(Closed) Planning wedding: What did you realize you could live without and why?

posted 8 years ago in Beehive
Post # 3
573 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

There were probably a lot of things, but here are a couple:

a large bouquet – I just couldn’t stand to pay $100-200 for a bouquet of flowers

bouquet and garter tosses – I dislike them, and also it left more time for dancing



Post # 4
645 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

No champagne toast…everyone can toast with whatever drink they have in hand.

You probably already know this, but you can reuse your bridesmaids bouquets for the reception. You can do very heavy appetizers instead of a full meal…beer and wine…no videographer…have “fake” layers on your cake and use a sheet cake for servings.


Post # 5
988 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

The biggest thing that almost broke my heart were my precious Chiavari chairs! I was dead set on them and I didn’t care how much money they coste me I had to have them! Well fast forward to me actually seeing the cheap plastic chairs they were trying to rent to me for $7 a piece and I happily decided to go with my chair covers (which I originally thought were “tacky” lol) 

Post # 6
1148 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

We’re skipping most of what you’ve listed and also programs, save the dates, and the venue I wanted originally. Instead of paying $5k for just the ceremony, we’re doing the ceremony and reception at a local church and just donating $3-500 for the use of the space. We’re also skipping a full dinner with multiple courses/buffet. Instead we’re thinking an app, entree, and dessert, but all contemporary sized or close to it. The entree is squid ink pasta, we’re thinking about a few different ideas for the appetizer, with butternut squash something being one of them and dessert is going to be our cupcakes we’re having instead of a wedding cake with fondant and all the extras. We’re self-catering and borrowing tons of stuff from people our families know and I’m DIYing a bunch of stuff. We have a friend designing our invites and I’m going to check the price of having a website print them for us and if we can do it cheaper then we will. We are planning on having escort cards and I think we’re going to check the price of having our photographer print Thank You cards for us with our pictures. Pretty much anything we can do ourselves, we’re doing ourselves. You could also look into having non-candle centerpieces. They’re not allowed in our church, so it actually cut a lot of ideas out, but it turns out that we’re probably saving money in the long run as candles can be rather expensive.

Sorry this got so long, I just kept thinking of stuff to add. Basically we’re having a 75 person wedding on a $5000 budget.

Post # 7
9 posts
  • Wedding: August 2010

I gave up on:

-a candy buffet (realized it was going to take too much time to aquire all the bits & pieces needed, and that with what I was willing to spend, I probably wouldn’t be very happy with the results anyway.)

-elaborate reception centerpieces (went from 3 vases of different flowers at multiple heights to one short vase conbining the 3 kinds of flowers, both to save money and to avoid having guests put the taller vases on the floor to make conversation easier).

-elaborate DIY projects involving extensive use of papercutters or creative “vision” (I’m short on time, my family members, though I love them to death, are short on artistic ability, and anything I make needs to be either shipped or hand carried from Tokyo to New York).

-spending too much time shopping around for minor details (in the end, it isn’t going to matter EXACTLY what shade of ivory the candles in the church are, or that I saved $1.50 on tulle…time is valuable too!)

Post # 8
804 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2010

We’re not having a DJ – we’re doing the ipod thing.
Seeing as our ceremony and reception are at the same venue I gave up my cute black beetles we were gonna have as cars. Sadface – they were so cute! I realised after starting full time work that I could do without DIY invitations (too time consuming!!!) and budget means we’re foregoing a videographer. We’re also not doing centrepieces for a few reasons, mainly cos we’re having long tressle tables and our venue offered to let us raid their rose garden so my mum and my sister are gonna put their mad flower arranging skills to good use. Plus, I always think big centrepieces just end up being looked around by people trying to have conversations!

Post # 9
60 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

We gave up on a videographer, elaborate centerpieces, favors (we’re donating to charity instead), chair covers/bows, bouquet/garter (I’m just not a huge fan), and a professional florist (FI’s aunt is a former flower arranger and I’m only using gerbera daisies instead of a wide variety). It’s really helped a lot for money saving!

Oh, and we switched from sit-down dinner to buffet. We’re pretty casual people so it wasn’t a huge deal to us, as long as the food still tasted great!

