(Closed) Planning without a proposal

posted 6 years ago in Waiting
  • poll: Will you wait for the ring or has planning already begun?
    I wouldn't consider anything until I am engaged : (32 votes)
    30 %
    I have had a look at a few things : (48 votes)
    46 %
    I cant stop looking- im hooked! : (16 votes)
    15 %
    I have ordered a few things : (3 votes)
    3 %
    I have most off the planning done : (5 votes)
    5 %
    Im done! E ring or not! : (1 votes)
    1 %
  • Post # 3
    384 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: December 2012

    You definitely won’t be alone, I hear it’s pretty common. I’m the odd case, didn’t start planning at all until about a month and a half before the wedding. Over 10 months after the official engagement.

    Post # 4
    624 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: February 2014

    @IreGal:  I dont think it is wrong at all to look at things! I know plenty of girls that have picked out things before they were engaged. I think its good to know what you like now so when the time comes thats less work to do! I’m guilty of checking out some things myself. And I def dont think checking things out now means you will be a bridezilla! 


    Post # 5
    4047 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: January 2014

    I think it’s good to have ideas. Where, when, colors, theme, photography, etc. The day I got engaged people were asking me wedding details like I should already have a clear vision! That said, I would never order anything or have my heart dead set on anything before getting engaged. It is nice to look around for ideas though.

    Post # 6
    120 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    Before I got engaged I had the wedding planned. When then boyfriend and I were talking about getting married we had no idea as far as a budget how far our money could go. So this was a great excuse to start looking at things. Then I couldn’t stop looking. I even had a wedding binder before I was officially engaged. So take it from me, it’s ok.

    Post # 7
    162 posts
    Blushing bee

    I think it’s fine as long as your SO is okay with it. I’ve planned a lot of the wedding (in my head, not booking anything) because we want to be married in a year and I’m just waiting for the proposal. We picked a ring and it should be coming by Spring. He wants me to do a lot of it so we can just go visit the places and enjoy our engagement without all the added pressure of initial research.

    Post # 8
    3420 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2014 - Manhattan Church Rec Center

    I allowed myself to look at dresses (but not touch) and e-rings while I was waiting. I thought I had done a lot of pre-planning but now that I am on the other side, I realized the first thing I need is a photographer…zionks…I didn’t think of that…

    Post # 9
    1144 posts
    Bumble bee

    I have my colors picked, my venue picked (my Nanna’s farm). I have an excel spreadsheet of pricing and guest list. I’ve looked into tent, chair, table, linens rental. I know our budget (SO and I talked about it before). I have pinned dresses and details onto Pinterest. I have not ordered anything but have thought about it but have considered starting to gather some things to make it more cost effective (i.e. stamps, scrabble tiles, lanterns, etc)

    Post # 10
    1669 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: August 2014

    We’re totally going to do the big no-no and book the church and the reception venue before we get officially “engaged”. In our case though, it’s waiting till I meet his (out of the country) parents to get engaged and not wanting to try to plan the wedding in under 6 months (we’re in a visa crunch)

    We’re not going to start till this summer (engagement this coming christmas) but not going to lie, it’s going to be a little weird, because I’m usually like “how DARE YE PLAN WITHOUT THE RING”.

    We just had a couple of glasses of wine and went “yeah we’re gonna have to do that”.

    Of course now that I have permission, I am like a monster unleashed trying not to bring it up until this summer. I’m pinning things like a woman posessed.

    Post # 11
    1193 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: April 2013

    I think it depends on your situation my FFI and I have talked marriage for months. At first we were trying to wait a year (it was a very quick romance) because we just felt like we should. It just seemed a standard amount if time and neither of us wanted to rush. However about 9months in we realized that it was silly to wait just to say we dated a year. Now the hold up is finances. He has two kids and has had some furloughs on his job so he can’t but a ring right now. as soon as he gets the ring we’ll be set. I even told him I don’t need a ring but he’s not having it!

    Post # 12
    523 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: August 2014

    WELL my SO had me plan a budget and i already know where i want to have it, know what type of dresses i want and have my bridal party figured out.. so it really depends.. I think its good to be prepared but we definitely havent gone beyond a budget.

    Post # 13
    699 posts
    Busy bee

    @IreGal:  last year, i had bought  a few magazines, looked online, not buying anything. might still look but thats it for this year lol

    Post # 14
    4575 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: April 2012

    @IreGal:  Oh gosh my BFF was the same way, but the funny thing now that she is engaged she is not even planning, but mostly b/c her Fiance told her she is not allow to do so…he is a jerk (another story)…but no you are not alone on this, there are many girls that do this before they get engaged…enjoy!

    Post # 15
    839 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2014

    I am not yet engaged (although I think it is coming soon!), but I already have everything planned in my head, I just haven’t booked anything yet. My mom has been purchasing things here and there that she sees that fit my theme, and I already have my guest list done (although I know it will probably change by then). Actually my mom is the one who suggested I start getting my guest list together because that takes a long time and really determines where you can choose your venue (have to know if it will hold enough people!) So no, don’t feel weird, there are tons of bees on here who have been planning for a wedding without a proposal.

    Post # 16
    2716 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    I think it’s ok to look at stuff before ou are engaged (I know I did).  It’s really hard not to, especially now that Pinterest exists.  Just don’t order anything – it wouldn’t be smart.

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