needed a c-section. We did an amnio at 36 weeks, but baby’s lungs were not yet mature, and they offered me a date two weeks later. I wasn’t going to say no and potentially go overdue (baby was already 11-1/2 lb at 38 weeks). But DS1 was young enough (turning 4) that he didn’t really realize the date was off when we celebrated his birthday early.

    And since then? It has been WONDERFUL to have their birthdays on the same day! I can have two parties in one and not have to do everything twice. Of course, they always get separate cakes, but at places like indoor amusement parks or bowling or other party venues each child can have their own friends and not really have to interact much with the older/younger ones. The kids have never minded having their birthdays on the same day because they’ve never known anything different. 

    Post # 12
    Member
    751 posts
    Busy bee

    I feel a bit differently to PPs in that I think I, if I were deciding for my family, I would not TTC that month. (Provided there were no fertility issues to be aware of). 

    I have a birthday very close to a big holiday and have spent my life feeling forgotten. I hate my birthday now. It’s not quite the same thing as sharing a birthday and maybe I’d feel differently if I shared a birthday with a sibling rather than a holiday but I hated the feeling when I didn’t get a party, or a separate card even (‘and happy birthday by the way’ was a staple part of my holiday cards!)

    One of my friends shares a birthday with her sibling and hates how they’re always lumped in together.

    Maybe my friends just suck and maybe it would be different but if it wasn’t going to cause any issues with conceiving/no time constraints, I’d give that one month a miss.

    Post # 13
    Member
    1868 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: April 2016

    I shared a birthday with my grandma and my sister and I are less than 2 weeks apart. Has never been an issue! 

    Post # 14
    Member
    780 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: February 2015

    I’m pregnant with baby #2 and I’m due one day before my Dear Daughter second birthday. My Dear Daughter shares her birthday with my Brother-In-Law, and he’s so excited and hopes this baby is born on the same day too.

    My sisters birthdays are one week apart and we have a cousin who’s birthday is one day before the the second one. And an aunt a day after. It’s never been a problem, in fact we all celebrate together now as adults and it’s so much fun.

     

     

    Post # 15
    Member
    2188 posts
    Buzzing bee

    I mean, in a dream world, the birthdays would be farther apart, but TTC is hard, and I can’t imagine taking a month off. As many PP said, your kids will get used to it if they are all close together.

    But, there are also so many unknowns. You may deliver much earlier than planned, you may ovulate much later, you may not get pregnant this month. I’d say go for it, or at least take a NTNP look to this month, but I wouldn’t TTA.

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