Post # 10
283 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

Well, my list of things that are not high priority:

– Transport on the day (no horse carriage, no limousine, just borrowing a car)

– Flowers! (centerpieces are included in the cost of the venue, the only flowers I’ll buy are my bouqet)

– Cake. This one was the hardest to let go, but at around 10-15$ a piece in our area, it just wasn’t a high enough priority for us. Therefore, we are baking it ourselves.

– I’m doing my make-up myself

This left us enough money to prioritize the things that really ment something to us: Venue+food, photography and the honeymoon.

Post # 11
61 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

– Limo

– Ice Cream to go with the cake

– Lounge Furniture

– DJ to compliment the band

Post # 12
562 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

– Additional linen rental – our venue has perfectly fine and beautiful ivory floor length linens, why pay extra for some cloth for people to get dirty and wipe their mouths on when what you alrady have is fine – this includes chair covers too

– Elaborate invitations..cuz they’re just paper!

– floral centerpieces – We went to a florist and saw some gorgeous ones…for like $200 each and at 18 tables it’s waaay too much for me.  I’m making ours for about $25 a table

Things we really focused on and allocated most of our budget to are the reception venue (it’s one of those places that come with almost everything) and photography because we want people to have good food, drink and a great time and we wanted great photos to capture the day and remember it.

Post # 14
101 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

We have been very lucky to have so many people that are willing to help us for free. Use your family and friends as much as possible such as

The minister at my grandmas church will marry is for free.

My aunt who is amazing at cake making is making our cake for us as our wedding gift. She is also opening up her river house for our venue for FREE!

We are also having an Oct wedding so we are useing pumpkins and votive candles for center pieces to save a ton on flowers!

And we have decided to do BBQ buffet instead of a sit down dinner.

Alas look for a freelance photographer that is not affiliated with a company. Cuts that cost in half if not more!

These are some of the things we did to save money. We are having a wedding with 100ish guests for approx $3500!!

Post # 15
295 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010 - The Atlantic Beach Club

Honeymoon – we decided we can take oen at another point

Post # 16
2829 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

Things we’re cutting for our cost effective, anti-debt, celebratory love fest:

-pro-flowers/heavy floral centerpieces/boutineers. Instead we’re diy’ing simply bouquets for myself & the ladies, My FH doesn’t care about bout’s, he said he’ll ‘think about it’ meaning, if the fancy strikes him and our Cala lilies are in season he might pick one and put it in a button hole.. oh boys..!

-catering/plated meal. We’re opting for either a ‘brunch’ time reception of mid afternoon [working around main meal times to avoid having to spend a buttwhack of cash to feed the masses].

-DJ/Videographer. Just no. Ipod & two actual pro DJ’s in my circle of friends is enough for a collaborative, continuous, [hopefully fool proof] playlist for ambiance.Also my G-pa is a bit of a video whizz. Even though he’s 76, he still INSISTS on being THEE GUY to make the family home movies, and he has already implied on the sly that he’d like to do this for us as his gift.

-limiting alcohol/going dry. My FH & i are not drinkers by any means of the imagination. We’ll have a drink on occasion, but not every night/weekend. Due to the times we have in mind for our reception, we don’t feel that alcohol is really necessary [really, who plans on drinking themselves blind at 10am or 2pm?]. If we do have anything, it certainly won’t be open bar, and if we run out? Oh well, it’s not like we’re dancing the night away.

Which brings me to my next point of learning to live without:

-Selecting a venue sans dance floor/ball room. J& I are the couple that dance only when no one is looking, or when we’re TRYING to look as ridiculous as possible. It is just not our thing, graceful we are not, haha. So, by narrowing our venues to those that are ‘less fancy’ [not really, just ‘simpler’] we’ve already seen a large pprice variance.

-Likely no pro-MUA/Hair etc. A very good friend of mine is studying to be a MUA, and my cousins wife IS one, so while I don’t intend on ‘hiring’ them per se, I do intend on asking for tips/recommendations before the big day. I will likely end up doing my hair/make up/nails etc myself.

-10k couture gown. Lovely? Yes! Practical? No. Would my FH run screaming from the room tearing his hair out a la Homer Simpson? Yes. 10k couture gown, not for me!

-favors. We’re going edible on this one, likely DIY, more money for my pocket..err, mortgage payment 😛

The one thing I really want to splurge on is photography, but that is also the one thing J&I disagree on most. I plan on using some networking skills to try and find a decent [who am I kidding I want an AWESOME] photog with a good price range.

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